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Let these funny Usually Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway
is usually a poor judge of distance.
- Laurence J. Peter
Politicians and diapers need to be changed regularly,
usually for the same reason.
- Anonymous
A man is usually more careful of his money
than he is of his principles.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
What one has to do usually can be done.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
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Opportunities are usually disguised as hard work,
so most people don't recognize them.
- Ann Landers
Don't take it personally -
it's not usually about you.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Success usually comes to those
who are too busy to be looking for it.
- Henry David Thoreau
Trust your hunches. They're usually based on facts
filed away just below the conscious level.
- Joyce Brothers
When you ask the wrong question,
you usually get a nonsense answer.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It is usually the imagination that is wounded first,
rather than the heart; it being much more sensitive.
- Henry David Thoreau
Each of us is burdened by an unlimited number of
expectations (demands) that we hold for the actions of others.
We "know" that there is a right way to do things,
and are often outraged when our expectations are not met.
Usually, we are unaware that we merely
have a strong opinion and point-of-view,
and are sure that we know how everything is supposed to be.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The best morale exist when you never hear the word mentioned.
When you hear a lot of talk about it, it's usually lousy.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
The path to your own happiness is usually found in service.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Great achievement is usually born of great sacrifice,
and is never the result of selfishness.
- Napoleon Hill
What usually happens in the educational process is
that the faculties are dulled, overloaded, stuffed
and paralyzed so that by the time most people are mature
they have lost their innate capabilities.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
Often, we get stuck on a question
for which we can't find an acceptable answer.
That is a good time to consider asking a different question.
Every question is based on some assumptions -
usually invisible assumptions that we don't see, unless we go looking.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Parents are usually more careful to bestow knowledge
on their children rather than virtue,
the art of speaking well rather than doing well;
but their manners should be of the greatest concern.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
It really does matter when we tell even the slightest untruth.
Even something as well intentioned as
telling someone their ill-finished
hair style looks wonderful will backfire -
certainly karmically, and usually practically.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
We all should choose our friends carefully.
I used to think that no one could know me better than somebody else,
because you're inside yourself, your body, you can't see yourself.
If you think like that, you surround yourself with
other people who are willing to tell you who you are,
which are usually judgmental people ...
we should really surround ourselves with the ones
that adore us and believe in the highest of us.
- Jewel
My ideas usually come not at my desk writing
but in the midst of living.
- Anais Nin
As usual, there is a great woman behind every idiot.
- John Lennon
Conversations with God are very different
from the usual nature of prayer.
Prayers are commonly only in one direction -
the one praying speaks and hopes God is listening.
Prayers also tend to focus on asking
for specific things or outcomes one wants,
rather than seeking to better understand the mind of God.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
This overcoming of all the usual barriers
between the individual and the Absolute
is the great mystic achievement.
In mystic states we both become one with the Absolute
and we become aware of our oneness.
This is the everlasting and triumphant mystical tradition,
hardly altered by differences of clime or creed.
- William James
I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
One great thing about getting old is that
you can get out of all sorts of social obligations
just by saying you're too tired.
- George Carlin
You ask me if I keep a notebook
to record my great ideas.
I've only ever had one.
- Albert Einstein
It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous
Hey, Marge. Isn't it great being married
to someone who's recklessly impulsive?
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)
I am prepared to meet my Maker.
Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal
of meeting me is another matter.
- Winston Churchill
We have a great life here in Alaska,
and we're never going back to America again!
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)
The time-traveling is just too dangerous.
Better that I devote myself to study
the other great mystery of the universe - women!
- the movie Back to the Future II
Confused Memories of Childhood:
Hate to my father, cruel hate,
confused with love - a mix not great.
The man I love - the man I hate;
the man I want to emulate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Who in the world am I? Ah, that's the great puzzle.
- Lewis Carroll
I have great hopes that we shall love each other all our lives
as much as if we had never married at all.
- Lord Byron
To the young child, all life is a great adventure -
when did we grow so dull and brittle.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
People who think they know everything
are a great annoyance to those of us who do.
- Isaac Asimov
I begin with the principle that all men are bores.
Surely no one will prove himself
so great a bore as to contradict me in this.
- Soren Kierkegaard
I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner
No one can have a higher opinion of you than I have,
and I think you're a slimy, contemptible sewer rat!
- the movie The Great Mouse Detective
I always seem to get inspiration and renewed vitality
by contact with this great novel land of yours
which sticks up out of the Atlantic.
- Winston Churchill
New York City is a great monument
to the power of money and greed...
a race for rent.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
The essence of life is not in
the great victories and grand failures,
but in the simple joys.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If (s)he's an apple and you're an orange,
celebrate your differences -
make a great fruit salad.
Love isn't about being the same -
it's about being sweet with each other.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The magic words for a great relationship are,
"I love you just the way you are."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Silence is a source of great strength.
- Lao Tzu
Where there is great love,
there are always miracles.
- Willa Cather
I have a great deal of company in the house,
especially in the morning when nobody calls.
- Henry David Thoreau
The great end of life is not knowledge but action.
- Thomas Henry Huxley
Having a personal opinion is great.
Believing that one's personal opinion is absolute truth
leads to most of the world's troubles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Dare to dream of your great success.
Become intimate with those things
which deeply motivate you
and regularly work toward
the realization of that mission.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Great minds discuss ideas;
average minds discuss events;
small minds discuss people.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
If a man is called to be a street sweeper,
he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted,
or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry.
He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts
of heaven and earth will pause to say,
here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
You're off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting,
So... get on your way!
- Dr. Seuss
Life in abundance comes only through great love.
- Elbert Hubbard
In great contests, each party claims to act
in accordance with the will of God.
Both may be, and one must be wrong.
- Abraham Lincoln
Neither a man nor a crowd nor a nation
can be trusted to act humanely
or to think sanely under the influence of a great fear.
- Bertrand Russell
Regrets and resentments cause great suffering but fix nothing.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is a great big canvas,
and you should throw all the paint you can on it.
- Danny Kaye
To be one, to be united is a great thing.
But to respect the right to be different is maybe even greater.
- Bono
Don't be afraid to give up the good to go for the great.
- John D. Rockefeller
Dare to dream of your great success.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Mostly, it is human to dislike surprises -
often with great intensity.
Be open to new ways;
sometimes newness just knocks on our door;
welcome it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I long to accomplish a great and noble task,
but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks
as if they were great and noble.
- Helen Keller
It gives me great pleasure indeed to see the stubbornness
of an incorrigible nonconformist warmly acclaimed.
- Albert Einstein
No crime is so great as daring to excel.
- Winston Churchill
One of the surest ways to cause
yourself great suffering
is to insist upon being right -
to demand that all others view life
exactly as you view it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
There is a great future in front of you,
you can leave your past behind.
- Joel Osteen
Being is the great explainer.
- Henry David Thoreau
All difficult things have
their origin in that which is easy,
and great things in that which is small.
- Lao Tzu
Forgiving is not a gift to someone else.
Forgiving is your gift to yourself -
a great gift - the gift of happiness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
In principle, the great religions of the world
do not differ as much as they appear to.
- Ernest Holmes
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.