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Let these funny Costs Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Money often costs too much.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
When you have to kill a man,
it costs nothing to be polite.
- Winston Churchill
Anything that costs you more hours of effort or worry
than it brings you hours of enjoyment
is a candidate for downsizing.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
There are risks and costs to action.
But they are far less than the long range
risks of comfortable inaction.
- John F. Kennedy
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There is no glory in battle worth the blood it costs.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
Victory at all costs, victory in spite of all terror,
victory however long and hard the road may be;
for without victory, there is no survival.
- Winston Churchill
To be admitted to Nature's hearth costs nothing.
None is excluded, but excludes himself.
You have only to push aside the curtain.
- Henry David Thoreau
It costs you nothing to make another happy -
and you gain your true self through the act of spreading joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I can make more generals, but horses cost money.
- Abraham Lincoln
The man who has won millions at the cost of his conscience is a failure.
- B. C. Forbes
The cost of freedom is always high,
but Americans have always paid it.
And one path we shall never choose,
and that is the path of surrender, or submission.
- John F. Kennedy
How much pain they have cost us,
the evils which have never happened.
- Thomas Jefferson
The cost of a thing is the amount
of what I will call life
which is required to be exchanged for it,
immediately or in the long run.
- Henry David Thoreau
If the children are untaught,
their ignorance and vices will in future life
cost us much dearer in their consequences
than it would have done in their
correction by a good education.
- Thomas Jefferson
We shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be,
we shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds,
we shall fight in the fields and in the streets,
we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender.
- Winston Churchill
You'll live to be a hundred if you give up
all the things that make you want to.
- the movie Interiors
You can put wings on a pig,
but you don't make it an eagle.
- William J. Clinton
New Yorkers love it when you spill your guts out there.
Spill your guts at Wimbledon and they make you stop and clean it up.
- Jimmy Carter
I don't want to move to a city where the only cultural advantage
is being able to make a right turn on a red light.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall
One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain
Go ahead, make my day.
- the movie Sudden Impact (1983)
I didn't make it all the way through third grade for nothing.
- the movie The Rescuers Down Under
You can lead a man to Congress,
but you can't make him think.
- Milton Berle
EVERYONE has the right to make an ass out of themselves.
- Harold and Maude (The movie )
You can't make an omelet without breaking eggs.
- Anonymous
Clear? Huh. Why a four-year-old child
could understand this report.
Run out and find me a four-year-old child,
I can't make head or tail of it.
- the Groucho Marx movie Duck Soup
Nothing makes the earth seem so spacious
as to have friends at a distance;
they make the latitudes and the longitudes.
- Henry David Thoreau
Am I not destroying my enemies
when I make friends of them?
- Abraham Lincoln
Gods always behave like the people who make them.
- Zora Neale Hurston
Creationists make it sound as though a "theory'
is something you dreamt up after being drunk all night.
- Isaac Asimov
How many legs does a dog have
if you call the tail a leg? Four.
Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg.
- Abraham Lincoln
The objection to Puritans is not that
they try to make us think as they do,
but that they try to make us do as they think.
- H. L. Mencken
If Hitler invaded hell
I would make at least a favorable reference
to the devil in the House of Commons.
- Winston Churchill
Clothes make the man.
Naked people have little or no influence on society.
- Mark Twain
Speak when you are angry -
and you will make the best speech you'll ever regret.
- Laurence J. Peter
Law of Contrariness:
Our chief want in life is somebody
who shall make us do what we can.
Having found them, we shall then hate them for it.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Human beings must have action;
and they will make it if they cannot find it.
- Albert Einstein
Lord, where we are wrong,
make us willing to change;
where we are right,
make us easy to live with.
- Peter Marshall
People who are wrapped up in themselves make small packages.
- Benjamin Franklin
The greatest mistake you can make in life
is to be continually fearing you will make one.
- Elbert Hubbard
If you want to make enemies,
try to change something.
- Woodrow Wilson
A positive attitude may not solve all your problems,
but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.
- Herm Albright
God doesn't make junk.
- Anonymous
We make our friends; we make our enemies;
but God makes our next-door neighbor.
- Gilbert (G. K.) Chesterton
Money won't make you happy...
but everybody wants to find out for themselves.
- Zig Ziglar
I always arrive late at the office,
but I make up for it by leaving early.
- Charles Lamb
I don't know, I don't care,
and it doesn't make any difference!
- Albert Einstein
Anyone who thinks sitting in church
can make you a Christian must also think
that sitting in a garage can make you a car.
- Garrison Keillor
You have to be a bastard to make it, and that's a fact.
And the Beatles are the biggest bastards on earth.
- John Lennon
I love deadlines.
I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.
- Douglas Adams
I never make stupid mistakes.
Only very, very clever ones.
- John Peel
It is a good thing for an uneducated man to read books of quotations...
The quotations, when engraved upon the memory, give you good thoughts.
They also make you anxious to read the authors and look for more.
- Winston Churchill
If you want to make peace with your enemy,
you have to work with your enemy.
Then he becomes your partner.
- Nelson Mandela
Curiosity takes courage.
The most important promises are the ones you make to yourself.
Pay Attention.
Appreciate. Listen. Imagine.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
If (s)he's an apple and you're an orange,
celebrate your differences -
make a great fruit salad.
Love isn't about being the same -
it's about being sweet with each other.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I make it a policy to try never to
make a complete idiot of myself twice in the same way.
After all, there's always all kinds of new ways
to make a complete idiot of myself.
Why repeat the old ones?
- Margot Dalton
You don't have the power to make life "fair,"
but you do have the power to make life joyful.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Love one another but make not a bond of love.
Let it rather be a moving sea
between the shores of your souls.
- Khalil Gibran
What we think, we become.
All that we are arises with our thoughts.
With our thoughts, we make the world.
- The Buddha
No amount of self-improvement can make up
for a lack of self-acceptance.
- Anonymous
Though no one can go back and make a brand new start,
anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.
- Carl Bard
I have found out that though the ways in which
I can make myself useful are few,
yet the work open to me is endless.
- Helen Keller
I seldom think about my limitations,
and they never make me sad.
Perhaps there is just a touch of yearning at times;
but it is vague, like a breeze among flowers.
- Helen Keller
Carpe diem! Rejoice while you are alive; enjoy the day;
live life to the fullest;
make the most of what you have.
It is later than you think.
- Horace
God has given you one face, and you make yourself another.
- William Shakespeare
The fastest way to destroy love
is to make a goal out of it,
because people who are trying to be loved
come from a place that they're not loved.
- Werner Erhard
Don't make assumptions.
- don Miguel Ruiz
Humans make illogical decisions.
- Spock (character in Star Trek movies and TV shows)
The goal of life is
to make your heartbeat match the beat of the universe,
to match your nature with Nature.
- Joseph Campbell
Well-behaved women seldom make history.
- Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
At the end of a matter ask,
"What will I learn from this to make me better?"
- Mary Anne Radmacher
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.