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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Lifeless Quotes
Funny Quotes about Lifeless

Let these funny Lifeless Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Today is what life is all about.
When I desire for the future to arrive quickly,
I become unable to savor today.
I can't live in tomorrow, and when I focus
all my energies on the future, I shortchange today.
Likewise, fearing the future emasculates today,
leaving it dry and lifeless.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I want to thank my parents for everything I am today -
fat, miserable, and paranoid.
- Anonymous

Things have never been more like the way they are today in history.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

How do you want to be remembered?
Live life full out - Begin today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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Today is probably a good day for something;
but it's a better day for doing nothing.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

You are Never Too Old to Give or Get Gold Stars.
Show Your Honest Appreciation - Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Hang tough... big girl panties today.
- Anonymous humor


 

Today, I Tap Dance Across The Stage of Life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

What If Every Day Were Your Day -
Celebrate Whimsey Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today, I am Sending My Monkey Mind to the Zoo.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Those distractions that turn my attention from
what I thought I was going to do today are not "rat holes";
they are Enchanted Rabbit Holes
with a Magical White Bunny awaiting in each.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Dance Lightly With Life:
Today is your day to
dance lightly with life,
sing wild songs of adventure,
soar your spirit,
unfurl your joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Happy Birthday!
Today is YOUR day to Dance Lightly With Life.
Have a wonderful day.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today is your day to dance lightly with life,
sing wild songs of adventure,
invite rainbows and butterflies out to play,
soar your spirit, and unfurl your joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today is the first day of the rest of your life.
- Anonymous

Today is your day to paint life in bold colors;
set today's rhythm with your heart-drum;
walk today's march with courage;
create today as your celebration of life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Yesterday is ashes.
Tomorrow is green wood.
Only today does the fire burn brightly.
- Eskimo Proverb

I Create Today As a Celebration of My Life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today, I choose the higher road -
the path of charity, acceptance, love, selflessness, kindness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Find a time and place of solitude.
Look into the distance, and into the future.
Visualize the tomorrow you are going to build -
and begin to build that tomorrow, today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Is today a day to gather strength from the storm -
a day to to learn life lessons for the next battle?
Or is today a day to sit by the fire
and watch the storm rage outside?
Either way, the storm is just life.
Give thanks for all of Life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today is your day to laugh at life,
laugh at what's funny - laugh at what's sad,
laugh loud - laugh often,
laugh at me - laugh at you - laugh at life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Affirmation:
Today I choose the higher road -
the path of charity, acceptance,
love, selflessness, kindness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I Dream This Day of Wondrous Things,
of Peace and Hope and Pride.
I Dance My Dance with Life Today,
I'm Filled with Love Inside.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Yesterday is history,
tomorrow is a mystery.
Today is a gift.
That is why it is called Present.
- Anonymous

Today, I Dance Lightly With Life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today is the bridge between acceptance and faith.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Give somebody a gold star - Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I Walk Today's March With Courage.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today is a day to cover your best weapons in velvet.
Go gently into the world.
Hold your anger.
Keep your competitive spirit in check.
Some day you will need your fierce weapons,
but not today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If you want to do it,
Do It - TODAY.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Don't Wait!
Start on your dreams, your impulses,
your longings, your special occasions today.
Because this is your moment.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Today is a day to honor other cultures.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Memory is deceptive because it is colored by today's events.
- Albert Einstein

Whatever you want in life, start today.
Not tomorrow - today.
Let it be a small beginning - a tiny beginning.
Your happiness depends on starting today - every day.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Choose wisely - then act decisively. Do it today!
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

You're off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting,
So... get on your way!
- Dr. Seuss

I was thinking that I might fly today.
Just to disprove all the things you say...
please be careful with me, I'm sensitive,
and I'd like to stay that way.
- Jewel

The Paradox Of Living In The Moment is -
How To Be Happy Today AND Prepare For Tomorrow
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today is your day to Spread Wing and Soar.
Fly Life on Free Wings, and Sing to its Glory.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The importance of history is in it's
educational value for our lives today,
not in regret, resentment, or revenge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Make Today count. Today - each Today -
is the most important day of your life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Dream as if you'll live forever.
Live as if you'll die today.
- James Dean

Today I offer a prayer of forgiveness:
forgive the pettiness of my ingratitude...
the absence of profound thankfulness.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Let Today be a Thanksgiving.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Create today as your celebration of life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Hate destroys, Love builds.
Hate tears down, Love renews and creates.
Hatred holds no hope for the future.
Love creates Today as its own better future.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today is my day to honor my being,
release each and every struggle,
gather strength from life's storms,
relax into the arms of spirit.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today, try something you have never tried before.
Perhaps just a food that is new to you -
perhaps a whole new way of living.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

How does it become a man to behave
towards the American government today?
I answer, that he cannot without disgrace be associated with it.
- Henry David Thoreau

Let today be the day that you choose
to become your own greatest Hero.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today... maybe I can take one step
on that profoundly complex path to peace.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Today is your day to honor your being,
release each and every struggle,
gather strength from life's storms,
relax into the arms of spirit.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

In whose wonder do you get to participate today?
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Our grandchildren's grandchildren will shake their heads in shame
at some of the beliefs that we hold most dear today -
the question is, which ones?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today is my day to laugh loud - laugh often
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today Is My Day To Laugh At Life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Stop wishing and fearing the future
long enough to be fully present in TODAY.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today is a Happy Day because I say it is.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today's problems can seldom be solved using yesterday's answers.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I say that Today is a Perfect Day.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today I invite life to dance.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today is a day to choose a different path.
Enjoy the unknown way - one step at a time.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today, I will do my best...
and then relax in the knowing
that I have done all I could.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Where there is unconditional love,
there is no room for unhappiness.
Whenever I look in the mirror today,
I will say to myself: "That Is The Face Of God."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today is my day to honor my being,
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow,
it only saps today of its joy.
- Leo Buscaglia

We stand today on the edge of a new frontier ...
a frontier of unknown opportunities and perils -
a frontier of unfulfilled hopes and threats.
- John F. Kennedy

It is difficult to say what is impossible,
for the dream of yesterday is the hope of today
and the reality of tomorrow.
- Robert H. Goddard

Today, I Roar My Courage.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today, I Allow Spirit To Carry All My Burdens.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.