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Let these funny Throat Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
AUM, the most primordial human sound -
and the sound most connected to Spirit,
is pronounced in these three parts:
A (as in mama) - a throat sound
that vibrates in the abdomen - signifies waking.
U (as in who) - a tongue sound
that vibrates in the chest - signifies dreaming.
M (as in mama) - a lip sound
that vibrates in the head - signifies sleeping.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The shepherd drives the wolf from the sheep's throat,
for which the sheep thanks the shepherd as a liberator,
while the wolf denounces him for the same act
as the destroyer of liberty,
especially as the sheep was a black one.
Plainly the sheep and the wolf are not agreed
upon a definition of the word liberty;
and precisely the same difference
prevails today among us human creatures
- Abraham Lincoln
Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
and I'm not sure about the universe.
- Albert Einstein
The savage in man is never quite eradicated.
- Henry David Thoreau
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The most difficult thing in the world
is to know how to do a thing
and to watch somebody else doing it wrong,
without comment.
- Theodore. H. White
I'm not used to feeling so human.
Is it always like this?
- Edward, from Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer
I'm sure we all agree that we ought to love one another
and I know there are people in the world
that do not love their fellow human beings
and I HATE people like that.
- Tom Lehrer
The natural cause of the human mind
is certainly from credulity to skepticism.
- Thomas Jefferson
Morality is the theory that every human act
must be either right or wrong,
and that 99 % of them are wrong.
- H. L. Mencken
Human beings are the only creatures on the planet
who tell time and think they have to earn a living.
- Buckminster Fuller
Only two things are infinite,
the universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein
One of the greatest pains to human nature is the pain of a new idea.
- Walter Bagehot
Science may have found a cure for most evils;
but it has found no remedy for the worst of them all -
the apathy of human beings.
- Helen Keller
Human beings must have action;
and they will make it if they cannot find it.
- Albert Einstein
Human salvation lies in the hands
of the creatively maladjusted.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Man's nature is not essentially evil.
Brute nature has been known to
yield to the influence of love.
You must never despair of human nature.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
The end of the human race will be that
it will eventually die of civilization.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The very essence of instinct is that
it's followed independently of reason.
- Charles Darwin
The more laws and order are made prominent,
the more thieves and robbers there will be.
- Lao Tzu
Since boredom advances and boredom is the root of all evil,
no wonder, then, that the world goes backwards, that evil spreads.
This can be traced back to the very beginning of the world.
The gods were bored; therefore they created human beings.
- Soren Kierkegaard
Our honorable and worthy ancestors knew that the world was flat,
motionless, and the center of the universe.
They knew the human body could not withstand
the forces of traveling faster than 19 mph.
They knew that the way to salvation was
exorcising witches and slaying non-believers.
They knew that it was a mortal sin to marry
someone of a different skin color.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
There are only two or three human stories,
and they go on repeating themselves as fiercely
as if they had never happened before.
- Willa Cather
Mostly, it is human to dislike surprises -
often with great intensity.
Be open to new ways;
sometimes newness just knocks on our door;
welcome it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Every human life contains a potential,
if that potential is not fulfilled,
then that life was wasted...
- Carl Jung
Each man is afraid of his neighbor's disapproval -
a thing which, to the general run of the human race,
is more dreaded than wolves and death.
- Mark Twain
In the arena of human life,
the honors and rewards fall to those
who show their good qualities in action.
- Aristotle
Our problems are man-made, therefore they may be solved by man.
And man can be as big as he wants.
No problem of human destiny is beyond human beings.
- John F. Kennedy
Bodily decay is gloomy in prospect,
but of all human contemplations,
the most abhorrent is body without mind.
- Thomas Jefferson
The human mind treats a new idea the way the body
treats a strange protein; it rejects it.
- Peter Medawar
The human spirit ranges across a truly amazing
diversity of experiences and emotions -
the highest peaks and the lowest valleys.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If you fear making anyone mad,
then you ultimately probe for
the lowest common denominator of human achievement.
- Jimmy Carter
Sometimes, indeed, there is such a discrepancy
between the genius and his human qualities
that one has to ask oneself whether
a little less talent might not have been better.
