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Let these funny Diffuses Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Memory diffuses fact.
- Diane Sawyer
Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory.
- Albert Schweitzer
It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read books of quotations...
The quotations, when engraved upon the memory, give you good thoughts.
They also make you anxious to read the authors and look for more.
- Winston Churchill
A life rooted deeply lives and grows in memory.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
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Death leaves a heartache no one can heal,
love leaves a memory no one can steal.
- From a headstone in Ireland
A life, deeply rooted, lives and grows in memory.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
When we lose one we love,
our bitterest tears are called forth
by the memory of hours when we loved not enough.
- Maurice Maeterlinck
Memory is deceptive because it is colored by today's events.
- Albert Einstein
Every goodbye is the birth of a memory.
- Dutch Proverb
You can't go home again because home has ceased to exist
except in the mothballs of memory.
- John Steinbeck (Travels With Charley)
Anyone who conducts an argument by appealing to authority
is not using his intelligence; he is just using his memory.
- Leonardo da Vinci
So long as the memory of certain
beloved friends lives in my heart,
I shall say that life is good.
- Helen Keller
The timeless in you is aware of life's timelessness;
and knows that yesterday is but today's memory
and tomorrow is today's dream.
- Khalil Gibran
Many a man fails as an original thinker
simply because his memory is too good.
- Nietzsche
A friend knows the song in my heart
and sings it to me when my memory fails.
- Donna Roberts
No man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar.
- Abraham Lincoln
Gratitude is the memory of the heart.
- Jean Baptiste Massieu
There is a magic in the memory of schoolboy friendships;
it softens the heart,
and even affects the nervous system
of those who have no heart.
- Benjamin Disraeli
Release your burdens - your fears, regrets,
guilts, shames, embarrassments, angers.
One by one, pick up each memory or fear that troubles you,
hold it close, and release it to the Universe.
Release each incident from your past that still bothers you.
Release each fear - your fears about your health,
your family, your job, and every other fear.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Have a talk with your mind
(it really is something separate from yourself).
Lay down the law.
"My life begins TODAY.
I am like a newborn.
I have what I have today;
I have my fingers, my toes,
some people in my life,
some material and financial state.
Yesterday is only a dream -
perhaps a nightmare,
perhaps a cherished memory,
but only a dream - nothing more.
I will make all decisions and actions based solely
on what I have today as a starting point."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Living in the present moment requires discretion toward memory.
Without memory we'd have amnesia. What good would there be in that?
Offer discretion and discernment for our past
with a broad spectrum of forgiveness.
As for our present moment, delight.
And dedication to remain fully present to all the possibility.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Man can never know the kind of loneliness a woman knows.
Man lies in a woman's womb only to gather strength,
he nourishes himself from this fusion,
and then he rises and goes into the world,
into his work, into battle, into art.
He is not lonely. He is busy.
The memory of the swim in amniotic fluid gives him energy, completion.
The woman may be busy too, but she feels empty.
Sensuality for her is not only a wave of pleasure
in which she has bathed,
and a charge of electric joy at contact with another.
When man lies in her womb, she is fulfilled,
each act of love a a taking of man within her,
an act of birth and rebirth, of child-bearing and man-bearing.
Man lies in her womb and is reborn each time anew
with a desire to act, to BE.
But for woman, the climax is not in the birth,
but in the moment the man rests inside of her.
- Anais Nin
I think one of the finest gifts I can give
my friends in the holiday season is to pause
with a long enough quality to actually SEE them.
My calm, unhurried presence communicates
this gift of a message, "I see you. I recognize you.
I remember our times of together
and am contributing right now to another quality memory.
I value you and honor and take the time,
right this moment to pause long enough to truly notice you."
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Alas! how little does the memory
of these human inhabitants
enhance the beauty of the landscape.
- Henry David Thoreau
Happiness is a figment of the imagination.
Imagine happiness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Joy is a choice - but it isn't an easy choice.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Happiness is the absence of the striving for happiness.
- Zhuangzi
Money won't make you happy...
but everybody wants to find out for themselves.
- Zig Ziglar
Happiness is a choice.
- Anonymous
This is your day to Laugh at Life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.
- Ogden Nash
Happiness depends upon ourselves.
- Aristotle
Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle,
and the life of the candle will not be shortened.
Happiness never decreases by being shared.
- The Buddha
Stay Happy, never let anyone get your goat.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring,
close-knit family in another city.
- George Burns
Simple living is the way to happy living.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
No one is in control of your happiness but you;
therefore, you have the power to change anything
about yourself or your life that you want to change.
- Barbara De Angelis
Some days are simply meant for playing.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Our Joy comes from living our own lives simply -
never from demanding that others live simply -
or from ever making any demands whatsoever upon others.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Sanity and happiness are an impossible combination.
- Mark Twain
What is happiness except the simple harmony
between a man and the life he leads?
- Albert Camus
Happiness blooms
in the presence of self-respect,
and the absence of ego.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I truly believe that happiness is possible...
even when you're thirty-three
and have a bottom the size of two bowling balls.
- the movie Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason
You don't have the power to make life "fair,"
but you do have the power to make life joyful.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It isn't what you have, or who you are, or where you are,
or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy.
It is what you think about.
- Dale Carnegie
Happiness is often the result of being too busy to be miserable.
- Anonymous
Laugh when you can,
apologize when you should,
and let go of what you can't change.
Life's too short to be anything... but happy.
- Anonymous
The only reason you suffer is because you choose to suffer.
The only reason you are happy is because you choose to be happy.
Happiness is a choice, and so is suffering.
- don Miguel Ruiz
If you want to be happy, be.
- Leo Tolstoy
No matter how dull, or how mean, or how wise a man is,
he feels that happiness is his indisputable right.
- Helen Keller
We all live with the objective of being happy;
our lives are all different and yet the same.
- Anne Frank
Some cause happiness wherever they go;
others whenever they go.
- Oscar Wilde
The purpose of our lives is to be happy.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama
Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile,
but sometimes your smile
can be the source of your joy.
- Thich Nhat Hanh
Happiness is the china shop; love is the bull.
- H. L. Mencken
Participate joyfully in the sorrows of the world.
We cannot cure the world of sorrows,
but we can choose to live in joy.
- Joseph Campbell
Create happiness for others.
- Dale Carnegie
My greatest service to others is living happily,
and radiating happiness and joy to those around me.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Happiness... consists in giving, and in serving others.
- Henry Drummond
There is no value in life except what you choose to place upon it
and no happiness in any place except what you bring to it yourself.
- Henry David Thoreau
Happiness is not the absence of problems,
but the willingness to deal with them joyfully.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The path to happiness is forgiveness of everyone
and gratitude for everything.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
My happiness depends on me.
- A Course in Miracles
The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy
is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet,
alone with the heavens, nature and God.
Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be.
- Anne Frank
Your greatest gift to others is to be happy
and to radiate your happiness to the entire world.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying
about things which are beyond the power of our will.
- Epictetus
If you have health, you probably will be happy,
and if you have health and happiness,
you have all the wealth you need, even if it is not all you want.
- Elbert Hubbard
Gain happiness by living in the present -
without regret for the past or fear of the future.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Gratitude is crucial to your happiness
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Those who won our independence...
valued liberty as an end and as a means.
They believed liberty to be the secret of happiness
and courage to be the secret of liberty.
- Louis D. Brandeis
No one has a right to consume happiness without producing it.
- Helen Keller
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.