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Let these funny Norms Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Questioning cultural norms opens new vistas of happiness and purpose.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Normal is not something to aspire to,
it's something to get away from.
- Jodie Foster
Grief is a normal and natural response to loss.
It is originally an unlearned feeling process.
Keeping grief inside increases your pain.
- Anne Grant
Normal is in the eye of the beholder.
- Whoopi Goldberg
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The basic thing nobody asks is
why do people take drugs of any sort?
Why do we have these accessories to normal living to live?
I mean, is there something wrong with society
that's making us so pressurized,
that we cannot live without guarding ourselves against it?
- John Lennon
Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand
It's not the size of the dog in the fight,
it's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Mark Twain
If you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- the movie The Matrix (1999)
Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer
"It's not that important,
don't worry about it" is the answer,
now what was the question?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
and I'm not sure about the universe.
- Albert Einstein
Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of ...
about me not listening to her, or something.
I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
- the movie Dumb & Dumber (1994)
I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
- Anonymous
Personally, I'm always ready to learn,
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill
It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel
No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous
In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland
When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain
Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
- Will Rogers
Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire
One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill
If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.
- Anonymous
Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove
I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln
The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
The key is, to not think of death as an end,
but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses.
- the movie Love and Death
Damn it boss, I like you too much not to say it.
You've got everything except one thing: madness!
- the movie Zorba The Greek
I'm not talking about lust.
A woman in lust wants chocolate.
A woman in love wants diamonds.
- the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West
DON'T get officious.
You're not yourself when you're officious -
That is the curse of a government job.
- the movie Harold and Maude (1971)
Marriage is a fine institution -
but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
- Mae West
I'm not used to feeling so human.
Is it always like this?
- Edward, from Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer
Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein
It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous
Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein
Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.
- Robert A. Heinlein
I do not fear death.
I had been dead for billions and billions
of years before I was born,
and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.
- Mark Twain
As far as the laws of mathematics
refer to reality, they are not certain,
and as far as they are certain,
they do not refer to reality.
- Albert Einstein
The faith that stands on authority is not faith.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Only two things are infinite,
the universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein
A ship in harbor is safe -
but that is not what ships are for.
- John A. Shedd
There is no pleasure in having nothing to do;
the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it.
- Mary Wilson Little
I am not young enough to know everything.
- Oscar Wilde
Contrary to general belief,
I do not believe that friends are necessarily
the people you like best,
they are merely the people who got there first.
- Peter Ustinov
If you can not answer a man's argument,
all is not lost; you can still call him vile names.
- Elbert Hubbard
I am always ready to learn
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill
Belief is not the beginning but the end of all knowledge.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
The existence of an anthropomorphic
"Father-figure" deity is not impossible,
merely exceptionally improbable and illogical.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Do not speak to me of rules.
This is war! This is not a game of cricket!
- from the movie The Bridge On The River Kwai
The trouble with the world is not
that people know too little,
but that they know so many things that ain't so.
- Mark Twain
When dealing with people, remember you are
not dealing with creatures of logic,
but creatures of emotion.
- Dale Carnegie
Though I am a servant, I am not your servant.
- Ursula K. Le Guin
Life is never fair, and perhaps it is a good thing
for most of us that it is not.
- Oscar Wilde
Confused Memories of Childhood:
Hate to my father, cruel hate,
confused with love - a mix not great.
The man I love - the man I hate;
the man I want to emulate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I do not believe that civilization will be wiped out
in a war fought with the atomic bomb.
Perhaps two-thirds of the people of the earth will be killed.
- Albert Einstein
Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition,
is not only a waste of energy
but the worst habit you could possibly have.
- Dale Carnegie
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our Light, not our Darkness, that most frightens us.
- Marianne Williamson
Adventure is not outside man; it is within.
- George Eliot
Delusion: belief said to be false by someone who does not share it.
- Thomas Szasz
Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth
until the hour of separation.
- Khalil Gibran
The lawyer's truth is not Truth,
but consistency or a consistent expediency.
- Henry David Thoreau
The only advantage of not being too good a housekeeper
is that your guests are so pleased
to feel how very much better they are.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
One minute you're in the lunchroom at Glenwood High
and you ... blink and you're 40,
you blink again and you can see movies
at half price on a senior citizen's pass.
Ask not for whom the bell tolls, or to put it more accurately,
ask not for whom the toilet flushes.
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity
Do not take life too seriously.
You will never get out of it alive.
- Elbert Hubbard
We are finally driven to monogamy
not by morality but by exhaustion.
- Erica Jong
Do not laugh much or often or unrestrainedly.
- Epictetus
The wine of youth does not always
clear with advancing years;
sometimes it grows turbid.
- Carl Jung
Silence is not always a Sign of Wisdom,
but Babbling is ever a folly.
- Benjamin Franklin
A positive attitude may not solve all your problems,
but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.
- Herm Albright
Although personally I am quite content with existing explosives,
I feel we must not stand in the path of improvement.
- Winston Churchill
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.