- Carl Jung
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.
- Robert A. Heinlein
As human beings, our greatness lies
not so much in being able to remake the world -
as in being able to remake ourselves.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
The human mind is our fundamental resource.
- John F. Kennedy
The purpose of human life is to serve,
and to show compassion and the will to help others.
- Albert Schweitzer
In human intercourse the tragedy begins,
not when there is misunderstanding about words,
but when silence is not understood.
- Henry David Thoreau
NO ONE is really different;
each of us is actually a member of the human race.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Being angry is as close as a human being
can come to experiencing hell on earth.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If you were a warrior,
you would know that the worst thing
one can do is confront human beings directly.
- Carlos Castaneda
Human nature is potentially aggressive and destructive
and potentially orderly and constructive.
- Margaret Mead
The problem with making assumptions
is that we believe they are the truth
- don Miguel Ruiz
The beginnings and endings of all human undertakings are untidy.
- John Galsworthy
Action is no less necessary than thought
to the instinctive tendencies of the human frame.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
We may have found a cure for most evils;
but we have found no remedy for the worst of them all,
the apathy of human beings.
- Helen Keller
Human progress is neither automatic nor inevitable...
Every step toward the goal of justice
requires sacrifice, suffering, and struggle;
the tireless exertions and
passionate concern of dedicated individuals.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Each and every human being on Earth
has both the responsibility and the privilege
of viewing themselves as Divine beings
with the power to bring about peace.
- James Twyman
The future has nothing in common with the past -
except natural laws and human nature.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Humanitarianism consists in never sacrificing
a human being to a purpose.
- Albert Schweitzer
It is against everything we stand for to take a human life.
Making an exception to that code is a bleak thing.
- Sam, from Twilight saga by Stephenie Meyer
It's all right for a woman to be, above all, human.
I am a woman first of all.
- Anais Nin
As far as we can discern,
the sole purpose of human existence
is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being.
- Carl Jung
We may have different religions, different
languages, different colored skin,
but we all belong to one human race.
- Kofi Annan
Sometimes our light goes out but
is blown into flame by another human being.
Each of us owes deepest thanks
to those who have rekindled this light.
- Albert Schweitzer
A day spent without the sight or sound of beauty,
the contemplation of mystery,
or the search of truth or perfection
is a poverty-stricken day; and a succession
of such days is fatal to human life.
- Lewis Mumford
Every human being is the author of his own health or disease.
- The Buddha
What do you take for granted?
It is human nature to take everything for granted -
our companions, our homes,
our electricity, our TVs and computers.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A man does what he must - in spite of personal consequences,
in spite of obstacles and dangers and pressures -
and that is the basis of all human morality.
- John F. Kennedy
Seriousness is a sickness; your sense of humor
makes you more human, more humble.
The sense of humor - according to me -
is one of the most essential parts of religiousness.
- Osho
Wherever there is a human being,
there is an opportunity for a kindness.
- Seneca
When will our consciences grow so tender
that we will act to prevent human misery rather than avenge it?
- Eleanor Roosevelt
No pessimist ever discovered the secret of the stars,
or sailed to an uncharted land,
or opened a new doorway for the human spirit.
- Helen Keller
Nature and human life are as various
as our several constitutions.
Who shall say what prospect life offers to another?
- Henry David Thoreau
One of the oldest human needs is having someone
to wonder where you are when you don't come home at night.
- Margaret Mead
Death may be the greatest of all human blessings.
- Socrates
I believe that every human mind feels pleasure
in doing good to another.
- Thomas Jefferson
Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary.
It fulfills the same function as pain in the human body.
It calls attention to an unhealthy state of things.
- Winston Churchill
I do not believe in immortality of the individual,
and I consider ethics to be an exclusively human concern
with no superhuman authority behind it.
- Albert Einstein
America did not invent human rights.
In a very real sense, it is the other way around.
Human rights invented America.
- Jimmy Carter
Let freedom reign. The sun never set
on so glorious a human achievement.
- Nelson Mandela
The first step in the evolution of ethics
is a sense of solidarity with other human beings.
- Albert Schweitzer
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.