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Let these funny Unbending Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
I am a man of fixed and unbending principles,
the first of which is to be flexible at all times.
- Everett Dirksen
A tree that is unbending, is easily broken.
- Lao Tzu
Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand 
A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
- W. C. Fields
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A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle.
- Benjamin Franklin
I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln
A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler
One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
- Ogden Nash
There are two times when a man doesn't understand a woman -
before marriage and after marriage.
- Anonymous
A man is incomplete until he is married.
After that, he is finished.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
One man's theology is another man's belly laugh.
- Robert A. Heinlein
Whenever I date a guy, I think,
"Is this the man I want my children
to spend their weekends with?"
- Rita Rudner
You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West
You can lead a man to Congress,
but you can't make him think.
- Milton Berle
Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy,
the first question I ask myself is:
is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
- Rita Rudner
No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous
Afraid? Me? A man who's licked
his weight in wild caterpillars?
Afraid? You bet I'm afraid!
- Groucho Marx
One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain
Don't marry a man to reform him -
that's what reform schools are for.
- Mae West
A man is a fool if he drinks before he reaches the age of 50,
and a fool if he doesn't afterward.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Getting divorced just because you don't love a man
is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
Barf: I'm a mog: half man, half dog. I'm my own best friend!
- the movie Spaceballs (1987)
In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
- Groucho Marx
A man likes his wife to be
just clever enough to appreciate his cleverness,
and just stupid enough to admire it.
- Israel Zangwill
Men always want to be a woman's first love -
women like to be a man's last romance.
- Oscar Wilde
He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of.
- Mae West
Give a man one rabbit, and he will eat for a day;
give a man two rabbits, and he will
feed his family and his neighbors
and return you 64,768 rabbits in change.
- Anonymous
It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous
Man is a clever animal who behaves like an imbecile.
- Albert Schweitzer
The man who reads nothing at all
is better educated than the man who reads nothing but newspapers.
- Thomas Jefferson
God must love the common man, he made so many of them.
- Abraham Lincoln
Man will occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.
- Winston Churchill
Morality which depends upon the helplessness
of a man or woman has not much to recommend it.
Morality is rooted in the purity of our hearts.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Never stir up litigation.
A worse man can scarcely be found than one who does this.
- Abraham Lincoln
I like a man who grins when he fights.
- Winston Churchill
I want to be the white man's brother, not his brother-in-law.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Adventure is not outside man; it is within.
- George Eliot
A clever man commits no minor blunders.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
One man's "magic" is another man's engineering.
"Supernatural" is a null word.
- Robert A. Heinlein
Man's nature is not essentially evil.
Brute nature has been known to
yield to the influence of love.
You must never despair of human nature.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
I don't advise a haircut, man.
All hairdressers are in the employment of the government.
Hairs are your aerials.
They pick up signals from the cosmos,
and transmit them directly into the brain.
This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight.
- the movie Withnail & I
It appears to be a law that you cannot have
a deep sympathy with both man and nature.
- Henry David Thoreau
Every man prefers belief to the exercise of judgment.
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca
The civilized man has built a coach,
but has lost the use of his feet.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Too often the strong, silent man is silent only because
he does not know what to say, and is reputed strong
only because he has remained silent.
- Winston Churchill
A benevolent man should allow a few faults in himself,
to keep his friends in countenance.
- Benjamin Franklin
A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers,
looks around for a coffin.
- H. L. Mencken
The man who can smile when things go wrong
has thought of someone else he can blame it on.
- Robert Bloch
Man's role is uncertain, undefined, and perhaps unnecessary.
- Margaret Mead
Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say,
abstains from giving us wordy evidence of the fact.
- George Eliot
I choose my friends for their good looks,
my acquaintances for their good characters,
and my enemies for their intellects.
A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
- Oscar Wilde
A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother
why the bride changed her mind.
What do you mean? responded her mother.
Well, she went down the aisle with one man,
and came back with another.
- Anonymous
Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller
The man of science is a poor philosopher.
- Albert Einstein
Confused Memories of Childhood:
Hate to my father, cruel hate,
confused with love - a mix not great.
The man I love - the man I hate;
the man I want to emulate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I will far rather see the race of man extinct
than that we should become less than beasts
by making the noblest of God's creation,
woman, the object of our lust.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
The man who does not read good books
has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
- Mark Twain
Show me a sane man, and I will cure him for you.
- Carl Jung
If it keeps up, man will atrophy
all his limbs but the push-button finger.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man,
and I hate people like that!
- Tom Lehrer
Many a man owes his success to his first wife
and his second wife to his success.
- Jim Backus
Man is a credulous animal, and must believe something;
in the absence of good grounds for belief,
he will be satisfied with bad ones.
- Bertrand Russell
A man can't be too careful in the choice of enemies.
- Oscar Wilde
Clothes make the man.
Naked people have little or no influence on society.
- Mark Twain
Never give a sword to a man who can't dance.
- Confucius
The savage in man is never quite eradicated.
- Henry David Thoreau
We are born believing.
A man bears beliefs as a tree bears apples.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
I would rather trust a woman's instinct than a man's reason.
- Stanley Baldwin
A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything
and the value of nothing.
- Oscar Wilde
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.