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Let these funny Tangible Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
A reporter is always concerned with tomorrow.
There's nothing tangible of yesterday.
All I can say I've done is
agitate the air ten or fifteen minutes
and then boom - it's gone.
- Edward R. Murrow
Well, when you come down to it,
I don't see that a reporter could do much to a president, do you?
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
Well, you ask a silly question, and you get a silly answer.
- Tom Lehrer
You're already a bastard.
Might as well be an enlightened one.
- the movie Simon Birch
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- Winston Churchill
Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed.
- Mark Twain
A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother
why the bride changed her mind.
What do you mean? responded her mother.
Well, she went down the aisle with one man,
and came back with another.
- Anonymous
If everything seems to be going well,
you have obviously overlooked something.
- Anonymous
You can always tell when a man's well informed.
His views are pretty much like your own.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
It's not very heroic to slay dragons.
Dragons are generally very peaceful and well behaved.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Well excuse me - we've got something
a little unusual going on here -
time travel, parallel universes,
or just a little common ordinary insanity.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Thank God men cannot fly, and lay waste
the sky as well as the earth.
- Henry David Thoreau
Trust your own instinct.
Your mistakes might as well be your own,
instead of someone else's.
- Billy Wilder
You may as well laugh at life,
because it's certainly laughing at you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
What would be the use of immortality to a person
who cannot use well a half an hour.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
I find that principles have no real force
except when one is well fed.
- Mark Twain
A well-developed sense of humor
is the pole that adds balance to your steps,
as you walk the tightrope of life.
- William Arthur Ward
Trust your own inner guidance.
Have faith that your steps are
carrying you toward your dreams.
Keep your eyes on the heavens
and believe that your feet will carry you well.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The simplification of life is one of the steps to inner peace.
A persistent simplification will create an inner and outer well-being
that places harmony in one's life.
- Peace Pilgrim
Life is a dangerous - ultimately fatal - endeavor,
so you may as well live it full out.
Chart your course, cast off the lines,
and boldly sail the seas of life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Being angry harms your physical,
emotional, and spiritual well-being.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Never trust a man who speaks well of everybody
- John Churton Collins
Hold on... Joyfully.
Holding-on does not have to be
a desperate teeth-gritting kind of holding-on.
Holding-on can be a joyful
"this is just the nature of Life,
so I may as well enjoy it"
kind of holding-on.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If a man is called to be a street sweeper,
he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted,
or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry.
He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts
of heaven and earth will pause to say,
here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Treat the earth well.
It was not given to you by your parents,
it was loaned to you by your children.
We do not inherit the Earth from our Ancestors,
we borrow it from our Children.
- Native American traditional
Imagine for yourself a character,
a model personality whose example you determine to follow,
in private as well as in public.
- Epictetus
Whatever your life's work is, do it well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Well-behaved women seldom make history.
- Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
We have nearly complete misunderstanding between
people of different faiths in Lake Wobegon,
and that's probably one reason why we get along so very well.
It's when you are trying to convince another person to think
the same way that you do that there is
friction and trouble between people.
But when you feel that the other person is
dumber than dirt, too dumb for words -
why waste your breath - you get along pretty well.
There's no bond between people that's quite so strong as
when people each feel slightly superior towards the other one.
- Garrison Keillor
Hatred is blind, as well as love.
- Oscar Wilde
Live Well, Love Much, Laugh Often.
- Anonymous
I distrust those people who know so well
what God wants them to do,
because I notice it always coincides
with their own desires.
- Susan B. Anthony
Nothing is ever going to work out the way you want,
so you may as well choose to want the way life does work out.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is not about how fast you run
or how high you climb
but how well you bounce.
- Vivian Komori
Always aim at complete harmony
of thought and word and deed.
Always aim at purifying your thoughts
and everything will be well.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
You are defined by your habits - choose well.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Before we acquire great power
we must acquire wisdom to use it well.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Look well into thyself; there is a source of strength
which will always spring up if thou wilt always look there.
- Marcus Aurelius
It is well to remember that the
entire population of the universe,
with one trifling exception, is composed of others.
- Andrew J. Holmes
Have the will to be well, to be happy, and to live in joy.
- Ernest Holmes
Art for art's sake is a philosophy of the well-fed.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Character is higher than intellect.
A great soul will be strong to live as well as think.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
A friend may well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The fact is, that to do anything in the world worth doing,
we must not stand back shivering and thinking of the cold and danger,
but jump in and scramble through as well as we can.
- Robert Cushing
If you can't explain it simply,
you don't understand it well enough.
- Albert Einstein
The part can never be well unless the whole is well.
- Plato
See God in every person, place, and thing,
and all will be well in your world.
- Louise L. Hay
If you want something to be different than it is,
you might as well teach a cat to bark.
Wanting something to be different than it is, is hopeless.
- Byron Katie
A well-spent day brings happy sleep.
- Leonardo da Vinci
There is no point at which you can say,
"Well, I'm successful now.
I might as well take a nap."
- Carrie Fisher
It is not enough to have a good mind,
the main thing is to use it well.
- Rene Descartes
It is better to travel well than to arrive.
- The Buddha
When the well's dry, we know the worth of water.
- Benjamin Franklin
All's well that ends well.
- Proverb (and title of a Shakespeare play)
Well-being is making its way to you at all times.
If you will relax and find a way to allow it,
it will be your experience.
- Abraham (Esther Hicks)
The reward of a thing well done, is to have done it.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Everybody needs beauty as well as bread.
- John Muir
Whatever your life's work is, do it well.
A man should do his job so well that the living,
the dead, and the unborn could do it no better.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
As a well-spent day brings happy sleep,
so a life well spent brings happy death.
- Leonardo da Vinci
Your point of view sets you up well in advance
for how you view the events as they unfold.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Violence, even well intentioned,
always rebounds upon oneself.
- Lao Tzu
Learn to do common things uncommonly well;
we must always keep in mind that anything
that helps fill the dinner pail is valuable.
- George Washington Carver
The hardest of all, is learning to be
a well of affection, and not a fountain,
to show them that we love them,
not when we feel like it, but when they do.
- Nan Fairbrother
Good men must not obey the laws too well.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Doing well is the result of doing good.
That's what capitalism is all about.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
- Dave Barry
Well done is better than well said.
- Benjamin Franklin
The well-timed question is more impacting than an answer.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Appreciation is a wonderful thing.
It makes what is excellent in others belong to us as well.
- Voltaire
How many things there are concerning which we might
well deliberate whether we had better know them.
- Henry David Thoreau
If there is anything that a man can do well,
I say let him do it. Give him a chance.
- Abraham Lincoln
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.