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Let these funny Intolerable Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
The only thing that makes life possible
is permanent, intolerable uncertainty;
not knowing what comes next.
- Ursula K. Le Guin
I have tried lately to read Shakespeare,
and found it so intolerably dull that it nauseated me.
- Charles Darwin
Intolerance betrays want of faith in one's cause.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
I never will, by any word or act, bow to the shrine of intolerance
or admit a right of inquiry into the religious opinions of others.
- Thomas Jefferson
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Anger and intolerance are the enemies of correct understanding.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Intolerance is itself a form of violence
and an obstacle to the growth of a true democratic spirit.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Betrayal betrays the betrayer.
- Erica Jong
Life ... full of loneliness, and misery,
and suffering, and unhappiness,
and it's all over much too quickly.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall
It is sad but unfortunately true that
man learns nothing from history.
- Carl Jung
A relationship, I think, is like a shark.
You know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies.
And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall (1977)
I'm awash in self-contempt!
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity
It is sad to grow old but nice to ripen.
- Brigitte Bardot
All discarded lovers should be given a second chance,
but with somebody else.
- Mae West
One's first love is always perfect
until one meets one's second love.
- Elizabeth Aston
Human salvation lies in the hands
of the creatively maladjusted.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Regrets are the tears of good deeds left undone
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Write your Sad times in Sand,
Write your Good times in Stone.
- George Bernard Shaw
A big part of letting go is recognizing
when it is time to stay in a situation
and when it is time to move on.
- Darren L. Johnson
Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition,
is not only a waste of energy
but the worst habit you could possibly have.
- Dale Carnegie
For all sad words of tongue and pen,
The saddest are these, "It might have been.
- John Greenleaf Whittier
I am a self-centered spoiled-rotten brat,
Thank you for nurturing me.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A moment without joy is an eternity of sadness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It is far better to be alone,
than to be in bad company.
- George Washington
I never considered a difference of opinion
in politics, in religion, in philosophy,
as cause for withdrawing from a friend.
- Thomas Jefferson
Do you feel stuck?
Whether in a project, a job, a relationship,
or some other situation,
there is a time for perseverance,
and a time for letting go and moving on.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It is a miracle that curiosity survives formal education.
- Albert Einstein
Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth
until the hour of separation.
- Khalil Gibran
True friendship's laws are by this rule express'd,
Welcome the coming, speed the parting guest.
- Alexander Pope
Most men lead lives of quiet desperation
and go to the grave with the song still in them.
- Henry David Thoreau
Speak when you are angry -
and you will make the best speech you'll ever regret.
- Laurence J. Peter
Some things will never seem adequate
no matter how hard we try.
- from the movie White Man's Burden
A true friend is one who
overlooks your failures
and tolerates your success.
- Doug Larson
Morality is the theory that every human act
must be either right or wrong,
and that 99 % of them are wrong.
- H. L. Mencken
Those who own much have much to fear.
- Rabindranath Tagore
Mind Chatter...
"I'm too fat; I'm too thin; and my hair is a fright;
And I'm never enough; and my world is not right;
I'm not smart; I'm not cute; I'm not strong; I'm a bust
I earn scorn; I earn hate; I'm no good; I disgust."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
What's done is done.
- William Shakespeare
True love is a process of co-creation
in which neither feels ownership or superiority.
Jealousy is a highly destructive force
for love and relationships.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
"Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare,
The lone and level sands stretch far away.
- Percy Bysshe Shelley
Love does not claim possession, but gives freedom.
- Rabindranath Tagore
Life is as easy or as hard as you think it is.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
When It's Darkest, Men See the Stars.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Worry often gives a small thing a big shadow.
- Swedish Proverb
The way I see it, if you want the rainbow,
you gotta put up with the rain.
- Dolly Parton
Farewell My Friend
It was beautiful as long as it lasted
The journey of my life.
I have no regrets whatsoever
save the pain I'll leave behind.
Those dear hearts who love and care...
And the strings pulling at the heart and soul...
The strong arms that held me up
When my own strength let me down.
At every turning of my life
I came across good friends,
Friends who stood by me,
Even when the time raced me by.
Farewell, farewell my friends
I smile and bid you goodbye.
No, shed no tears for I need them not
All I need is your smile.
If you feel sad do think of me
for that's what I'll like
when you live in the hearts
of those you love, remember then
you never die.
- Gitanjali Ghei
The darkest night is often the bridge to the brightest tomorrow.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Success is failure recycled.
Life is death reborn.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I believe that everything happens for a reason.
People change so that you can learn to let go,
things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right,
you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself,
and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.
- Marilyn Monroe
Our lives begin to end the day we become silent
about things that matter.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Distance cannot matter - ours is a friendship of the heart.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Love means not ever having to say you're sorry.
- Erich Segal
There is nothing more depressing,
than having everything,
and still feeling sad.
- Janet Jackson
I seldom think about my limitations,
and they never make me sad.
Perhaps there is just a touch of yearning at times;
but it is vague, like a breeze among flowers.
- Helen Keller
I leave no trace of wings in the air,
but I am glad I have had my flight.
- Rabindranath Tagore
You're only here for a short visit.
Don't hurry. Don't worry.
And be sure to smell the flowers along the way.
- Walter Hagen
Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates.
You never know what you're gonna get.
- the movie Forrest Gump
My Mama always said you've got to put the past behind you
before you can move on.
- the movie Forrest Gump
No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear.
- C. S. Lewis
I take rejection as someone blowing a bugle in my ear
to wake me up and get going, rather than retreat.
- Sylvester Stallone
Life doesn't play favorites.
- Anonymous
Time is carnivorous.
Urgency rips the peaceful flesh from our bones.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Politeness is organized indifference.
- Paul Valery
Every relationship is just so tenuous and precarious.
- Larry David
Envy breeds hate.
- Yiddish Proverb
When life offers you a dream so far
beyond any of your expectations,
it's not reasonable to grieve when it comes to an end.
- Bella, from Twilight saga by Stephenie Meyer
I was thinking that I might fly today.
Just to disprove all the things you say...
please be careful with me, I'm sensitive,
and I'd like to stay that way.
- Jewel
You know you love someone when you know
you want them to be happy,
even if their happiness means
that you are not a part of it.
- Anonymous
Momma always said dyin' was a part of life.
I sure wish it wasn't.
- the movie Forrest Gump
The walls we build around us to
keep sadness out also keeps out the joy.
- Jim Rohn
Today is your day to laugh at life,
laugh at what's funny - laugh at what's sad,
laugh loud - laugh often,
laugh at me - laugh at you - laugh at life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Collective fear stimulates herd instinct,
and tends to produce ferocity toward
those who are not regarded as members of the herd.
- Bertrand Russell
The Principal Causes of Our Suffering
are Our Expectations and Our Assumptions.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.