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Funny Seasons Quotes
Funny Quotes about Seasons

Let these funny Seasons Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Honor diversity in all seasons.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

And you would accept the seasons of your heart
just as you have always accepted
that seasons pass over your fields
and you would watch with serenity
through the winters of your grief.
- Khalil Gibran

May love and laughter light your days,
and warm your heart and home.
May good and faithful friends be yours,
wherever you may roam.
May peace and plenty bless your world
with joy that long endures.
May all life's passing seasons
bring the best to you and yours.
- Irish Blessing

If we are not happy and joyous at this season,
for what other season shall we wait and
for what other time shall we look?
- Abdul-Baha


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Give thanks for the rainbows, for the butterflies,
for all God's creatures - large and small,
for the bright blue sky and the soft fog and the gentle rain,
for the tree veiled in the season's first frost,
for the baby's laugh, for the touch of a hand
and the whispered "I love you."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Endings: sometimes a season of sorrow and grief.
Endings: what must precede new beginnings.
Life is an endless cycle of endings and beginnings.
Renewal and rebirth cannot occur without endings -
as the new year's crop can only be planted and flourish
in the decay of last year.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

To everything there is a season,
and a time to every purpose under heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die.
- Ecclesiastes 3:1


 

The season of failure is the best time
for sowing the seeds of success.
- Paramahansa Yogananda

Our "Rainbows and Butterflies" are the small miracles of our life -
the little things that are so easy to overlook,
yet so awe inspiring when we take a moment
to notice and to pay attention.
Give thanks for the rainbows, for the butterflies,
for all God's creatures - large and small,
for the bright blue sky and the soft fog and the gentle rain,
for the tree veiled in the season's first frost,
for the baby's laugh,
for the touch of a hand and the whispered "I love you."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Love is a fruit in season at all times,
and within reach of every hand.
- Mother Teresa

May your season shine with delight and surprise.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

The ending of a job or a relationship
may appear as the darkest night,
but it is merely the Winter season -
the time of renewal and rebirth
that precedes the new planting -
the beginning of the next great cycle.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The holiday season promotes
a heightened sense of community.
It draws our chins up and
helps us look above and over
the limiting fence of our own events,
activities and preoccupations.
The opportunity for a heroic gesture
can tap you quietly on the shoulder
in the midst of a holiday bustle.
If you are attentive,
you will notice the gentle touch
and will be able to respond. Remember...
There are no small acts of kindness.
Every compassionate act makes large the world.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

I think one of the finest gifts I can give
my friends in the holiday season is to pause
with a long enough quality to actually SEE them.
My calm, unhurried presence communicates
this gift of a message, "I see you. I recognize you.
I remember our times of together
and am contributing right now to another quality memory.
I value you and honor and take the time,
right this moment to pause long enough to truly notice you."
- Mary Anne Radmacher

We are born at a given moment, in a given place and,
like vintage years of wine, we have the qualities of the year
and of the season of which we are born.
Astrology does not lay claim to anything more.
- Carl Jung

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand

It's not the size of the dog in the fight,
it's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Mark Twain

"It's not that important,
don't worry about it" is the answer,
now what was the question?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- the movie The Matrix (1999)

Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer

DON'T get officious.
You're not yourself when you're officious -
That is the curse of a government job.
- the movie Harold and Maude (1971)

Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West

Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of ...
about me not listening to her, or something.
I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
- the movie Dumb & Dumber (1994)

No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous

Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.
- Robert A. Heinlein

If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.
- Anonymous

Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein

I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
- Will Rogers

One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill

Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire

The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

I'm not used to feeling so human.
Is it always like this?
- Edward, from Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer

Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove

Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
and I'm not sure about the universe.
- Albert Einstein

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain

The key is, to not think of death as an end,
but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses.
- the movie Love and Death

Marriage is a fine institution -
but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
- Mae West

It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel

I'm not talking about lust.
A woman in lust wants chocolate.
A woman in love wants diamonds.
- the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland

Damn it boss, I like you too much not to say it.
You've got everything except one thing: madness!
- the movie Zorba The Greek

Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein

Personally, I'm always ready to learn,
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill

I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
- Anonymous

It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous

The lawyer's truth is not Truth,
but consistency or a consistent expediency.
- Henry David Thoreau

Contrary to general belief,
I do not believe that friends are necessarily
the people you like best,
they are merely the people who got there first.
- Peter Ustinov

If Christ were here now there is one thing
he would not be - a Christian.
- Mark Twain

When dealing with people, remember you are
not dealing with creatures of logic,
but creatures of emotion.
- Dale Carnegie

A positive attitude may not solve all your problems,
but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.
- Herm Albright

Only two things are infinite,
the universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein

The faith that stands on authority is not faith.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

I once had a rose named after me
and I was very flattered.
But I was not pleased to read
the description in the catalogue:
no good in a bed, but fine up against a wall.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Faith: not wanting to know what is true.
- Friedrich Nietzsche

The trouble with the world is not
that people know too little,
but that they know so many things that ain't so.
- Mark Twain

Do not bite at the bait of pleasure,
till you know there is no hook beneath it.
- Thomas Jefferson

We are finally driven to monogamy
not by morality but by exhaustion.
- Erica Jong

I do not believe in using women in combat,
because females are too fierce.
- Margaret Mead

Politics is such a torment that I advise everyone
I love not to mix with it.
- Thomas Jefferson

Normal is not something to aspire to,
it's something to get away from.
- Jodie Foster

Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition,
is not only a waste of energy
but the worst habit you could possibly have.
- Dale Carnegie

The wine of youth does not always
clear with advancing years;
sometimes it grows turbid.
- Carl Jung

I'm sure we all agree that we ought to love one another
and I know there are people in the world
that do not love their fellow human beings
and I HATE people like that.
- Tom Lehrer

Do not laugh much or often or unrestrainedly.
- Epictetus

It's not very heroic to slay dragons.
Dragons are generally very peaceful and well behaved.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I want to be the white man's brother, not his brother-in-law.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

For centuries, theologians have been explaining
the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.
- H. L. Mencken

The mind is not a vessel to be filled
but a fire to be kindled.
- Plutarch

The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet
and steady and loyal and enduring a nature
that it will last through a whole lifetime,
if not asked to lend money.
- Mark Twain


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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