Let these funny Design Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
If I knew for a certainty that a man was coming to my house
with the conscious design of doing me good,
I should run for my life.
- Henry David Thoreau
The universe we observe has precisely
the properties we should expect
if there is, at bottom, no design,
no purpose, no evil, no good,
nothing but blind, pitiless indifference.
- Charles Darwin
I think wholeness is God's design for us;
and that often amounts to embracing contradictions.
- Bono
Do real life people actually fall in love
with the idea of being in love?
Unfortunately, it is actually quite common.
Someone wants desperately to have
the husband or wife of their dreams.
They visualize the vine-covered cottage
with the white picket fence.
They choose the colors for the nursery.
They design all the aspects of their married life.
A real person stands no chance of measuring up to those fantasies.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Get a Funny Quote of the Day each day by email or in your feed reader.
Today is the bridge between the past,
regarding which we unconditionally accept that
everything has occurred according to God's plan,
and a future where we place our unconditional trust
in God's omnipotence and His benevolent design for our lives.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Dependence begets subservience and venality,
suffocates the germ of virtue,
and prepares fit tools for the designs of ambition.
- Thomas Jefferson
I look for what needs to be done.
After all, that's how the universe designs itself.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
Know that your life is designed to be an adventure.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A designer is an emerging synthesis of artist, inventor,
mechanic, objective economist and evolutionary strategist.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
Which beliefs bring out the best in you?
Which beliefs hold you prisoner to yesterday
and limit your options for designing a great future?
Test your beliefs with as much objectivity
as you can bring to the subject.
Be willing to let go of those beliefs
that represent your parents' opinions,
or your communities opinions, rather than your own.
Those beliefs that withstand rigorous testing,
should become the foundation of your being -
your reason for living.
Take action on those beliefs.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
In religion and politics, people's belief's and convictions
are in almost every case gotten at second hand,
and without examination
- Mark Twain
We are born believing.
A man bears beliefs as a tree bears apples.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
What people believe prevails over the truth.
- Sophocles
Assumptions are beliefs that don't know they are beliefs.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Before moving on, you have to clear away your cherished beliefs.
- Dick Raymond
Everyone believes that their beliefs are the right ones -
that is why they are called beliefs.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Belief fuels our decisions -
even when we are not clearly aware of those beliefs.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
It is not my place to doubt the sincere beliefs of others.
My job is to question my own beliefs.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Our grandchildren's grandchildren will shake their heads in shame
at some of the beliefs that we hold most dear today -
the question is, which ones?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Irrational beliefs are culturally accepted delusions.
- Robert Todd Carroll
Live your beliefs and you can turn the world around.
- Henry David Thoreau
Tolerance implies no lack of commitment to one's own beliefs.
Rather it condemns the oppression or persecution of others.
- John F. Kennedy
Let light shine through the cracks
in the armor of your staunchest beliefs.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Have convictions. Be friendly.
Stick to your beliefs as they stick to theirs.
Work as hard as they do.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Most people don't CHOOSE their value system -
they simply inherit the beliefs of their parents and community.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I am responsible for my thoughts, my beliefs, and my actions.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The inherent nature of God
is not changed by our individual beliefs,
our religious institutions,
or our communal traditions.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
We become not a melting pot but a beautiful mosaic.
Different people, different beliefs,
different yearnings, different hopes, different dreams.
- Jimmy Carter
Beliefs have evolved based on survival value.
Certain belief systems have been more conducive than others
to people living long enough to reproduce,
and having a high rate of reproduction.
It's that basic.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Recall a recent time when someone was strongly critical
of your opinions (perhaps your political or religious beliefs).
Now, put yourself in their shoes - with compassion.
Try to understand and appreciate their point-of-view -
not to change your own opinions,
but to celebrate all our human differences - in peace.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The test of all beliefs is their practical effect in life.
If it be true that optimism compels the world forward,
and pessimism retards it, then it is dangerous to
propagate a pessimistic philosophy.
- Helen Keller
Each of us holds a different image of God.
There are as many perspectives on
the nature of God as there are people.
However much any of us may choose to argue,
or to fight and kill, for our point of view,
the nature of God is an unanswerable question.
Perhaps there is a specific answer,
that we will never learn - in this lifetime.
Perhaps the nature of God is so complex and multifaceted
that each view of God describes an aspect of the complex whole.
