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Let these funny Cell Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Globalization, as defined by rich people like us,
is a very nice thing...
you are talking about the Internet,
you are talking about cell phones,
you are talking about computers.
This doesn't affect two-thirds of the people of the world.
- Jimmy Carter
Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while.
- Groucho Marx
Life is like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute -
only the last couple seconds are fatal,
but most people are scared to death the whole way down.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life ... full of loneliness, and misery,
and suffering, and unhappiness,
and it's all over much too quickly.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall
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Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz
I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
Life's like Vegas. You're up, you're down,
but in the end the house always wins.
Doesn't mean you didn't have fun.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
The trick is growing up without growing old.
- Casey Stengel
The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec
It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble.
It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
- Mark Twain (attributed)
Morality is simply the attitude we adopt
towards people whom we personally dislike.
- Oscar Wilde
Life only
appears to be
rushing toward us
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.
- John Lennon
If life is a trial, who is the judge and jury?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is defined more by its contrasts than its samenesses;
Life is defined more by its risks than the many securities.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
You can't make an omelet without breaking eggs.
- Anonymous
The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous
Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born
at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.
- Mark Twain
Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
- Mark Twain
Old age is fifteen years older than I am.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
No matter how much cats fight,
there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
- Abraham Lincoln
Life is always lived in the eye-of-the-storm
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is a journey - enjoy the journey.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
- Oscar Wilde
One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill
Life is serious, get out your magic wand.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The difference between school and life?
In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test.
In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson.
- Tom Bodett
To the young child, all life is a great adventure -
when did we grow so dull and brittle.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
- Ogden Nash
In the book of life, the answers aren't in the back.
- Charles M. Schulz in his Peanuts cartoon
Life is really simple,
but we insist on making it complicated.
- Confucius
Here's a toast to your new bride who has everything a girl
could want in her life, except for good taste in men.
- Anonymous
Any idiot can face a crisis.
It's the day-to-day living that wears you out.
- Anton Chekhov
Joy is a choice - but it isn't an easy choice.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It's never too late -
never too late to start over,
never too late to be happy.
- Jane Fonda
If life is a bowl of cherries, then what am I doing in the pits?
- Erma Bombeck
Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller
Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son.
- the movie National Lampoon's Animal House (1978)
Is today a day to gather strength from the storm -
a day to to learn life lessons for the next battle?
Or is today a day to sit by the fire
and watch the storm rage outside?
Either way, the storm is just life.
Give thanks for all of Life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
- George Carlin
I can't go back to yesterday -
because I was a different person then.
- Lewis Carroll
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...
It's about learning to Dance in the Rain.
- Vivian Greene
You can observe a lot by just watching.
- Yogi Berra
Some things will never seem adequate
no matter how hard we try.
- from the movie White Man's Burden
In critical moments men sometimes see
exactly what they wish to see.
- the character Spock of the television series Star Trek
Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates.
You never know what you're gonna get.
- the movie Forrest Gump
When dealing with people, remember you are
not dealing with creatures of logic,
but creatures of emotion.
- Dale Carnegie
Nobody can be uncheered with a balloon.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Only a fool tests the depth of the water with both feet.
- African Proverb
We have a great life here in Alaska,
and we're never going back to America again!
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)
Iron rusts from disuse;
water loses its purity from stagnation...
even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind.
- Leonardo da Vinci
Life's burdens are lighter when I laugh at myself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Knowing your own darkness is the best method
for dealing with the darknesses of other people.
- Carl Jung
I love and treasure individuals as I meet them;
I loathe and despise the groups
they identify with and belong to.
- George Carlin
I have found that if you love life,
life will love you back.
- Arthur Rubinstein
The essence of life is not in
the great victories and grand failures,
but in the simple joys.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Happiness is a figment of the imagination.
Imagine happiness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Do you feel stuck?
Whether in a project, a job, a relationship,
or some other situation,
there is a time for perseverance,
and a time for letting go and moving on.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It is hard enough to remember my opinions,
without also remembering my reasons for them!
- Friedrich Nietzsche
Life is lived in the living.
Set aside convention, caution,
and arbitrary "rules" about how
life is supposed to be lived.
Choose! Explore! Adventure!
Live life to the fullest.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You are Never Too Old to Give or Get Gold Stars.
Show Your Honest Appreciation - Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Man is a credulous animal, and must believe something;
in the absence of good grounds for belief,
he will be satisfied with bad ones.
- Bertrand Russell
I never accepted the idea
that I had to be guided by
some pattern or blueprint.
- Little Richard
Bringing a childlike wonder
and a beginner's mind to life
maximizes both success and joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
She generally gave herself very good advice,
(though she very seldom followed it).
- Lewis Carroll
A big part of letting go is recognizing
when it is time to stay in a situation
and when it is time to move on.
- Darren L. Johnson
Life is a reflection of intent.
Love reflects love.
Hate reflects hate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Normal is not something to aspire to,
it's something to get away from.
- Jodie Foster
The book of life is filled with incoherent riddles.
Life's true lessons are inscribed in a corner of the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.