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Let these funny Making Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.
- John Lennon
There are two things that are more difficult
than making an after-dinner speech:
climbing a wall which is leaning toward you
and kissing a girl who is leaning away from you.
- Winston Churchill
This is my ultimate fantasy:
watching QVC with a credit card
while making love and eating at the same time.
- Yasmine Bleeth
I will far rather see the race of man extinct
than that we should become less than beasts
by making the noblest of God's creation,
woman, the object of our lust.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
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Most of what we call management consists of
making it difficult for people to get their work done.
- Peter F. Drucker
Our Joy comes from living our own lives simply -
never from demanding that others live simply -
or from ever making any demands whatsoever upon others.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is really simple,
but we insist on making it complicated.
- Confucius
The art of acceptance is the art of making someone
who has just done you a small favor
wish that he might have done you a greater one.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
If you fear making anyone mad,
then you ultimately probe for
the lowest common denominator of human achievement.
- Jimmy Carter
One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light,
but by making the darkness conscious.
- Carl Jung
The secret of making dreams come true
can be summarized in four C's.
They are Curiosity, Confidence, Courage, and Constancy;
and the greatest of these is Confidence.
- Walt Disney
Now we have a problem in making our power credible,
and Vietnam is the place.
- John F. Kennedy
The secret of success is making your vocation your vacation.
- Mark Twain
Inspiration is God making contact with itself.
- Ram Dass
Ninety-nine percent of the failures
come from people who have the habit of making excuses.
- George Washington Carver
Well-being is making its way to you at all times.
If you will relax and find a way to allow it,
it will be your experience.
- Abraham (Esther Hicks)
There is only one way... to get anybody to do anything.
And that is by making the other person want to do it.
- Dale Carnegie
The key to happiness is having dreams.
The key to success is making your dreams come true.
- Anonymous
What are you committed to?
Have you started, or are you still thinking about it -
and making excuses?
Do you work toward your goal each day?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The world you see has nothing to do with reality.
It is of your own making and does not exist.
- A Course In Miracles
It is against everything we stand for to take a human life.
Making an exception to that code is a bleak thing.
- Sam, from Twilight saga by Stephenie Meyer
Just smiling goes a long way toward
making you feel better about life.
And when you feel better about life, your life is better.
- Art Linkletter
An eye for eye only ends up making the whole world blind.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
You should never be content with so little,
when you can reach out for something big.
- Charles L. Allen
(This quote is about making a big difference
in the world - not about greed)
The problem with making assumptions
is that we believe they are the truth
- don Miguel Ruiz
Love is not a matter of counting the years,
but making the years count.
- Michele St. Amand
If your home is not a place where you can truly
kick-back and be yourself - both physically and emotionally -
consider making some changes in your way-of-life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
In Iroquois society, leaders are encouraged to
remember seven generations in the past and
consider seven generations in the future
when making decisions that affect the people.
- Wilma Mankiller
The making of friends, who are real friends,
is the best token we have of a man's success in life.
- Edward Everett Hale
I take every opportunity to articulate to others
the ways that they have blessed and influenced me.
I hold sweet memories of making the opportunity
to thank teachers who have influenced me.
I encourage everyone to seize opportunities
to tell people who have made a gift of knowledge or influence.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Consider a parent who says,
"Look at the sacrifices I'm making so you can have a better life."
Contrast that with another parent who demonstrates
living a great life every day.
Self-sacrifice is not a virtue.
Living a great life and sharing that life with others
is the noble way to live.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I love you not only for what you are,
but for what I am when I am with you.
I love you not only for what you have made of yourself,
but for what you are making of me.
I love you for that part of me you bring out.
- Roy Croft
If a man walks in the woods for love of them half of each day,
he is in danger of being regarded as a loafer.
But if he spends his days as a speculator,
shearing off those woods and making the earth bald before her time,
he is deemed an industrious and enterprising citizen.
- Henry David Thoreau
I made no resolutions for the New Year.
The habit of making plans, of criticizing, sanctioning
and molding my life, is too much of a daily event for me.
- Anais Nin
I love fools' experiments.
I am always making them.
- Charles Darwin
The basic thing nobody asks is
why do people take drugs of any sort?
Why do we have these accessories to normal living to live?
I mean, is there something wrong with society
that's making us so pressurized,
that we cannot live without guarding ourselves against it?
- John Lennon
You can't make an omelet without breaking eggs.
- Anonymous
You can lead a man to Congress,
but you can't make him think.
- Milton Berle
You can put wings on a pig,
but you don't make it an eagle.
- William J. Clinton
Nothing makes the earth seem so spacious
as to have friends at a distance;
they make the latitudes and the longitudes.
- Henry David Thoreau
One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain
You'll live to be a hundred if you give up
all the things that make you want to.
- the movie Interiors
I don't want to move to a city where the only cultural advantage
is being able to make a right turn on a red light.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall
I didn't make it all the way through third grade for nothing.
- the movie The Rescuers Down Under
Clear? Huh. Why a four-year-old child
could understand this report.
Run out and find me a four-year-old child,
I can't make head or tail of it.
- the Groucho Marx movie Duck Soup
Go ahead, make my day.
- the movie Sudden Impact (1983)
EVERYONE has the right to make an ass out of themselves.
- Harold and Maude (The movie )
New Yorkers love it when you spill your guts out there.
Spill your guts at Wimbledon and they make you stop and clean it up.
- Jimmy Carter
We make our friends; we make our enemies;
but God makes our next-door neighbor.
- Gilbert (G. K.) Chesterton
Money won't make you happy...
but everybody wants to find out for themselves.
- Zig Ziglar
If you want to make enemies,
try to change something.
- Woodrow Wilson
Gods always behave like the people who make them.
- Zora Neale Hurston
Anyone who thinks sitting in church
can make you a Christian must also think
that sitting in a garage can make you a car.
- Garrison Keillor
If Hitler invaded hell
I would make at least a favorable reference
to the devil in the House of Commons.
- Winston Churchill
I love deadlines.
I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.
- Douglas Adams
The greatest mistake you can make in life
is to be continually fearing you will make one.
- Elbert Hubbard
Speak when you are angry -
and you will make the best speech you'll ever regret.
- Laurence J. Peter
People who are wrapped up in themselves make small packages.
- Benjamin Franklin
The objection to Puritans is not that
they try to make us think as they do,
but that they try to make us do as they think.
- H. L. Mencken
God doesn't make junk.
- Anonymous
I can make more generals, but horses cost money.
- Abraham Lincoln
I always arrive late at the office,
but I make up for it by leaving early.
- Charles Lamb
How many legs does a dog have
if you call the tail a leg? Four.
Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg.
- Abraham Lincoln
A positive attitude may not solve all your problems,
but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.
- Herm Albright
I don't know, I don't care,
and it doesn't make any difference!
- Albert Einstein
Lord, where we are wrong,
make us willing to change;
where we are right,
make us easy to live with.
- Peter Marshall
Human beings must have action;
and they will make it if they cannot find it.
- Albert Einstein
You have to be a bastard to make it, and that's a fact.
And the Beatles are the biggest bastards on earth.
- John Lennon
Clothes make the man.
Naked people have little or no influence on society.
- Mark Twain
Creationists make it sound as though a "theory'
is something you dreamt up after being drunk all night.
- Isaac Asimov
Law of Contrariness:
Our chief want in life is somebody
who shall make us do what we can.
Having found them, we shall then hate them for it.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.