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Let these funny Signifies Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
AUM, the most primordial human sound -
and the sound most connected to Spirit,
is pronounced in these three parts:
A (as in mama) - a throat sound
that vibrates in the abdomen - signifies waking.
U (as in who) - a tongue sound
that vibrates in the chest - signifies dreaming.
M (as in mama) - a lip sound
that vibrates in the head - signifies sleeping.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired,
signifies in the final sense
a theft from those who hunger and are not fed,
those who are cold and are not clothed.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
The savage in man is never quite eradicated.
- Henry David Thoreau
The most difficult thing in the world
is to know how to do a thing
and to watch somebody else doing it wrong,
without comment.
- Theodore. H. White
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Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
and I'm not sure about the universe.
- Albert Einstein
I'm not used to feeling so human.
Is it always like this?
- Edward, from Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer
I'm sure we all agree that we ought to love one another
and I know there are people in the world
that do not love their fellow human beings
and I HATE people like that.
- Tom Lehrer
Human beings are the only creatures on the planet
who tell time and think they have to earn a living.
- Buckminster Fuller
One of the greatest pains to human nature is the pain of a new idea.
- Walter Bagehot
Man's nature is not essentially evil.
Brute nature has been known to
yield to the influence of love.
You must never despair of human nature.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Human salvation lies in the hands
of the creatively maladjusted.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
The natural cause of the human mind
is certainly from credulity to skepticism.
- Thomas Jefferson
Only two things are infinite,
the universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein
The end of the human race will be that
it will eventually die of civilization.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Morality is the theory that every human act
must be either right or wrong,
and that 99 % of them are wrong.
- H. L. Mencken
Science may have found a cure for most evils;
but it has found no remedy for the worst of them all -
the apathy of human beings.
- Helen Keller
Human beings must have action;
and they will make it if they cannot find it.
- Albert Einstein
The more laws and order are made prominent,
the more thieves and robbers there will be.
- Lao Tzu
There are only two or three human stories,
and they go on repeating themselves as fiercely
as if they had never happened before.
- Willa Cather
Since boredom advances and boredom is the root of all evil,
no wonder, then, that the world goes backwards, that evil spreads.
This can be traced back to the very beginning of the world.
The gods were bored; therefore they created human beings.
- Soren Kierkegaard
The very essence of instinct is that
it's followed independently of reason.
- Charles Darwin
Our honorable and worthy ancestors knew that the world was flat,
motionless, and the center of the universe.
They knew the human body could not withstand
the forces of traveling faster than 19 mph.
They knew that the way to salvation was
exorcising witches and slaying non-believers.
They knew that it was a mortal sin to marry
someone of a different skin color.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
In human intercourse the tragedy begins,
not when there is misunderstanding about words,
but when silence is not understood.
- Henry David Thoreau
The human mind is our fundamental resource.
- John F. Kennedy
As human beings, our greatness lies
not so much in being able to remake the world -
as in being able to remake ourselves.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
The beginnings and endings of all human undertakings are untidy.
- John Galsworthy
If you fear making anyone mad,
then you ultimately probe for
the lowest common denominator of human achievement.
- Jimmy Carter
NO ONE is really different;
each of us is actually a member of the human race.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Being angry is as close as a human being
can come to experiencing hell on earth.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.
- Robert A. Heinlein
In the arena of human life,
the honors and rewards fall to those
who show their good qualities in action.
- Aristotle
The human spirit ranges across a truly amazing
diversity of experiences and emotions -
the highest peaks and the lowest valleys.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The purpose of human life is to serve,
and to show compassion and the will to help others.
- Albert Schweitzer
Human nature is potentially aggressive and destructive
and potentially orderly and constructive.
- Margaret Mead
The problem with making assumptions
is that we believe they are the truth
- don Miguel Ruiz
Mostly, it is human to dislike surprises -
often with great intensity.
Be open to new ways;
sometimes newness just knocks on our door;
welcome it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Each man is afraid of his neighbor's disapproval -
a thing which, to the general run of the human race,
is more dreaded than wolves and death.
