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Let these funny Function Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
What exactly is the function of a rubber duck?
- the movie Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (2002)
The function of muscle is to pull and not to push,
except in the case of the genitals and the tongue.
- Leonardo da Vinci
Self-respect is not a function of size, age, or wealth.
Breathe deep, sing loud and sweet,
"I am me, I am unique, I am magnificent."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie 
The function of prayer is not to influence God,
but rather to change the nature of the one who prays.
- Soren Kierkegaard
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To transform breakdowns into breakthroughs
is the whole function of a master.
- Osho
Minds are like parachutes.
They only function when they are open.
- James Dewar
Happiness is a function of accepting what is.
- Werner Erhard
The function of education is to teach one
to think intensively and to think critically.
Intelligence plus character - that is the goal of true education.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary.
It fulfills the same function as pain in the human body.
It calls attention to an unhealthy state of things.
- Winston Churchill
Form follows function - that has been misunderstood.
Form and function should be one, joined in a spiritual union.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
I would rather be ashes than dust!
I would rather that my spark should burn out in a brilliant blaze
than it should be stifled by dry rot.
I would rather be a superb meteor,
every atom of me in magnificent glow,
than a sleepy and permanent planet.
The proper function of man is to live, not to exist.
I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them.
I shall use my time.
- Jack London
Choose the whole of your environment, things and events,
based upon the value, meaning and function they hold.
Do not allow obligation or immediacy
to bind you to physical things or specific actions.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
It is the function of art to renew our perception.
What we are familiar with we cease to see.
The writer shakes up the familiar scene,
and, as if by magic, we see a new meaning in it.
- Anais Nin
AN INSPIRED LIFE: I HAVE A CHOICE
My key to living an inspired life involves
Embracing my history,
Understanding the function of expectations
and gently learning to have none;
Recognizing the power of attentive and conscious choices.
In all circumstances I acknowledge this,
IN ALL THINGS AND ALL WAYS, I HAVE CHOICE.
My choice resides in my perspective.
While I certainly do not control climate
and markets and roadways and others,
I do control myself and my response
to all those circumstances. I do indeed.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
The heart is the chief feature of a functioning mind.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain
The man of science is a poor philosopher.
- Albert Einstein
Love is like an hourglass,
with the heart filling up as the brain empties.
- Jules Renard
Comedy keeps the heart sweet.
- Mark Twain
God Loves an Open Mind, Clean Hands, and a Loving Heart.
So does Your Mother.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Tell your heart that the fear of suffering
is worse than the suffering itself.
- Paulo Coelho
Distance cannot matter - ours is a friendship of the heart.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Anger is like a thorn in the heart.
- Yiddish Proverb
The most beautiful things in the world
cannot be seen or even touched,
they must be felt with the heart.
- Helen Keller
You change your life by changing your heart.
- Max Lucado
Set Life's Rhythm with Your Heart-Drum
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The longer I live, the more beautiful life becomes.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Listen to the compass of your heart.
All you need lies within you.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
I say NO to the demands of the world.
I say YES to the longings of my own heart.
There is nothing I ever need to have.
There is nothing I ever need to do.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The power of intuitive understanding
will protect you from harm until the end of your days.
- Lao Tzu
Say NO to the demands of the world.
Say YES to the longings of your own heart.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
We attract abundance when we ask from a compassionate heart.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The key to forgiveness is to forgive from the heart -
not from the mind.
- Sheri Rosenthal
The intuitive mind is a sacred gift
and the rational mind is a faithful servant.
We have created a society that honors the servant
and has forgotten the gift.
- Albert Einstein
Today is your day to paint life in bold colors;
set today's rhythm with your heart-drum;
walk today's march with courage;
create today as your celebration of life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The more you see the less you know.
- Bono
Live boldly. Laugh Loudly. Love Truly.
Play as often as you can
Work as smart as you are able.
Share your heart as deeply as you can reach.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
And you would accept the seasons of your heart
just as you have always accepted
that seasons pass over your fields
and you would watch with serenity
through the winters of your grief.
- Khalil Gibran
Do what you feel in your heart to be right.
You'll be criticized anyway.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
A mind all logic is like a knife all blade.
