Facebook share Tweet This Email this
Let these funny Bakery Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
See beauty in those unexpected places.
(she asked herself how people could let Bach be background noise.)
See the opportunity in what looks like inconvenience.
(she steered clear of the traffic jam
and went to the bakery she's been meaning to stop at.)
She embraces the undeclared possibility
in what seems like just another ordinary day.
(her friend is scheduled for cancer surgery
and suddenly everything around her seems so very precious.)
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Divine love will meet all human needs
- Mary Baker Eddy
Rarely do we find men who willingly engage in hard, solid thinking.
There is an almost universal quest
for easy answers and half-baked solutions.
Nothing pains some people more than having to think.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
The attempt to combine wisdom and power
has only rarely been successful and then only for a short while.
- Albert Einstein
Get a Funny Quote of the Day each day by email or in your feed reader.
The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.
- Oscar Wilde
Authority has every reason to fear the skeptic,
for authority can rarely survive in the face of doubt.
- Robert Lindner
People rarely succeed unless they
have fun in what they are doing.
- Dale Carnegie
Those who can win a war well can rarely make a good peace
and those who could make a good peace
would never have won the war.
- Winston Churchill
Unlike presidential administrations,
problems rarely have terminal dates.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
It had long since come to my attention
that people of accomplishment
rarely sat back and let things happen to them.
They went out and happened to things.
- Leonardo da Vinci
It is a wonderful advantage to a man,
in every pursuit or avocation,
to secure an adviser in a sensible woman.
In woman there is at once a subtle delicacy of tact,
and a plain soundness of judgement,
which are rarely combined to an equal degree in man.
A woman, if she be really your friend,
will have a sensitive regard for your character, honor, repute.
She will seldom counsel you to do a shabby thing:
for a woman friend always desires to be proud of you.
- Edward Bulwer-Lytton
Know that life is most joyful when you
neither attempt to hurry the future nor to slow it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I am still amazed at how big, how enormous
a love and mystery God is -
and how small are the minds
that attempt to corral
this life force into rules and taboos,
cults and sects.
- Bono
It is useless for us to attempt to reason a man
out of a thing he has never been reasoned into.
- Jonathan Swift
Glory lies in the attempt to reach one's goal,
and not in reaching it.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Moral authority is never retained by
any attempt to hold on to it.
It comes without seeking and
is retained without effort.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
There should be an honest attempt at the reconciliation
of differences before resorting to combat.
- Jimmy Carter
Do not attempt to conquer the world with force,
for force only causes resistance.
- Lao Tzu
What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?
- Robert H. Schuller
If you get frustrated by some of your family,
focus on the good aspects of your relationship
and attempt to overlook the irritations.
Then give thanks for everyone who plays a part in your life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
"Fair" is not a useful concept.
Life is not "fair."
You can't make life "fair."
You can get angry.
You can complain about life not being "fair."
You can attempt revenge - perhaps violently.
You can inflict great suffering upon yourself
in the name of life being "unfair."
And Life is still not "fair."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I honor you, Hero, for you do not play to the crowd.
You play to your own soul.
An audience of one fills the house with its appreciation and applause.
Others follow you, and may attempt to emulate you,
but that is not why you are a hero.
Fame may smile upon you, or it may not.
The world may cheer your name, or you may be the unknown warrior
who rescued comrades in battle,
or taught a young girl how to shed tears of joy.
Whatever you did, you did not do for fame.
If you had, you would not be a Hero.
You are a Hero for your bold courageous inspired action.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble.
It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
- Mark Twain (attributed)
Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of ...
about me not listening to her, or something.
I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
- the movie Dumb & Dumber (1994)
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin
You know, it takes two to get one in trouble.
- the movie She Done Him Wrong (1933)
A relationship, I think, is like a shark.
You know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies.
And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall (1977)
Half the people you know are below average.
- Anonymous
You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
Too bad all the people who know how to run this country
are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair.
- George Burns
If you don't know where you are going,
you might wind up someplace else.
- Yogi Berra
You know what? Maybe there's a good reason
donkeys shouldn't talk.
- the movie Shrek (2001)
I feel the need to express something,
but I don't know what it is I want to express.
- the movie Interiors
He early on let her know who is the boss.
He looked her right in the eye and clearly said, "You're the boss."
- Anonymous humor
Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world.
I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain
God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is,
he's stuck with so many bad actors
who don't know how to play funny.
- Garrison Keillor
One should never know too precisely
whom one has married
- Friedrich Nietzsche
There are three hundred and sixty-four days
when you might get un-birthday presents,
and only one for birthday presents, you know.
- Lewis Carroll
The most difficult thing in the world
is to know how to do a thing
and to watch somebody else doing it wrong,
without comment.
- Theodore. H. White
I am not young enough to know everything.
- Oscar Wilde
Too often the strong, silent man is silent only because
he does not know what to say, and is reputed strong
only because he has remained silent.
- Winston Churchill
I refuse to answer that question
on the grounds that I don't know the answer
- Douglas Adams
If you ask me anything I don't know,
I'm not going to answer.
- Yogi Berra
Faith: not wanting to know what is true.
- Friedrich Nietzsche
The trouble with the world is not
that people know too little,
but that they know so many things that ain't so.
- Mark Twain
Is it ignorance or apathy?
Hey, I don't know and I don't care.
- Jimmy Buffett
I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner
We're more popular than Jesus now;
I don't know which will go first, rock 'n' roll or Christianity.
- John Lennon
Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer
but wish we didn't.
- Erica Jong
I am no longer young enough to know everything.
- Oscar Wilde
Do not bite at the bait of pleasure,
till you know there is no hook beneath it.
- Thomas Jefferson
You know your god is man-made when he
hates all the same people you do.
- Anonymous
You wanna know the meaning of life?
Fugedaboudit - It ain't happnin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man,
and I hate people like that!
- Tom Lehrer
Know that the greatest fear is fear of the unknown.
Seek to meet the unknown with courage and a sense of adventure.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Faith is believing what you know ain't so.
- Mark Twain
There are four stages in a marriage.
First there's the affair,
then the marriage,
then children
and finally the fourth stage,
without which you cannot know a woman, the divorce.
- Norman Mailer
I don't know, I don't care,
and it doesn't make any difference!
- Albert Einstein
A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
- Steve Martin
I'm sure we all agree that we ought to love one another
and I know there are people in the world
that do not love their fellow human beings
and I HATE people like that.
- Tom Lehrer
People who think they know everything
are a great annoyance to those of us who do.
- Isaac Asimov
I know that God made the whole world in 4004 BC.
I know because my preacher told me. He's a good man.
He's even saving up all the money we give him
to go to bible college someday.
- Anonymous Humor
There's nothing you can know that isn't known.
- John Lennon
I don't know which will go first - rock 'n' roll or Christianity.
- John Lennon
All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates.
You never know what you're gonna get.
- the movie Forrest Gump
To know God, watch a butterfly return to the same tree -
after a year and a thousand miles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You know that place between sleeping and awake,
that place where you can still remember dreaming?
That's where I'll always think of you.
- James M. Barrie
If you don't know where you're going,
any road will take you there.
- Lewis Carroll
(Alice in Wonderland)
Know the power and the peace of saying,
"I love you just the way you are."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
To know yet to think that one does not know is best;
Not to know yet to think that one knows
will lead to difficulty.
- Lao Tzu
Thank you for visiting: Funny Bakery Quotes - Funny Quotes about Bakery.
Please sign up on the form below to receive
my Free Daily Inspiration - Daily Quotes email.
You can also search my large collection of Funny Quotes.
May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.