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Funny Southeast Quotes
Funny Quotes about Southeast

Let these funny Southeast Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

I wanted to see exotic Vietnam, the jewel of Southeast Asia.
I, uh, I wanted to meet interesting
and stimulating people of an ancient culture,
and kill them.
- the movie Full Metal Jacket

My boyfriend and I broke up.
He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
- Rita Rudner

After fifteen minutes I wanted to marry her,
and after half an hour
I completely gave up the idea of stealing her purse.
- the movie Take the Money and Run (1969)

I have often wanted to drown my troubles,
but I can't get my wife to go swimming.
- Anonymous


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In all our contacts, it is probably the sense
of being really needed and wanted
which gives us the greatest satisfaction
and creates the most lasting bond.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Today is the right day to do
what you have long wanted to do.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. "Pooh?" he whispered.
"Yes, Piglet?"
"Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's hand.
"I just wanted to be sure of you."
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)


 

Sometimes you get the results you wanted,
sometimes you don't.
What matters is that you did your best.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A somebody was once a nobody who wanted to and did.
- John Burroughs

Even the rich are hungry for love,
for being cared for, for being wanted,
for having someone to call their own.
- Mother Teresa

Some people wanted champagne and caviar
when they should have had beer and hot dogs.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

In my prayers I never said I needed a home.
I said I wanted a sanctuary.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

I wanted to know the name of every stone
and flower and insect and bird and beast.
I wanted to know where it got its color, where it got its life -
but there was no one to tell me.
- George Washington Carver

I wanted to be a doctor that I might be able to work
without having to talk
because for years I had been giving myself out in words.
- Albert Schweitzer

A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend -
and he's a priest.
- Erma Bombeck

Save a boyfriend for a rainy day -
and another, in case it doesn't rain.
- Mae West

The proper office of a friend is to side with you
when you are in the wrong.
Nearly anybody will side with you when you are in the right.
- Mark Twain

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
- Groucho Marx

A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail.
A best friend is the one sitting next
to you saying "boy was that fun."
- The Maugles

You want a friend in Washington? Get a dog.
- Harry S. Truman

A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
- Erma Bombeck

I was the kid next door's imaginary friend.
- Emo Phillips

The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet
and steady and loyal and enduring a nature
that it will last through a whole lifetime,
if not asked to lend money.
- Mark Twain

The feeling of friendship is like that
of being comfortably filled with roast beef;
love, like being enlivened with champagne.
- Samuel Johnson

Barf: I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend!
- the movie Spaceballs (1987)

My wife ran off with my best friend, and I sure do miss him.
- Anonymous

I'm a very loyal and unreliable friend.
- Bono

A lifelong friend is someone
you haven't borrowed money from yet.
- Anonymous

A loyal friend laughs at your jokes
when they're not so good,
and sympathizes with your problems
when they're not so bad.
- Arnold H. Glasgow

A true friend stabs you in the front.
- Oscar Wilde

Do not use a hatchet to remove
a fly from your friend's forehead.
- Chinese Proverb

Except in cases of necessity, which are rare,
leave your friend to learn
unpleasant things from his enemies;
they are ready enough to tell them.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

A true friend is one who
overlooks your failures
and tolerates your success.
- Doug Larson

The enemy of my enemy is my friend.
- Arabic Proverb and Chinese Proverb

I never considered a difference of opinion
in politics, in religion, in philosophy,
as cause for withdrawing from a friend.
- Thomas Jefferson

The walls we build around us to
keep sadness out also keeps out the joy.
- Jim Rohn

A friend is someone who knows all about you,
and loves you just the same.
- Elbert Hubbard

A true friend is someone who
thinks that you are a good egg
even though he knows that
you are slightly cracked.
- Bernard Meltzer

The most called-upon prerequisite of a friend is an accessible ear.
- Maya Angelou

The price of freedom for a nation is lives and money.
Often, the price of freedom for an individual
is challenging the closed minds of family and friend.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

This day I will marry my friend,
the one I laugh with, live for, dream with, love.
- Anonymous

I never found a companion that was
so companionable as solitude.
- Henry David Thoreau

The language of Friendship is not words, but meanings.
It is an intelligence above language.
- Henry David Thoreau

Our chief want is someone who will inspire us
to be what we know we could be.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Farewell My Friend
It was beautiful as long as it lasted
The journey of my life.
I have no regrets whatsoever
save the pain I'll leave behind.
Those dear hearts who love and care...
And the strings pulling at the heart and soul...
The strong arms that held me up
When my own strength let me down.
At every turning of my life
I came across good friends,
Friends who stood by me,
Even when the time raced me by.
Farewell, farewell my friends
I smile and bid you goodbye.
No, shed no tears for I need them not
All I need is your smile.
If you feel sad do think of me
for that's what I'll like
when you live in the hearts
of those you love, remember then
you never die.
- Gitanjali Ghei

The happiest moments my heart knows are those in which
it is pouring forth its affections to a few esteemed characters.
- Thomas Jefferson

The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that
they can grow separately without growing apart.
- Elisabeth Foley

The greatest gift is a portion of thyself.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The key is to keep company only with people who uplift you,
whose presence calls forth your best.
- Epictetus

The easiest kind of friendship for me
is with ten thousand people.
The hardest is with one.
- Joan Baez

The finest kind of friendship is between people
who expect a great deal of each other but never ask it.
- Anonymous

The meeting of two personalities is
like the contact of two chemical substances:
if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
- Carl Jung

The greatest compliment that was ever paid me
was when one asked me what I thought,
and attended to my answer.
- Henry David Thoreau

A friend may well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

A friend is one who walks in when others walk out
- Walter Winchell

A true friend never gets in your way
unless you happen to be going down.
- Arnold H. Glasgow

When you part from your friend, you grieve not;
For that which you love most in him may be
clearer in his absence,
as the mountain to the climber
is clearer from the plain.
- Khalil Gibran

A new friend is like new wine;
when it has aged you will drink it with pleasure.
- Ecclesiastes 9:10

An injured friend is the bitterest of foes.
- Thomas Jefferson

This communicating of a man's self to his friend
works two contrary effects;
for it redoubleth joys, and cutteth griefs in half.
- Francis Bacon

Walking with a friend in the dark is better
than walking alone in the light.
- Helen Keller

Everyone has a "best friend" during each stage of life,
but only a precious few have the same one.
- Anonymous

A friend is one before whom I can think aloud.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

I value the friend who for me finds time on his calendar,
but I cherish the friend who for me
does not consult his calendar.
- Robert Brault

So long as we are loved by others,
I would almost say that we are indispensable;
and no man is useless while he has a friend.
- Robert Louis Stevenson

If I mayn't tell you what I feel,
what is the use of a friend?
- William Makepeace Thackeray

He's my friend that speaks well of me behind my back.
- Thomas Fuller

Go oft to the house of thy friend,
for weeds choke the unused path.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Work Hard. Do your best. Keep your word.
Never get too big for your britches.
Trust in God. Have no fear;
and Never forget a friend.
- Harry S. Truman

I choose you as my friend, and rejoice.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We can never replace a friend.
When a man is fortunate enough to have several,
he finds they are all different.
No one has a double in friendship.
- Johann Schiller


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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