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Let these funny Suggestions Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
I don't like to think of laws
as rules you have to follow,
but more as suggestions.
- George Carlin
Many of us have been conditioned to trust others' opinions
more than our own, and I believe that sort of trust is excessive.
This is especially true with regard to authority figures -
doctors, lawyers, priests. I trust my doctor's intentions toward me,
but I don't blindly follow his suggestions
without checking other sources also.
He was trained to prescribe a pill for everything,
and does it with the best of intentions,
but I often choose to trust God's quiet voice inside me
rather than my doctor's medical advice.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
An unsolicited suggestion is
undistinguishable from a criticism.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Unsolicited Advice Is Always Meddling.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde
In those days he was wiser than he is now;
he used to frequently take my advice.
- Winston Churchill
Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer
but wish we didn't.
- Erica Jong
He who can take advice is sometimes superior
to him who can give it.
- Erica Jong
My advice to you is get married:
if you find a good wife you'll be happy;
if not, you'll become a philosopher.
- Socrates
I always pass on good advice.
It is the only thing to do with it.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde
She generally gave herself very good advice,
(though she very seldom followed it).
- Lewis Carroll
Advice is seldom welcome,
and those who need it the most, like it the least.
- Lord Chesterfield
If the Almighty were to rebuild the world and asked me for advice,
I would have English Channels round every country.
And the atmosphere would be such that
anything which attempted to fly would be set on fire.
- Winston Churchill
Many receive advice, only the wise profit from it.
- Publilius Syrus
Parents can only give good advice or put them on the right paths,
but the final forming of a person's character lies in their own hands.
- Anne Frank
A friend encourages your dreams and offers advice -
but when you don't follow it,
they still respect and love you.
- Doris Wild Helmering
No one can give you better advice than yourself.
- Cicero
How true Daddy's words were when he said:
all children must look after their own upbringing.
Parents can only give good advice
or put them on the right paths,
but the final forming of a person's character
lies in their own hands.
- Anne Frank
You are perfect. You are complete.
Your inner voice always knows what to do,
but it is a quiet voice.
You can only hear the whisperings of your inner voice -
your inner compass - when you turn down the volume
of your fears, your regrets, your resentments,
and the fear-based advice
your neighbors are so willing to give you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
There are old heads in the world
who cannot help me by their example or advice
to live worthily and satisfactorily to myself;
but I believe that it is in my power
to elevate myself this very hour
above the common level of my life.
- Henry David Thoreau
The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec
Life is like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute -
only the last couple seconds are fatal,
but most people are scared to death the whole way down.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I don't want to move to a city where the only cultural advantage
is being able to make a right turn on a red light.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall
You ask me if I keep a notebook
to record my great ideas.
I've only ever had one.
- Albert Einstein
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin
Oh, if only God would give me some sign.
If He would just speak to me once. Anything.
One sentence. Two words. If He would just cough.
- the movie Love and Death
Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born
at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.
- Mark Twain
The attempt to combine wisdom and power
has only rarely been successful and then only for a short while.
- Albert Einstein
It is only the poor who pay cash,
and that not from virtue,
but because they are refused credit.
- Anatole France
The claim "I was only following orders" has been used
to justify too many tragedies in our history.
- Captain Picard of the television series
STAR TREK: The Next Generation
Boys will be boys. And even that wouldn't matter
if only we could prevent girls from being girls.
- Anne Frank
There are three hundred and sixty-four days
when you might get un-birthday presents,
and only one for birthday presents, you know.
- Lewis Carroll
The only advantage of not being too good a housekeeper
is that your guests are so pleased
to feel how very much better they are.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
The essence of all religions is one.
Only their approaches are different.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Only a fool tests the depth of the water with both feet.
- African Proverb
The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education.
- Albert Einstein
Love is only a dirty trick played on us
to achieve continuation of the species.
- W. Somerset Maugham
Life only
appears to be
rushing toward us
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I've developed a new philosophy...
I only dread one day at a time.
- the character Charlie Brown in Charles M. Schulz' Peanuts comic
A doctor can bury his mistakes
but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
I believe totally in a Capitalist System,
I only wish that someone would try it.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
I only wish that ordinary people
had an unlimited capacity for doing harm;
then they might have an unlimited power for doing good.
- Socrates
Advertisements contain the only truths
to be relied on in a newspaper.
- Thomas Jefferson
There is no such thing as public opinion.
There is only published opinion.
- Winston Churchill
The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
- George Carlin
Too often the strong, silent man is silent only because
he does not know what to say, and is reputed strong
only because he has remained silent.
- Winston Churchill
The reason I talk to myself is because
I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
- George Carlin
There is only one thing about which I am certain,
and that is that there is very little
about which one can be certain.
- W. Somerset Maugham
Politics is almost as exciting as war, and quite as dangerous.
In war you can only be killed once, but in politics many times.
- Winston Churchill
You are only young once,
but you can stay immature indefinitely.
- Anonymous
The only true love is love at first sight;
second sight dispels it.
- Israel Zangwill
If you want total security, go to prison.
There you're fed, clothed, given medical care and so on.
The only thing lacking... is freedom.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
Magic is natural to Wizards,
and only a little harder for the rest of us.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Things may come to those who wait,
but only the things left by those who hustle.
- Abraham Lincoln
Human beings are the only creatures on the planet
who tell time and think they have to earn a living.
- Buckminster Fuller
I never make stupid mistakes.
Only very, very clever ones.
- John Peel
Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition,
is not only a waste of energy
but the worst habit you could possibly have.
- Dale Carnegie
Only dead fish swim with the stream.
- Anonymous
Nothing in life is to be feared.
It is only to be understood.
- Marie Curie
Money is better than poverty,
if only for financial reasons.
- Woody Allen
Only two things are infinite,
the universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein
The physician can bury his mistakes,
but the architect can only advise his client to plant vines -
so they should go as far as possible from home
to build their first buildings.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Less is only more where more is no good.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely
only after they have exhausted all other alternatives.
- Abba Eban
If the only prayer you said in your whole life was,
Thank you, that would suffice.
- Meister Eckhart
Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.
- Robert F. Kennedy
We have only this moment,
sparkling like a star in our hand -
and melting like a snowflake.
- Marie B. Ray
People only see what they are prepared to see.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Majority rule only works if you're also
considering individual rights,
because you can't have five wolves and one sheep
voting on what to have for dinner.
- Larry Flynt
You're only here for a short visit.
Don't hurry. Don't worry.
And be sure to smell the flowers along the way.
- Walter Hagen
One can not reflect in streaming water.
Only those who know internal peace can give it to others.
- Lao Tzu
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.