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Let these funny Polished Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
The gem cannot be polished without friction,
nor man perfected without trials.
- Confucius
The man who can't dance thinks the band is no good.
- Polish Proverb
Stay hopeless and confused. Keep polishing those skills.
- the movie When a Man Loves a Woman (1994)
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
- Phyllis Diller
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You are only young once,
but you can stay immature indefinitely.
- Anonymous
A big part of letting go is recognizing
when it is time to stay in a situation
and when it is time to move on.
- Darren L. Johnson
Stay Happy, never let anyone get your goat.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I was thinking that I might fly today.
Just to disprove all the things you say...
please be careful with me, I'm sensitive,
and I'd like to stay that way.
- Jewel
To achieve success, stay relaxed - not stressed.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If there ever comes a day when we can't be together,
keep me in your heart, I'll stay there forever.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
You can't stay in your corner of the Forest waiting for others to come to you.
You have to go to them sometimes.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Some people come into our lives and quickly go.
Some people stay for awhile,
and move our souls to dance.
They awaken us to a new understanding,
leave footprints on our hearts,
and we are never, ever the same.
- Flavia Weedn
Stay Alert, and doors will open.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Stay in the moment and all gifts are added
as you breathe and take inspired action.
- Joe Vitale
To keep your thinking young, stay curious.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Love wasn't put in your heart to stay.
Love isn't love until you give it away.
- Michael W. Smith
Stay at the center
and let all things take their course.
- Lao Tzu
Stay committed to your decisions,
but stay flexible in your approach.
- Tony Robbins
It's not that I'm so smart,
it's just that I stay with problems longer.
- Albert Einstein
Study nature, love nature,
stay close to nature. It will never fail you.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
The very nature of the world is constant change.
You set a goal and create a plan to achieve it;
then the assumptions on which you
based your plan change - they always do.
The challenge is to retain your goals
while adapting your tactics.
Relax and stay flexible in order to reach
your goals and maintain your happiness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I would rather try to persuade a man to go along,
because once I have persuaded him, he will stick.
If I scare him, he will stay just as long
as he is scared, and then he is gone.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
I have never found a companion that was
so companionable as solitude.
We are for the most part more lonely
when we go abroad among men
than when we stay in our chambers.
A man thinking or working is always alone,
let him be where he will.
- Henry David Thoreau
This life is what you make it.
Not matter what, you're going to mess up sometimes,
it's a universal truth.
But the good part is,
you get to decide how you're going to mess it up.
Girls will be your friends - they'll act like it anyway.
But just remember, some come, some go.
The ones that stay with you through everything -
they're your true best friends.
Don't let go of them.
Also remember, sisters make the best friends in the world.
- Marilyn Monroe
The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde
Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz
You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire
Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
- Edgar Bergen
You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly,
but I bet you ain't never seen a DONKEY fly!
- the movie Shrek (2001)
Never call an accountant a credit to his profession;
a good accountant is a debit to his profession.
- Charles Lyell
I read that you should never go out with someone
if you can think of three reasons why you shouldn't.
- the movie Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason (2004)
I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
- Winston Churchill
We have a great life here in Alaska,
and we're never going back to America again!
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)
And you just gotta remember, Sparky -
no matter what they tell you - you can NEVER have too much sugar.
- the movie Michael (1996)
Never stir up litigation.
A worse man can scarcely be found than one who does this.
- Abraham Lincoln
Some things will never seem adequate
no matter how hard we try.
- from the movie White Man's Burden
I always pass on good advice.
It is the only thing to do with it.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde
You are Never Too Old to Give or Get Gold Stars.
Show Your Honest Appreciation - Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The savage in man is never quite eradicated.
- Henry David Thoreau
I would never want to be a member of a group
whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
- George Carlin
Never give a sword to a man who can't dance.
- Confucius
TEAMWORK...means never having to take all the blame yourself.
- Anonymous
Eating words has never given me indigestion.
- Winston Churchill
Never trust spiritual leader who doesn't dance.
- Miyagi: character in the movie The Next Karate Kid
Never put off till tomorrow
what you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Mark Twain
I have great hopes that we shall love each other all our lives
as much as if we had never married at all.
- Lord Byron
One should always be in love.
That is the reason one should never marry.
- Oscar Wilde
The way for a young man to rise is
to improve himself in every way he can,
never suspecting that anybody wishes to hinder him.
- Abraham Lincoln
I was wise enough to never grow up
while fooling most people into believing I had.
- Margaret Mead
Never try to teach a pig to sing.
It wastes your time, and it annoys the pig.
- Mark Twain
One can never consent to creep when one feels the impulse to soar.
- Helen Keller
Do not take life too seriously.
You will never get out of it alive.
- Elbert Hubbard
Life is never fair, and perhaps it is a good thing
for most of us that it is not.
- Oscar Wilde
One should never know too precisely
whom one has married
- Friedrich Nietzsche
You never can tell with bees.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Things have never been more like the way they are today in history.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
A person who never made a mistake
never tried anything new.
- Albert Einstein
Never let the fear of striking out get in your way.
- Babe Ruth
The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.
- Oscar Wilde
My father always told me that
all businessmen were sons of bitches,
but I never believed it till now.
- John F. Kennedy
I never considered a difference of opinion
in politics, in religion, in philosophy,
as cause for withdrawing from a friend.
- Thomas Jefferson
It's never too late -
never too late to start over,
never too late to be happy.
- Jane Fonda
People who want to share their religious views with you
almost never want you to share yours with them.
- Dave Barry
One should never trust a woman who tells her real age.
If she tells that, she'll tell anything.
- Oscar Wilde
Until you've lost your reputation,
you never realize what a burden it was.
- Margaret Mitchell
Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller
Man's nature is not essentially evil.
Brute nature has been known to
yield to the influence of love.
You must never despair of human nature.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Conscience is a mother-in-law whose visit never ends.
- H. L. Mencken
Which form of proverb do you prefer
Better late than never, or Better never than late?
- Lewis Carroll
I never make stupid mistakes.
Only very, very clever ones.
- John Peel
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.