Or perhaps the nature of God is actually defined by our beliefs.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Meddling:
Everything that happens in the world, or doesn't happen,
is NOT my responsibility.
There are more than enough things that are my responsibility.
I am responsible for my thoughts, my beliefs, and my actions -
and that is enough.
It does not serve me to mind anyone else's business.
I can only make myself unhappy by trying to second guess
what anyone else thinks or does.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Morality is simply the attitude we adopt
towards people whom we personally dislike.
- Oscar Wilde
Religion is the masterpiece of the art of animal training,
for it trains people as to how they should think.
- Arthur Schopenhauer
I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell -
you see, I have friends in both places.
- Mark Twain
Anyone who can worship a trinity
and insist that his religion is a monotheism
can believe anything.
- Robert A Heinlein
Oh, if only God would give me some sign.
If He would just speak to me once. Anything.
One sentence. Two words. If He would just cough.
- the movie Love and Death
Almost any sect, cult, or religion will
legislate its creed into law
if it acquires the political power.
- Robert A. Heinlein
I don't doubt God. I have firm faith absolutely in God.
It's religion I'm doubting.
- Bono
Question with boldness even the existence of a God;
because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason,
than that of blind-folded fear.
- Thomas Jefferson
The church is always trying to get other people to reform;
it might not be a bad idea to reform itself a little,
by way of example.
- Mark Twain
You know your god is man-made when he
hates all the same people you do.
- Anonymous
It ain't those parts of the Bible
that I can't understand that bother me,
it is the parts that I do understand.
- Mark Twain
If someone had told me I would be Pope one day,
I would have studied harder.
- Pope John Paul I
The existence of an anthropomorphic
"Father-figure" deity is not impossible,
merely exceptionally improbable and illogical.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Computers are like Old Testament gods;
lots of rules and no mercy.
- Joseph Campbell
Morality is the theory that every human act
must be either right or wrong,
and that 99 % of them are wrong.
- H. L. Mencken
Gods always behave like the people who make them.
- Zora Neale Hurston
If Christ were here now there is one thing
he would not be - a Christian.
- Mark Twain
True believers just don't see things the way they are,
because if they did, they wouldn't be true believers anymore.
- Philip Caputo
We are all atheists about most of the gods
that societies have ever believed in.
Some of us just go one god further.
- Richard Dawkins
Morality which depends upon the helplessness
of a man or woman has not much to recommend it.
Morality is rooted in the purity of our hearts.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
The invisible and nonexistent look much alike.
- Delos B. McKown
An idea isn't responsible for the people who believe in it.
- Don Marquis
The way I see it, it doesn't matter what you believe,
just so you're sincere.
- Linus Van Pelt in Charles M. Schulz' Go Fly A Kite, Charlie Brown
For centuries, theologians have been explaining
the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.
- H. L. Mencken
It is an open question whether any behavior
based on fear of eternal punishment
can be regarded as ethical
or should be regarded as merely cowardly.
- Margaret Mead
I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln
One man's "magic" is another man's engineering.
"Supernatural" is a null word.
- Robert A. Heinlein
If we were meant to be happy,
why did God create war, hunger, and the 11 o'clock news?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The Christian missionary may preach the gospel
to the poor naked heathen,
but the spiritual heathen who populate Europe
have as yet heard nothing of Christianity.
- Carl Jung
You can safely assume that you've
created God in your own image
when it turns out that God hates
all the same people you do.
- Anne Lamott
If it turns out that there IS a God,
I don't think that he's evil.
I think that the worst you can say about him
is that basically he's an underachiever.
- the movie Love and Death
It is the things for which there is no evidence
that are believed with passion.
- Bertrand Russell
Never trust spiritual leader who doesn't dance.
- Miyagi: character in the movie The Next Karate Kid
The essence of all religions is one.
Only their approaches are different.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
I don't know which will go first - rock 'n' roll or Christianity.
- John Lennon
Creationists make it sound as though a "theory'
is something you dreamt up after being drunk all night.
- Isaac Asimov
The way to silence religious disputes is to take no notice of them.
- Thomas Jefferson
Jesus was all right,
but his disciples were thick and ordinary.
It's them twisting it that ruins it for me.
- John Lennon
Thank you for visiting: Funny Design Quotes - Funny Quotes about Design.
Please sign up on the form below to receive
my Free Daily Inspiration - Daily Quotes email.
You can also search my large collection of Funny Quotes.
May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.