Let these funny Characteristics Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Buddhism has the characteristics of what would be expected
in a cosmic religion for the future:
It transcends a personal God, avoids dogmas and theology;
it covers both the natural and the spiritual,
and it is based on a religious sense
aspiring from the experience of all things,
natural and spiritual, as a meaningful unity.
- Albert Einstein
It is a characteristic of wisdom
not to do desperate things.
- Henry David Thoreau
All endeavor calls for the ability
to tramp the last mile,
shape the last plan, endure the last hours toil.
The fight to the finish spirit is the one...
characteristic we must posses
if we are to face the future as finishers.
- Henry David Thoreau
If you do what you've always done,
you'll get what you always got.
- Mark Twain
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"It's not that important,
don't worry about it" is the answer,
now what was the question?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble.
It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
- Mark Twain (attributed)
You can't make an omelet without breaking eggs.
- Anonymous
Well, you ask a silly question, and you get a silly answer.
- Tom Lehrer
The first sigh of love is the last breath of wisdom.
- Anonymous
What would be the use of immortality to a person
who cannot use well a half an hour.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
To go against the dominant thinking of your friends,
of most of the people you see every day,
is perhaps the most difficult act of heroism you can perform.
- Theodore H. White
You can observe a lot by just watching.
- Yogi Berra
One of the greatest pains to human nature is the pain of a new idea.
- Walter Bagehot
The end of the human race will be that
it will eventually die of civilization.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
This above all, to thine own self be true.
- William Shakespeare
In the book of life, the answers aren't in the back.
- Charles M. Schulz in his Peanuts cartoon
The universe we observe has precisely
the properties we should expect
if there is, at bottom, no design,
no purpose, no evil, no good,
nothing but blind, pitiless indifference.
- Charles Darwin
Children, cartoon animals, comedians,
and space aliens can get away with saying
what the rest of us are afraid is true,
but are embarrassed to talk about.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The mind is not a vessel to be filled
but a fire to be kindled.
- Plutarch
Money won't make you happy...
but everybody wants to find out for themselves.
- Zig Ziglar
Life is defined more by its contrasts than its samenesses;
Life is defined more by its risks than the many securities.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Where there's a will, there's a way.
- old English proverb
Most men lead lives of quiet desperation
and go to the grave with the song still in them.
- Henry David Thoreau
The more he became truly wise,
the more he distrusted everything he knew.
- Voltaire
Everybody is a genius.
But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree,
it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.
- Albert Einstein
All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
I can't go back to yesterday -
because I was a different person then.
- Lewis Carroll
There is only one thing about which I am certain,
and that is that there is very little
about which one can be certain.
- W. Somerset Maugham
Never give a sword to a man who can't dance.
- Confucius
Knowing your own darkness is the best method
for dealing with the darknesses of other people.
- Carl Jung
How many legs does a dog have
if you call the tail a leg? Four.
Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg.
- Abraham Lincoln
Speak when you are angry -
and you will make the best speech you'll ever regret.
- Laurence J. Peter
Just once in a while, let us exalt
the importance of ideas and information.
- Edward R. Murrow
Society is always taken by surprise
at any new example of common sense.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Stay Happy, never let anyone get your goat.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
"But I don't want to go among mad people," said Alice.
"Oh, you can't help that," said the cat. "We're all mad here."
- Lewis Carroll
The urge to save humanity is almost always
a false front for the urge to rule.
- H. L. Mencken
When dealing with people, remember you are
not dealing with creatures of logic,
but creatures of emotion.
- Dale Carnegie
It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool,
than to speak and remove all doubt.
- sometimes attributed to Mark Twain, Abraham Lincoln, or Samuel Johnson
When all think alike, no one is thinking very much.
- Walter Lippmann
The way I see it, it doesn't matter what you believe,
just so you're sincere.
- Linus Van Pelt in Charles M. Schulz' Go Fly A Kite, Charlie Brown
Unsolicited Advice Is Always Meddling.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You can't stop the music, nobody can stop the music.
- Village People
The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it.
- Henry David Thoreau
The traveler sees what he sees,
the tourist sees what he has come to see.
- Gilbert K. Chesterton
The attempt to combine wisdom and power
has only rarely been successful and then only for a short while.
- Albert Einstein
"Hurry up" ranks right up there with "you need to"
as a destroyer of our humanity.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I am not a slave to my thoughts or emotions.
- Richard Carlson
We all live with the objective of being happy;
our lives are all different and yet the same.
- Anne Frank
Honor tradition AND question tradition.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A time for work, a time for play -
balance in all things.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
By letting it go it all gets done.
The world is won by those who let it go.
But when you try and try.
The world is beyond the winning.
- Lao Tzu
Drop the sword - for there is but one flesh to wound,
and it is the one flesh of all humankind.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
He who is contented is rich.
- Lao Tzu
A bird does not sing because it has an answer.
It sings because it has a song.
- Chinese Proverb
I have found that if you love life,
life will love you back.
- Arthur Rubinstein
Universal compassion is the only guarantee of morality.
- Arthur Schopenhauer
People only see what they are prepared to see.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
To the mind that is still,
the whole universe surrenders.
- Lao Tzu
Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished.
- Lao Tzu
"Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare,
The lone and level sands stretch far away.
- Percy Bysshe Shelley
It isn't what you have, or who you are, or where you are,
or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy.
It is what you think about.
- Dale Carnegie
Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates.
You never know what you're gonna get.
- the movie Forrest Gump
Life is really simple,
but we insist on making it complicated.
- Confucius
If you wait for opportunities to occur,
you will be one of the crowd.
- Edward de Bono
It is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.
- Chinese proverb often quoted by Eleanor Roosevelt
Don't underestimate the value of Doing Nothing,
of just going along,
listening to all the things you can't hear,
and not bothering.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Everyone is a prisoner of his own experiences.
No one can eliminate prejudices -
just recognize them.
- Edward R. Murrow
The power of imagination makes us infinite.
- John Muir
The truth. It is a beautiful and terrible thing,
and should be treated with caution.
- J. K. Rowling
The question is not what you look at, but what you see.
- Henry David Thoreau
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.