- Mark Twain
If you were a warrior,
you would know that the worst thing
one can do is confront human beings directly.
- Carlos Castaneda
Every human life contains a potential,
if that potential is not fulfilled,
then that life was wasted...
- Carl Jung
Bodily decay is gloomy in prospect,
but of all human contemplations,
the most abhorrent is body without mind.
- Thomas Jefferson
The human mind treats a new idea the way the body
treats a strange protein; it rejects it.
- Peter Medawar
Sometimes, indeed, there is such a discrepancy
between the genius and his human qualities
that one has to ask oneself whether
a little less talent might not have been better.
- Carl Jung
Our problems are man-made, therefore they may be solved by man.
And man can be as big as he wants.
No problem of human destiny is beyond human beings.
- John F. Kennedy
No one can find inner peace except by working,
not in a self-centered way, but for the whole human family.
- Peace Pilgrim
Action is no less necessary than thought
to the instinctive tendencies of the human frame.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
We cannot despair of humanity,
since we ourselves are human beings.
- Albert Einstein
Seriousness is a sickness; your sense of humor
makes you more human, more humble.
The sense of humor - according to me -
is one of the most essential parts of religiousness.
- Osho
Each and every human being on Earth
has both the responsibility and the privilege
of viewing themselves as Divine beings
with the power to bring about peace.
- James Twyman
The first step in the evolution of ethics
is a sense of solidarity with other human beings.
- Albert Schweitzer
Human rights is the soul of our foreign policy,
because human rights is the very soul of our sense of nationhood.
- Jimmy Carter
It's humbling to think that all animals,
including human beings,
are parasites of the plant world.
- Isaac Asimov
No one ever found wisdom without also being a fool.
Writers, alas, have to be fools in public,
while the rest of the human race can cover its tracks.
- Erica Jong
Each contact with a human being is so rare, so precious,
one should preserve it.
- Anais Nin
Music produces a kind of pleasure
which human nature cannot do without.
- Confucius
Sometimes our light goes out but
is blown into flame by another human being.
Each of us owes deepest thanks
to those who have rekindled this light.
- Albert Schweitzer
I am a plain ordinary magnificent creation of God,
just like every other plain ordinary
mountain, ocean, tree, animal, and human.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Freedom makes a huge requirement of every human being.
With freedom comes responsibility.
For the person who is unwilling to grow up,
the person who does not want to carry is own weight,
this is a frightening prospect.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Be a Human BEing Rather Than a Human DOing.
- Anonymous
It is against everything we stand for to take a human life.
Making an exception to that code is a bleak thing.
- Sam, from Twilight saga by Stephenie Meyer
Being human, we are imperfect. That's why we need each other.
To catch each other when we falter.
To encourage each other when we lose heart.
Some may lead; others may follow; but none of us can go it alone.
- Hilary Clinton
To deal with individual human needs
at the everyday level can be noble sometimes.
- Jimmy Carter
Is the system going to flatten you out
and deny you your humanity,
or are you going to be able to make use of the system
to the attainment of human purposes?
- Joseph Campbell
Any human being who is becoming independent of conditionings,
of religions, scriptures, prophets and messiahs, has arrived home.
He has found the treasure which was hidden in his own being.
- Osho
There comes a pause, for human strength will not endure
to dance without cessation;
and everyone must reach the point at length of absolute prostration.
- Lewis Carroll
The human race has one really effective weapon,
and that is laughter.
- Mark Twain
We are not human beings having a spiritual experience.
We are spiritual beings having a human experience.
- Pierre Teilhard de Chardin
As far as we can discern,
the sole purpose of human existence
is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being.
- Carl Jung
There is no hope of joy except in human relations.
- Antoine de Saint-Exupery
Few are the giants of the soul that actually feel
that the human race is their family circle.
- Freya Stark
Nature and human life are as various
as our several constitutions.
Who shall say what prospect life offers to another?
- Henry David Thoreau
Let freedom reign. The sun never set
on so glorious a human achievement.
- Nelson Mandela
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.