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Let these funny Unseasonable Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
In spite of unseasonable wind, snow
and unexpected weather of all sorts -
a gardener still plants.
And tends what they have planted ...
believing that Spring will come.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Heroes act in spite of their fear,
while the rest of us act because of our fear.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A hero is an ordinary individual
who finds the strength to persevere
and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles.
- Christopher Reeve
A man does what he must - in spite of personal consequences,
in spite of obstacles and dangers and pressures -
and that is the basis of all human morality.
- John F. Kennedy
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The supreme happiness of life
is the conviction of being loved for yourself,
or, more correctly, being loved in spite of yourself.
- Victor Hugo
If I am happy in spite of my deprivations,
if my happiness is so deep that it is a faith,
so thoughtful that it becomes a philosophy of life.
If, in short, I am an optimist,
my testimony to the creed of optimism is worth hearing.
- Helen Keller
...
Helen Keller (1880-1968) overcame being both deaf and blind
to become a famous author, lecturer, and activist
for women's suffrage, workers' rights, and ending war.
I keep my ideals, because in spite of everything,
I still believe that people are really good at heart.
- Anne Frank
Victory at all costs, victory in spite of all terror,
victory however long and hard the road may be;
for without victory, there is no survival.
- Winston Churchill
In spite of everything, I still believe
that people are really good at heart.
I simply can't build up my hopes on a foundation
consisting of confusion, misery and death.
- Anne Frank
Great leadership is not the visit of an unexpected fate
but rather a flame which is kept burning
in spite of the winds of risk and opposition.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
A blessed thing it is for any man or woman to have a friend,
one human soul whom we can trust utterly,
who knows the best and worst of us,
and who loves us in spite of all our faults.
- Charles Kingsley
It's really a wonder that I haven't dropped all my ideals,
because they seem so absurd and impossible to carry out.
Yet I keep them, because in spite of everything
I still believe that people are really good at heart.
- Anne Frank
The Four Stages of Public Opinion
I (Just after publication): The novelty is absurd
and subversive of Religion and Morality.
The propounder both fool and knave.
II (Twenty years later): The Novelty is absolute Truth
and will yield a full and satisfactory
explanation of things in general -
The propounder a man of sublime genius and perfect virtue.
III (Forty years later): The Novelty won't explain
things in general after all, and therefore is a wretched failure.
The propounder a very ordinary person advertised by a clique.
IV (A century later): The Novelty a mixture of truth and error.
Explains as much as could reasonably be expected.
The propounder worthy of all honor
in spite of his share of human frailties,
as one who has added to the permanent possessions of science.
- Thomas Henry [T. H.] Huxley
No one was ever named "Hero" for following the crowd.
Heroes set their own course.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The common denominator of our heroes
is that each set their own course.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
My heroes are the ones who survived doing it wrong,
who made mistakes, but recovered from them.
- Bono
Genuine heroes - no batteries needed -
bring lots of open-mind and at least a little courage.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Heroes do what the rest of us would do,
if only we had the courage.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The world is moved along, not only
by the mighty shoves of its heroes,
but also by the aggregate of tiny pushes
of each honest worker.
- Helen Keller
If you want to be heroic,
Don't emulate your heroes,
learn from them.
Heroes don't follow anyone,
they set their own course.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Not all Heroes wear capes.
- On an Apple Inc. "Genius Bar" T-shirt
A hero may or may not lead other people,
but all heroes lead themselves.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
True courage is not the brutal force of vulgar heroes,
but the firm resolve of virtue and reason.
- Alfred North Whitehead
Use heroes as a springboard for inquiry
into the identity and nature of admirably human qualities.
Do not judge heroes -
neither to put them unquestioningly on a pedestal
nor to unkindly probe their flaws.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer
Television has a real problem. They have no page two.
- Art Buchwald
A honeymoon should be like a table:
four bare legs and no drawers.
- Anonymous
No one knows what's next, but everybody does it.
- George Carlin
No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous
Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son.
- the movie National Lampoon's Animal House (1978)
A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler
Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove
Marriage has no guarantees.
If that's what you're looking for,
go live with a car battery.
- Erma Bombeck
There's no reason to become alarmed,
and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight.
By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?
- the movie Airplane!
No one can have a higher opinion of you than I have,
and I think you're a slimy, contemptible sewer rat!
- the movie The Great Mouse Detective
I have no fear of the gallows ... They're going to shoot me.
- the movie Love and Death
No matter how much cats fight,
there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
- Abraham Lincoln
One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain
And you just gotta remember, Sparky -
no matter what they tell you - you can NEVER have too much sugar.
- the movie Michael (1996)
Oh no, I can't do anything to the death.
Doctor's orders. You see, I have this ulcer condition,
and death is the worst thing for it.
- the movie Love and Death
When I eventually met Mr. Right
I had no idea that his first name was Always.
- Rita Rudner
There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist.
- Mark Twain
Science may have found a cure for most evils;
but it has found no remedy for the worst of them all -
the apathy of human beings.
- Helen Keller
The way to silence religious disputes is to take no notice of them.
- Thomas Jefferson
Every one desires to live long,
but no one would be old.
- Abraham Lincoln
An excellent man;
he has no enemies;
and none of his friends like him.
- Oscar Wilde
No problem is so formidable that
you can't walk away from it.
- Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts
Clothes make the man.
Naked people have little or no influence on society.
- Mark Twain
When all think alike, no one is thinking very much.
- Walter Lippmann
The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous
In theory there is no difference between theory and practice.
In practice there is.
- Yogi Berra
Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed.
- Mark Twain
You have no values. With you its all nihilism,
cynicism, sarcasm, and orgasm.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
He who loves 50 people has 50 woes;
he who loves no one has no woes.
- The Buddha
Random chance seems to have operated in our favor ...
there was no deity involved.
- Spock character in the Star Trek television series
Less is only more where more is no good.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
The universe we observe has precisely
the properties we should expect
if there is, at bottom, no design,
no purpose, no evil, no good,
nothing but blind, pitiless indifference.
- Charles Darwin
There is no such thing as public opinion.
There is only published opinion.
- Winston Churchill
Faced with the choice between changing one's mind
and proving that there is no need to do so,
almost everyone gets busy on the proof.
- John Kenneth Galbraith
Early in life I had to choose between honest arrogance
and hypocritical humility.
I chose the former and have seen no reason to change.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
I am no longer young enough to know everything.
- Oscar Wilde
There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie
The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears,
for there's no risk of accident for someone who's dead.
- Albert Einstein
It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel
Computers are like Old Testament gods;
lots of rules and no mercy.
- Joseph Campbell
If at first you don't succeed,
try, try, and try again.
Then give up.
There's no use being a damned fool about it.
- W. C. Fields
A clever man commits no minor blunders.
- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Experience keeps a dear school,
but fools will learn in no other.
- Benjamin Franklin
It is the things for which there is no evidence
that are believed with passion.
- Bertrand Russell
It has been my experience that folks who
have no vices, have very few virtues.
- Abraham Lincoln
Some people are so heavenly minded
that they are no earthly good.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.