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Let these funny Eustace Budgell Quotes lighten up your life. And check out the humorous quotes of many more funny authors in my large collection.
Friendship is a strong and habitual inclination in two persons
to promote the good and happiness of one another.
- Eustace Budgell
From wine what sudden friendship springs.
- John Gay
No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous
The worst part of success is to try to find
someone who is happy for you.
- Bette Midler
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One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin
A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler
The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet
and steady and loyal and enduring a nature
that it will last through a whole lifetime,
if not asked to lend money.
- Mark Twain
Nothing is more cheerful than talking
about our friends' shortcomings.
- Mason Cooley
Everyone should have at least two friends -
one to talk to and one to talk about.
- Anonymous
Nothing makes the earth seem so spacious
as to have friends at a distance;
they make the latitudes and the longitudes.
- Henry David Thoreau
A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
- Erma Bombeck
A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend -
and he's a priest.
- Erma Bombeck
Nothing echoes like an empty mailbox.
- Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts
The feeling of friendship is like that
of being comfortably filled with roast beef;
love, like being enlivened with champagne.
- Samuel Johnson
A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail.
A best friend is the one sitting next
to you saying "boy was that fun."
- The Maugles
I have lost friends, some by death ...
others by sheer inability to cross the street.
- Virginia Woolf
A lifelong friend is someone
you haven't borrowed money from yet.
- Anonymous
Friendship is born at that moment
when one person says to another,
"What! You too? I thought I was the only one."
- C. S. Lewis 
Most people enjoy the inferiority of their best friends.
- Lord Chesterfield
Do not use a hatchet to remove
a fly from your friend's forehead.
- Chinese Proverb
We make our friends; we make our enemies;
but God makes our next-door neighbor.
- Gilbert (G. K.) Chesterton
I choose my friends for their good looks,
my acquaintances for their good characters,
and my enemies for their intellects.
A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
- Oscar Wilde
A loyal friend laughs at your jokes
when they're not so good,
and sympathizes with your problems
when they're not so bad.
- Arnold H. Glasgow
Money can't buy friends
but it can get you a better class of enemy.
- Spike Milligan
It is far better to be alone,
than to be in bad company.
- George Washington
My father and he had one of those English friendships
which begins by avoiding the intimacies
and eventually eliminates speech altogether.
- Jorge Luis Borges
Nobody can be uncheered with a balloon.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Marriage is a sort of friendship recognized by the police.
- Anonymous
He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.
- Oscar Wilde
Contrary to general belief,
I do not believe that friends are necessarily
the people you like best,
they are merely the people who got there first.
- Peter Ustinov
I'm a very loyal and unreliable friend.
- Bono
Distance cannot matter - ours is a friendship of the heart.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
A true friend stabs you in the front.
- Oscar Wilde
A true friend is one who
overlooks your failures
and tolerates your success.
- Doug Larson
"Appeasement" is the policy of feeding your friends to a crocodile,
one at a time, in hopes that the crocodile will eat you last.
- Franklin D. Roosevelt
A benevolent man should allow a few faults in himself,
to keep his friends in countenance.
- Benjamin Franklin
I never considered a difference of opinion
in politics, in religion, in philosophy,
as cause for withdrawing from a friend.
- Thomas Jefferson
No man stands so tall as when he stoops to help a child.
- Anonymous (often attributed to Abraham Lincoln)
To the people who love you,
you are beautiful already.
This is not because they're
blind to your shortcomings
but because they so clearly see your soul.
- Victoria Moran
I have lost my seven best friends,
which is to say that God has had mercy on me
seven times without realizing it.
He lent a friendship, took it from me, and sent me another.
- Jean Cocteau
It is the friends you can call up at 4 A.M. that matter.
- Marlene Dietrich
A friend is someone who knows all about you,
and loves you just the same.
- Elbert Hubbard
Give Honest and Sincere Appreciation.
- Dale Carnegie
Thy friendship oft has made my heart to ache;
do be my enemy - for friendship's sake.
- William Blake
A true friend is someone who
thinks that you are a good egg
even though he knows that
you are slightly cracked.
- Bernard Meltzer
Love me when I least deserve it,
because that's when I really need it.
- Swedish Proverb
True friendship's laws are by this rule express'd,
Welcome the coming, speed the parting guest.
- Alexander Pope
True friendship is like sound health;
the value of it is seldom known until it be lost.
- Charles Caleb Colton
A happy family is but an earlier heaven.
- George Bernard Shaw
Best Friends: we're a parade - even by ourselves!
- Mary Anne Radmacher
True friendship is never serene.
- Marquise de Sevigne
"How do you spell 'love'?" asked Piglet.
"You don't spell it...you feel it." answered Pooh.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
True friendship is a plant of slow growth,
and must undergo and withstand the shocks of adversity
before it is entitled to the appellation.
- George Washington
Laughter is not at all a bad beginning for a friendship,
and it is far the best ending for one.
- Oscar Wilde
One measure of friendship consists
not in the number of things friends can discuss,
but in the number of things they need no longer mention.
- Clifton Fadiman
Friendship that flows from the heart
cannot be frozen by adversity,
as the water that flows from the spring
cannot congeal in winter.
- James Fenimore Cooper
A person isn't who they are during
the last conversation you had with them -
they're who they've been
throughout your whole relationship.
- Rainer Maria Rilke
Friendship, like the immortality of the soul,
is too good to be believed.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
I have three kinds of friends:
those who love me,
those who pay no attention to me,
and those who detest me.
- Nicolas De Chamfort
Each relationship nurtures a strength or weakness within you.
- Mike Murdock
Love is a friendship set to music.
- Joseph Campbell
You can't stay in your corner of the Forest waiting for others to come to you.
You have to go to them sometimes.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Fame is the scentless sunflower, with gaudy crown of gold;
But friendship is the breathing rose, with sweets in every fold.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
The easiest kind of friendship for me
is with ten thousand people.
The hardest is with one.
- Joan Baez
If there ever comes a day when we can't be together,
keep me in your heart, I'll stay there forever.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Friendship is like money, easier made than kept.
- Samuel Butler
No distance of place or lapse of time can lessen the friendship
of those who are thoroughly persuaded of each other's worth.
- Robert Southey
No love, no friendship can cross the path of our destiny
without leaving some mark on it forever.
- Francois Muriac
Peace, commerce and honest friendship with all nations;
entangling alliances with none.
- Thomas Jefferson
In true friendship, one can express
anything and everything without feeling ashamed
or afraid of being rejected.
- Aparna Chatterjee
Tis the privilege of friendship to talk nonsense,
and have her nonsense respected.
- Charles Lamb
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.