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Argue for your limitations, and sure enough they're yours. ...
by Richard Bach

Argue for your limitations, and sure enough they're yours.
- Richard Bach

Don't be dismayed by good-byes.
A farewell is necessary before you can meet again.
- Richard Bach

The simplest questions are the most profound.
Where were you born?
Where is your home?
Where are you going?
What are you doing?
Think about these once in a while
and watch your answers change.
- Richard Bach PHOTO

Can miles truly separate us from friends?
If we want to be with someone we love, aren't we already there?
- Richard Bach


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If you love something, set it free;
if it comes back it's yours,
if it doesn't, it never was.
- Richard Bach

Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished:
If you're alive, it isn't.
- Richard Bach

What the caterpillar calls the end of the world,
the master calls a butterfly.
- Richard Bach


 

You are never given a wish without also
being given the power to make it true.
You may have to work for it, however.
- Richard Bach

That's what learning is, after all;
not whether we lose the game,
but how we lose and h
ow we've changed because of it
and what we take away from it
that we never had before,
to apply to other games.
Losing, in a curious way, is winning.
- Richard Bach

Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire

Christianity will go. It will vanish and shrink.
I needn't argue with that; I'm right and I will be proved right.
We're more popular than Jesus now;
I don't know which will go first - rock and roll or Christianity.
- John Lennon

Make sure you never, never argue at night.
You just lose a good night's sleep,
and you can't settle anything until morning anyway.
- Rose Kennedy

I argue thee that love is life.
And life hath immortality.
- Emily Dickinson

When you argue with reality,
you lose - but only always.
- Byron Katie

Each of us holds a different image of God.
There are as many perspectives on
the nature of God as there are people.
However much any of us may choose to argue,
or to fight and kill, for our point of view,
the nature of God is an unanswerable question.
Perhaps there is a specific answer,
that we will never learn - in this lifetime.
Perhaps the nature of God is so complex and multifaceted
that each view of God describes an aspect of the complex whole.
Or perhaps the nature of God is actually defined by our beliefs.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner

Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer

Fasten your safety belts, clench your buttocks!
It's going be a bumpy ride!
- the movie Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (2004)

(Groom), take (Bride)'s hand and place your hand over hers.
Now, remember this moment and cherish it...
because this will be the last time you ever have the upper hand.
- Anonymous

When your friends begin to flatter
you on how young you look,
it's a sure sign you're getting old.
- Mark Twain

To keep your marriage brimming,
With love in the wedding cup,
Whenever you're wrong, admit it;
Whenever you're right, shut up.
- Ogden Nash

There's no reason to become alarmed,
and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight.
By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?
- the movie Airplane!

Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.
- Robert A. Heinlein

The key is, to not think of death as an end,
but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses.
- the movie Love and Death

When everything comes your way
you're in the wrong lane.
- Anonymous

Always forgive your enemies -
nothing annoys them so much.
- Oscar Wilde

Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes
in the hope of pulling out an eel.
- Leonardo da Vinci

The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
- Albert Einstein

Look your best - who said love is blind?
- Mae West

New Yorkers love it when you spill your guts out there.
Spill your guts at Wimbledon and they make you stop and clean it up.
- Jimmy Carter

It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel

A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend -
and he's a priest.
- Erma Bombeck

Here's a toast to your new bride who has everything a girl
could want in her life, except for good taste in men.
- Anonymous

It is a truth universally acknowledged that
when one part of your life starts going okay,
another falls spectacularly to pieces.
- the movie Bridget Jones Diary

Now, if you don't mind, I'd appreciate it if you could lower your wand.
- the movie Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban

Will the people in the cheaper seats clap your hands?
And the rest of you, if you'll just rattle your jewelry.
- John Lennon

Crazy is walking down the street
with half a cantaloupe on your head,
muttering; "I'm a hamster, I'm a hamster."
- the movie Spy Hard (1996)

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain

A true friend is one who
overlooks your failures
and tolerates your success.
- Doug Larson

A positive attitude may not solve all your problems,
but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.
- Herm Albright

As the evening beckons with the promise of tomorrow...
may your gratitude rise up and with strength answer, "yes."
- Mary Anne Radmacher

You are Never Too Old to Give or Get Gold Stars.
Show Your Honest Appreciation - Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition,
is not only a waste of energy
but the worst habit you could possibly have.
- Dale Carnegie

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute and it
seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour
and it seems like a minute. That's relativity.
- Albert Einstein

You can safely assume that you've
created God in your own image
when it turns out that God hates
all the same people you do.
- Anne Lamott

A loyal friend laughs at your jokes
when they're not so good,
and sympathizes with your problems
when they're not so bad.
- Arnold H. Glasgow

Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.
- the movie The Godfather, Part II

This is your day to Laugh at Life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Don't underestimate your abilities,
that's your boss's job.
- Anonymous

Vengeance: "It's your fault; you must pay; you must bleed."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Though I am a servant, I am not your servant.
- Ursula K. Le Guin

Trust your own instinct.
Your mistakes might as well be your own,
instead of someone else's.
- Billy Wilder

God Loves an Open Mind, Clean Hands, and a Loving Heart.
So does Your Mother.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Grit ruins clam chowder,
but enhances your character.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

What If Every Day Were Your Day -
Celebrate Whimsey Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Powerful Dreams Inspire Powerful Action.
When you can taste, smell, and touch your dreams,
you can enroll the world.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Remember, if you ever need a helping hand,
you'll find one at the end of your arm.
- Audrey Hepburn

To go against the dominant thinking of your friends,
of most of the people you see every day,
is perhaps the most difficult act of heroism you can perform.
- Theodore H. White

Never let the fear of striking out get in your way.
- Babe Ruth

Choose to soar. Choose to fly your dreams.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

When life gets you down -
just put on your big girl panties and deal with it.
- Anonymous humor

"Appeasement" is the policy of feeding your friends to a crocodile,
one at a time, in hopes that the crocodile will eat you last.
- Franklin D. Roosevelt

Knowing your own darkness is the best method
for dealing with the darknesses of other people.
- Carl Jung

Just remember, after they foreclose on your mortgage,
you get a lot more sunshine in your life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Until you've lost your reputation,
you never realize what a burden it was.
- Margaret Mitchell

Life is serious, get out your magic wand.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

You can always tell when a man's well informed.
His views are pretty much like your own.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

You know your god is man-made when he
hates all the same people you do.
- Anonymous

It is far more impressive when others
discover your good qualities without your help.
- Judith Martin

Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask "Why me?"
Then a voice answers "Nothing personal,
your name just happened to come up. -
- Charlie Brown, in Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts

A wedding is just like a funeral
except that you get to smell your own flowers.
- Grace Hansen


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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