It makes the hand bleed that uses it.
- Rabindranath Tagore
The more you know the less you feel.
- Bono
Farewell My Friend
It was beautiful as long as it lasted
The journey of my life.
I have no regrets whatsoever
save the pain I'll leave behind.
Those dear hearts who love and care...
And the strings pulling at the heart and soul...
The strong arms that held me up
When my own strength let me down.
At every turning of my life
I came across good friends,
Friends who stood by me,
Even when the time raced me by.
Farewell, farewell my friends
I smile and bid you goodbye.
No, shed no tears for I need them not
All I need is your smile.
If you feel sad do think of me
for that's what I'll like
when you live in the hearts
of those you love, remember then
you never die.
- Gitanjali Ghei
Few is the number of those
who think with their own mind
and feel with their own heart.
- Albert Einstein
In case you failed to notice,
in case you failed to see,
this is my heart,
bleeding before you,
this is me down on my knees.
- Jewel
When you are sorrowful, look again in your heart,
and you shall see that in truth
you are weeping for that which has been your delight.
- Khalil Gibran
"Sometimes," said Pooh, "the smallest things take up the most room in your heart."
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Thy friendship oft has made my heart to ache;
do be my enemy - for friendship's sake.
- William Blake
My heart bleeds at the death of every one of our gallant men.
- Robert E. Lee
Piglet noticed that even though he had a Very Small Heart,
it could hold a rather large amount of Gratitude.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Choose Inner Peace.
Nothing is worth losing your inner peace.
Take action as circumstances require,
but never surrender your inner peace.
Stop. Breathe deeply.
Close your eyes and breathe deeply again.
Then, and only then, take action -
from a peaceful heart.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Doubt and mistrust are the mere panic of timid imagination,
which the steadfast heart will conquer,
and the large mind will transcend.
- Helen Keller
The intellect is a cold thing
and a merely intellectual idea
will never stimulate thought
in the same manner that a spiritual idea does.
- Ernest Holmes
Deep in my heart I'm concealing things
that I'm longing to say.
Scared to confess what I'm feeling -
frightened you'll slip away.
- the movie Evita
Everyone should carefully observe
which way his heart draws him,
and then choose that way with all his strength.
- Hasidic Proverb
Those who don't know how to weep with their whole heart,
don't know how to laugh either
- Golda Meir
If there ever comes a day when we can't be together,
keep me in your heart, I'll stay there forever.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
The heart is always right -
if there's a question of choosing between the mind and the heart -
because mind is a creation of the society.
It has been educated.
You have been given it by the society, not by existence.
The heart is unpolluted.
- Osho
Lovers who have been left, lose confidence and become afraid.
They learn to leave relationships first.
The broken hearted become the heart breakers.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
There are no good-byes.
Wherever we are, you'll always be in my heart.
- Anonymous
The language of Friendship is not words, but meanings.
It is an intelligence above language.
- Henry David Thoreau
May flowers always line your path and sunshine light your day.
May songbirds serenade you every step along the way.
May a rainbow run beside you in a sky that's always blue.
And may happiness fill your heart each day your whole life through.
- Irish Blessing
The primal rhythmic power
and resonant sound of waves on the shore
are like the earth's heartbeat,
and become our connection with the body of nature.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I have accepted fear as a part of life -
specifically the fear of change...
I have gone ahead despite the pounding
in the heart that says: turn back.
- Erica Jong
The heart, not the head, must be the guide.
- Arthur Erickson
Non-violence is not a garment to be put on and off at will.
Its seat is in the heart,
and it must be an inseparable part of our being.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
The WAY is Not The Way for You,
Unless You Come With an Open Mind,
Clean Hands, and a Loving Heart.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A man is relieved and gay when he has
put his heart into his work and done his best;
but what he has said or done otherwise
shall give him no peace.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
A worker in the rural reconstruction must have:
The body of an athlete
The attitude of a teacher
The mind of a scientist
The heart of a missionary
The spirit of a crusader.
- Jimmy Yen
Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
- Thomas Haynes Bayly
So long as the memory of certain
beloved friends lives in my heart,
I shall say that life is good.
- Helen Keller
I say YES to the longings of my own heart.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.