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Let these funny Charles R. Swindoll Quotes lighten up your life. And check out the humorous quotes of many more funny authors in my large collection.
We cannot change our past.
We cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way.
We cannot change the inevitable.
The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have,
and that is our attitude.
I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me
and 90% how I react to it.
- Charles R. Swindoll
Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand 
We must become the change we wish to see in the world.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Give a man one rabbit, and he will eat for a day;
give a man two rabbits, and he will
feed his family and his neighbors
and return you 64,768 rabbits in change.
- Anonymous
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I don't believe in the after life,
although I am bringing a change of underwear.
- Woody Allen
Tradition is the illusion of permanence.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein
I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed.
- George Carlin
I was wise enough to never grow up
while fooling most people into believing I had.
- Margaret Mead
A fanatic is one who can't change his mind
and won't change the subject.
- Winston Churchill
Life's a bitch... and then you change your attitude.
- Jennifer Unlimited
If you want to make enemies,
try to change something.
- Woodrow Wilson
Goes the song, "we change, we change."
But the music is still mine.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Early in life I had to choose between honest arrogance
and hypocritical humility.
I chose the former and have seen no reason to change.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Lord, where we are wrong,
make us willing to change;
where we are right,
make us easy to live with.
- Peter Marshall
The mind has exactly the same power as the hands:
not merely to grasp the world, but to change it.
- Colin Wilson
He who rejects change is the architect of decay.
- Harold Wilson
If the facts don't fit the theory,
change the facts.
- Albert Einstein
Other people do not have to change
for us to experience peace of mind.
- Gerald Jampolsky
We must be the change we wish to see.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
No one is in control of your happiness but you;
therefore, you have the power to change anything
about yourself or your life that you want to change.
- Barbara De Angelis
To improve is to change;
to be perfect is to change often.
- Winston Churchill
The dream you are living is your creation.
It is your perception of reality that you can change at any time.
- don Miguel Ruiz
The inherent nature of life is constant change.
To fear change is to fear life itself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Nothing endures but change.
- Heraclitus
Change your thoughts, change your life.
- James Allen
When you are reluctant to change,
think of the beauty of autumn.
- V. B. Brown
What old people say you cannot do,
you try and find that you can.
Old deeds for old people, and new deeds for new.
- Henry David Thoreau
Change what you see,
by changing how you see.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Change of any sort requires courage.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Without change, there would be no butterflies.
- Anonymous
If you don't like something, change it,
If you can't change it, change your attitude
- Maya Angelou
Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama
If the only tool you have is a hammer,
you tend to see every problem as a nail.
- Abraham Maslow
Change always comes bearing gifts.
- Price Pritchett
You change your life by changing your heart.
- Max Lucado
I welcome change as a great adventure.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It is not the strongest of the species that survive,
nor the most intelligent,
but the one most responsive to change.
- Charles Darwin
Hardly a man in the world has an opinion
upon morals, political, or religion
which he got otherwise than
through his associations and sympathies.
- Mark Twain
Progress is impossible without change,
and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.
- George Bernard Shaw
The world moves, and ideas that were
once good are not always good.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
Laugh when you can,
apologize when you should,
and let go of what you can't change.
Life's too short to be anything... but happy.
- Anonymous
Old deeds for old people, and new deeds for new.
- Henry David Thoreau
The world is perfect. It's a mess.
It has always been a mess.
We are not going to change it.
Our job is to straighten out our own lives.
- Joseph Campbell
Habit is habit,
and not to be flung out of the window by any man,
but coaxed down-stairs a step at a time.
- Mark Twain
Change is the essential process of all existence.
- Spock character in Star Trek
The very nature of the world is constant change.
You set a goal and create a plan to achieve it;
then the assumptions on which you
based your plan change - they always do.
The challenge is to retain your goals
while adapting your tactics.
Relax and stay flexible in order to reach
your goals and maintain your happiness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
the courage to change the things I can;
and the wisdom to know the difference.
- Reinhold Niebuhr (Serenity Prayer)
I believe that everything happens for a reason.
People change so that you can learn to let go,
things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right,
you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself,
and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.
- Marilyn Monroe
The most effective way to cope with change
is to help create it.
- L. W. Lynett
What is it about sameness that so draws me,
and how could I begin to have
that same kind of attraction to change?
- Mary Anne Radmacher
I was taught that the way of progress
is neither swift nor easy.
- Marie Curie
Life is all a game anyway, so just change the rules.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
We humans feel an instinctive need to know
what is coming next - what we can count upon.
We fear change - even the most positive change.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
We did not change as we grew older;
we just became more clearly ourselves.
- Lynn Hall
If a man can... make a better mousetrap,
the world will make a beaten path to his door.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
When was the last time you took
a different route to work ... just because?
Consider shaking up your life a little (or a lot) ...
for no reason, except to do it.
Let your life be an adventure.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Humans are allergic to change.
They love to say, "We've always done it this way."
- Grace Hopper
When we blindly adopt a religion,
a political system, a literary dogma,
we become automatons. We cease to grow.
- Anais Nin
When the music changes, so does the dance.
- African Proverb
Re-examine all that you have been told...
dismiss that which insults your soul.
- Walt Whitman
Continuity gives us roots; change gives us branches,
letting us stretch and grow and reach new heights.
- Pauline R. Kezer
You can't change the past,
but you can ruin the present
by worrying about the future.
- Anonymous
We see what we ASSUME we will see.
If you believe the world is evil, you will see evil.
If you believe the world is good, you will see good.
To change how life looks, change how you see life -
change your expectations of life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The greatest discovery of any generation
is that a human being
can alter his life by
altering his attitude
- William James
Constant development is the law of life,
and a man who always tries to maintain his dogmas
in order to appear consistent
drives himself into a false position.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Our only security is our ability to change.
- John Lilly
The simplest questions are the most profound.
Where were you born?
Where is your home?
Where are you going?
What are you doing?
Think about these once in a while
and watch your answers change.
- Richard Bach
It is noted that a stopped clock is correct twice each day.
In a similar manner, a person who is unchanging appears wise occasionally.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
When men are easy in their circumstances,
they are naturally enemies to innovations.
- Joseph Addison
Habit and routine have an unbelievable power to waste and destroy.
- Henri de Lubac
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.