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Let these funny Commandments Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?"
Jesus replied:
"'Love the Lord your God with all your heart
and with all your soul and with all your mind.'
This is the first and greatest commandment.
And the second is like it:
'Love your neighbor as yourself.'
All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."
- Matthew 22:36-40
You shall not covet your neighbor's house;
you shall not covet your neighbor's wife,
nor his male servant, nor his female servant,
nor his ox, nor his donkey, nor anything that is your neighbor's.
- Exodus 20:17
Experience is a hard teacher.
She gives the test first
and the lessons afterwards.
- Anonymous
I've learned that mistakes can often be
as good a teacher as success.
- Jack Welch
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A worker in the rural reconstruction must have:
The body of an athlete
The attitude of a teacher
The mind of a scientist
The heart of a missionary
The spirit of a crusader.
- Jimmy Yen
When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.
- Buddhist Proverb
In the practice of tolerance,
one's enemy is the best teacher.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama
The mediocre teacher tells.
The good teacher explains.
The superior teacher demonstrates.
The great teacher inspires.
- William Arthur Ward
Love is a better teacher than duty.
- Albert Einstein
Experience is the best teacher.
- Proverb
In this outward and physical ceremony,
we attest once again to the inner
and spiritual strength of our Nation.
As my high school teacher, Miss Julia Coleman, used to say:
"We must adjust to changing times,
and still hold to unchanging principles."
- Jimmy Carter
Time to Die:
A Zen teacher had a rare and priceless teacup.
One day, his precocious student accidentally broke the cup.
Hearing the footsteps of his teacher,
the student held the pieces of the cup behind his back.
When the master appeared, he asked: "Why do people have to die?"
"This is natural," explained the teacher.
"Everything has to die and has just so long to live."
The student showed the shattered cup, saying,
"It was time for your cup to die."
- Traditional Zen Koan
What a blind person needs is not a teacher but another self.
- Helen Keller
It is the supreme art of the teacher to awaken joy
in creative expression and knowledge.
- Albert Einstein
Self-respect is often mistaken for arrogance
when in reality it is the opposite.
When we can recognize all our good qualities
as well as or faults with neutrality,
we can start to appreciate ourselves
as we would a dear friend
and experience the comfortable inner glow of respect.
To embrace the journey towards our full potential
we need to become our own loving teacher and coach.
Spurring ourselves on to become better human beings,
we develop true regard for ourselves,
and our life will become sacred.
- Osho
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
- Samuel Johnson [also attributed to Oscar Wilde]
I've always believed that if done properly,
armed robbery doesn't have to be an unpleasant experience.
- the movie Thelma & Louise
What this country needs is a credit card for
charging things to experience.
- Tom Wilson
Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes.
- Oscar Wilde
Choose to be as a young child -
fully awake, eager for the next experience.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want.
- Dan Stanford
It has been my experience that folks who
have no vices, have very few virtues.
- Abraham Lincoln
Experience keeps a dear school,
but fools will learn in no other.
- Benjamin Franklin
Fully experience THIS moment -
breathe in, breathe out - nothing more.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Only through experience of trial and suffering
can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared,
ambition inspired, and success achieved.
- Helen Keller
I'm not a genius.
I'm just a tremendous bundle of experience.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
For everything I observe or experience,
I create a story - not sometimes, but always.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Experience is not what happens to a man.
It is what a man does with what happens to him.
- Aldous Huxley
Good judgement comes from experience.
Experience comes from bad judgement.
- Jim Horning
Forgiveness ... is the finishing of old business
that allows us to experience the present,
free of contamination from the past.
- Joan Borysenko
Other people do not have to change
for us to experience peace of mind.
- Gerald Jampolsky
I don't believe people are looking for the meaning of life
as much as they are looking for the experience of being alive.
- Joseph Campbell
Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed.
Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute
with love, grace, and gratitude.
- Denis Waitley
Unwearied ceaseless effort is the price that must be paid
for turning faith into a rich infallible experience.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
I don't have to have faith, I have experience.
