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Let these funny Sea Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Love one another but make not a bond of love.
Let it rather be a moving sea
between the shores of your souls.
- Khalil Gibran
You can't cross the sea merely by
standing and staring at the water.
- Rabindranath Tagore 
A ship in port is safe,
but that's not what ships are built for.
Sail out to sea and do new things.
- Grace Hopper
We must free ourselves of the hope
that the sea will ever rest.
We must learn to sail in high winds.
- Aristotle Onassis
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If you may count every drop of water in the ocean and
count every grain of sand in the sea -
multiply it by a thousand and that's how much I love you.
- George of Langkloof
It is always with excitement that I wake up in the morning
wondering what my intuition
will toss up to me, like gifts from the sea.
I work with it and rely on it. It's my partner.
- Jonas Salk
The water in a vessel is sparkling;
the water in the sea is dark.
The small truth has words which are clear;
the great truth has great silence.
- Rabindranath Tagore
We are tied to the ocean.
And when we go back to the sea,
whether it is to sail or to watch -
we are going back from whence we came.
- John F. Kennedy
The boisterous sea of liberty is never without a wave.
- Thomas Jefferson
Timid men prefer the calm of despotism
to the tempestuous sea of liberty.
- Thomas Jefferson
My life is the eye of the hurricane -
an island of calm in a sea of uncertainty.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Talk not of the river or lake
To those who have looked on the sea.
- Ella Wheeler Wilcox
Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm.
- Publilius Syrus
What each must seek in his life never was on land or sea.
It is something out of his own unique potentiality for experience,
something that never has been and never could
have been experienced by anyone else.
- Joseph Campbell
People travel to wonder at the height of mountains,
at the huge waves of the sea,
at the long courses of rivers,
at the vast compass of the ocean,
at the circular motion of the stars;
and they pass by themselves without wondering.
- St. Augustine
If we fail to plan, we merely bob helplessly -
like a cork on the sea of life.
If we resist whatever life delivers to us,
we create untold misery for ourselves.
If we act with vision and commitment,
and then accept whatever Spirit provides,
we live a life of purpose and joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Gather yourself by the sea shore and I will love you there.
Assemble yourself with wild things,
with songs of the sparrow and sea-foam.
Let mad beauty collect itself in your eyes
and it will shine - Calling me.
For I long for a man with nests of wild things in his hair.
A man who will Kiss the Flame.
- Jewel
I sail the seas of life as the MASTER of my ship.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Know that you sail the seas of life
as the master of your own ship.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is a dangerous - ultimately fatal - endeavor,
so you may as well live it full out.
Chart your course, cast off the lines,
and boldly sail the seas of life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Trust your heart if the seas catch fire,
live by love though the stars walk backward.
- e. e. cummings
I am not afraid of storms
for I am learning how to sail my ship.
- Louisa May Alcott
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed
by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do.
So throw off the bowlines.
Sail away from the safe harbor.
Catch the trade winds in your sails.
Explore. Dream. Discover.
- widely misattributed to Mark Twain
To reach a port, we must sail -
sail, not tie at anchor - sail, not drift.
- Franklin D. Roosevelt quoting Oliver Wendell Holmes
Greatness is not in where we stand,
but in what direction we are moving.
We must sail sometimes with the wind
and sometimes against it -
but sail we must,
and not drift, nor lie at anchor.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
Honor your past, and all the consequences of that past.
Receive insight into relieving the pain
caused by past experiences and current attitudes toward life.
Observe life as it currently appears,
and then train yourself to observe life
from other perspectives that support a higher quality of living.
Re-consider your priorities.
Chart your Course.
Set Sail with Courage.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If you want to be happy,
put your effort into controlling the sail, not the wind.
- Anonymous
Taking inspiration from the powerful vision of my future,
I boldly set sail with courage and intent.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I Act with Bold Courage -
Taking inspiration from the powerful vision of my future,
I boldly set sail with courage and intent.
I hold my course with focused attention and relentless commitment,
as I weather the storms of life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand
Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer
It's not the size of the dog in the fight,
it's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Mark Twain
"It's not that important,
don't worry about it" is the answer,
now what was the question?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- the movie The Matrix (1999)
Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of ...
about me not listening to her, or something.
I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
- the movie Dumb & Dumber (1994)
One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill
Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire
Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
and I'm not sure about the universe.
- Albert Einstein
I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
- Anonymous
The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
The key is, to not think of death as an end,
but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses.
- the movie Love and Death
I'm not talking about lust.
A woman in lust wants chocolate.
A woman in love wants diamonds.
- the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain
DON'T get officious.
You're not yourself when you're officious -
That is the curse of a government job.
- the movie Harold and Maude (1971)
Personally, I'm always ready to learn,
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill
Marriage is a fine institution -
but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
- Mae West
Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
- Will Rogers
Damn it boss, I like you too much not to say it.
You've got everything except one thing: madness!
- the movie Zorba The Greek
No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous
Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein
It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous
Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein
In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland
Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.
- Robert A. Heinlein
I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln
Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove
It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel
I'm not used to feeling so human.
Is it always like this?
- Edward, from Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer
If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.
- Anonymous
Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West
The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous
I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man,
and I hate people like that!
- Tom Lehrer
Normal is not something to aspire to,
it's something to get away from.
- Jodie Foster
It's not a mess.
It's a physical manifestation of
a wonderfully complex ability to
assess and compartmentalize information.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
One does not discover new lands without consenting
to lose sight of the shore for a very long time.
- Andre Gide
If you can not answer a man's argument,
all is not lost; you can still call him vile names.
- Elbert Hubbard
One minute you're in the lunchroom at Glenwood High
and you ... blink and you're 40,
you blink again and you can see movies
at half price on a senior citizen's pass.
Ask not for whom the bell tolls, or to put it more accurately,
ask not for whom the toilet flushes.
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity
Do not take life too seriously.
You will never get out of it alive.
- Elbert Hubbard
Confused Memories of Childhood:
Hate to my father, cruel hate,
confused with love - a mix not great.
The man I love - the man I hate;
the man I want to emulate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
What sane person could live in this world and not be crazy?
- Ursula K. Le Guin
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.