- Joseph Campbell
I left the "eye for an eye" God
when I walked out of Bible school,
but God Within is a daily part of my personal experience.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The only source of knowledge is experience.
- Albert Einstein
We deem those happy, who from the experience of life
have learnt to bear its ills without being overcome by them.
- Carl Jung
If you wish to experience peace,
provide peace for another.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama
One is taught by experience to put a premium
on those few people who can appreciate you for what you are.
- Gail Godwin
Follow that will and that way
which experience confirms to be your own.
- Carl Jung
We are not human beings having a spiritual experience.
We are spiritual beings having a human experience.
- Pierre Teilhard de Chardin
When people speak to you about a preventive war,
you tell them to go fight it.
After my experience, I have come to hate war.
War settles nothing.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
Heaven is within us, and we experience it
to the degree that we become conscious of it.
- Ernest Holmes
Even the truth, when believed, is a lie.
You must experience the truth, not believe it.
- Werner Erhard
If what Proust says is true,
that happiness is the absence of fever,
then I will never know happiness.
For I am possessed by a fever
for knowledge, experience, and creation.
- Anais Nin
Never, never and never again shall it be
that this beautiful land will again experience
the oppression of one by another.
- Nelson Mandela
Security is mostly a superstition.
It does not exist in nature,
nor do the children of men as a whole experience it.
Avoiding danger is no safer
in the long run than outright exposure.
Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing.
- Helen Keller
What I recognized is that you can't put it together.
It's already together, and what you have to do
is experience it being together.
- Werner Erhard
Learn to become still. And to take your attention
away from what you don't want, and all the emotional charge around it,
and place your attention on what you wish to experience.
- Michael Beckwith
It is important to expect nothing,
to take every experience,
including the negative ones,
as merely steps on the path,
and to proceed.
- Ram Dass
The most permanent lessons in morals are those which come,
not of booky teaching, but of experience.
- Mark Twain
A mind that is stretched by a new experience
an never go back to its old dimensions.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
Never "for the sake of peace and quiet"
deny your own experience or convictions.
- Dag Hammarskjold
People grow through experience
if they meet life honestly and courageously.
This is how character is built.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Gratitude bestows reverence, allowing us to encounter
everyday epiphanies, those transcendent moments of awe
that change forever how we experience life and the world.
- John Milton
I believe that anyone can conquer fear
by doing the things he fears to do,
provided he keeps doing them until he gets
a record of successful experience behind him.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
He who is persistent will realize God.
So try your best to make meditation
a regular experience in your life.
- Paramahansa Yogananda
Story is a sacred visualization,
a way of echoing experience.
- Terry Tempest Williams
Experience life in all possible ways -
good-bad, bitter-sweet, dark-light, summer-winter.
Experience all the dualities.
Don't be afraid of experience,
because the more experience you have,
the more mature you become.
- Osho
Every thought has a consequence.
And every experience has a causative thought behind it.
- Ernest Holmes
True learning is not about facts,
but about conscious appreciation
of the experience of living.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Experience hath shown, that even
under the best forms of government,
those entrusted with power have,
in time, and by slow operations,
perverted it into tyranny.
- Thomas Jefferson
Wealth is the ability to fully experience life.
- Henry David Thoreau
If money is your hope for independence,
you will never have it.
The only real security that
a man can have in this world
is a reserve of knowledge,
experience and ability.
- Henry Ford
You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience
in which you really stop to look fear in the face.
You must do the thing which you think you cannot do.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
We Learn...
10% of what we read,
20% of what we hear,
30% of what we see,
50% of what we see and hear,
70% of what we discuss,
80% of what we experience,
95% of what we teach others.
- William Glasser
Well-being is making its way to you at all times.
If you will relax and find a way to allow it,
it will be your experience.
- Abraham (Esther Hicks)
Only those who have learned the power
of sincere and selfless contribution
experience life's deepest joy: true fulfillment.
- Tony Robbins
It was the experience of mystery -
even if mixed with fear -
that engendered religion.
- Albert Einstein
Experience demands that man is
the only animal which devours his own kind,
for I can apply no milder term to
the general prey of the rich on the poor.
- Thomas Jefferson
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.