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Let these funny Persuasion Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Thaw with her gentle persuasion is more powerful
than Thor with his hammer.
The one melts, the other breaks into pieces.
- Henry David Thoreau
The great enemy of the truth is very often not the lie,
deliberate, contrived and dishonest,
but the myth, persistent, persuasive and unrealistic.
- John F. Kennedy
To be persuasive, we must be believable;
to be believable, we must be credible;
to be credible, we must be truthful.
- Edward R. Murrow
Truthful words are not beautiful;
beautiful words are not truthful.
Good words are not persuasive;
persuasive words are not good.
- Lao Tzu
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I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
I am prepared to meet my Maker.
Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal
of meeting me is another matter.
- Winston Churchill
One great thing about getting old is that
you can get out of all sorts of social obligations
just by saying you're too tired.
- George Carlin
It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous
We have a great life here in Alaska,
and we're never going back to America again!
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)
You ask me if I keep a notebook
to record my great ideas.
I've only ever had one.
- Albert Einstein
The time-traveling is just too dangerous.
Better that I devote myself to study
the other great mystery of the universe - women!
- the movie Back to the Future II
Hey, Marge. Isn't it great being married
to someone who's recklessly impulsive?
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)
People who think they know everything
are a great annoyance to those of us who do.
- Isaac Asimov
To the young child, all life is a great adventure -
when did we grow so dull and brittle.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Confused Memories of Childhood:
Hate to my father, cruel hate,
confused with love - a mix not great.
The man I love - the man I hate;
the man I want to emulate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I begin with the principle that all men are bores.
Surely no one will prove himself
so great a bore as to contradict me in this.
- Soren Kierkegaard
Who in the world am I? Ah, that's the great puzzle.
- Lewis Carroll
As usual, there is a great woman behind every idiot.
- John Lennon
I have great hopes that we shall love each other all our lives
as much as if we had never married at all.
- Lord Byron
No one can have a higher opinion of you than I have,
and I think you're a slimy, contemptible sewer rat!
- the movie The Great Mouse Detective
I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner
New York City is a great monument
to the power of money and greed...
a race for rent.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
I always seem to get inspiration and renewed vitality
by contact with this great novel land of yours
which sticks up out of the Atlantic.
- Winston Churchill
The essence of life is not in
the great victories and grand failures,
but in the simple joys.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If (s)he's an apple and you're an orange,
celebrate your differences -
make a great fruit salad.
Love isn't about being the same -
it's about being sweet with each other.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The magic words for a great relationship are,
"I love you just the way you are."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Where there is great love,
there are always miracles.
- Willa Cather
Silence is a source of great strength.
- Lao Tzu
No crime is so great as daring to excel.
- Winston Churchill
Great minds discuss ideas;
average minds discuss events;
small minds discuss people.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
I have a great deal of company in the house,
especially in the morning when nobody calls.
- Henry David Thoreau
Regrets and resentments cause great suffering but fix nothing.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It gives me great pleasure indeed to see the stubbornness
of an incorrigible nonconformist warmly acclaimed.
- Albert Einstein
Mostly, it is human to dislike surprises -
often with great intensity.
Be open to new ways;
sometimes newness just knocks on our door;
welcome it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
To be one, to be united is a great thing.
But to respect the right to be different is maybe even greater.
- Bono
Don't be afraid to give up the good to go for the great.
- John D. Rockefeller
Life is a great big canvas,
and you should throw all the paint you can on it.
- Danny Kaye
Life in abundance comes only through great love.
- Elbert Hubbard
I long to accomplish a great and noble task,
but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks
as if they were great and noble.
- Helen Keller
Dare to dream of your great success.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
The great end of life is not knowledge but action.
- Thomas Henry Huxley
In great contests, each party claims to act
in accordance with the will of God.
Both may be, and one must be wrong.
- Abraham Lincoln
If a man is called to be a street sweeper,
he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted,
or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry.
He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts
of heaven and earth will pause to say,
here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Having a personal opinion is great.
Believing that one's personal opinion is absolute truth
leads to most of the world's troubles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Dare to dream of your great success.
Become intimate with those things
which deeply motivate you
and regularly work toward
the realization of that mission.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Neither a man nor a crowd nor a nation
can be trusted to act humanely
or to think sanely under the influence of a great fear.
- Bertrand Russell
You're off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting,
So... get on your way!
- Dr. Seuss
I am a great believer in luck
and I find that the harder
I work the more I have of it.
- Thomas Jefferson
Half a truth is often a great lie.
- Benjamin Franklin
Man becomes great exactly in the degree
in which he works for the welfare of his fellow-men.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
It seems that we have it backward in our society.
We tend to look up to people
who are under a great deal of stress,
who can handle loads of stress,
and those who are under a great deal of pressure.
- Richard Carlson
It is an act of great Courage to forsake all Blame.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
My father always used to say that when you die,
if you've got five real friends, then you've had a great life.
- Lee Iacocca
Great hearts steadily send forth the secret forces
that incessantly draw great events.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
It takes a great deal of courage to stand up to your enemies,
but even more to stand up to your friends.
- J.K. Rowling
Small opportunities are often
the beginning of great enterprises.
- Demosthenes
Because of a great love, one is courageous.
- Lao Tzu
Just as a man would not cherish living
in a body other than his own,
so do nations not like to live under other nations,
however noble and great the latter may be.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Don't let a little dispute injure a great relationship.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama
People with great gifts are easy to find,
but symmetrical and balanced ones never.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Confidence is the most important single factor in this game,
and no matter how great your natural talent,
there is only one way to obtain and sustain it: work.
- Jack Nicklaus
How do we measure a great leader?
By how he treats the least of these.
- Jesse Jackson
A great part of courage is the courage
of having done the thing before.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
These are not dark days: these are great days -
the greatest days our country has ever lived.
- Winston Churchill
Love is the great miracle cure.
Loving ourselves works miracles in our lives.
- Louise L. Hay
You will become as small as your controlling desire;
as great as your dominant aspiration.
- James Allen
I welcome change as a great adventure.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
We come nearest to the great
when we are great in humility.
- Rabindranath Tagore
Great people are those who make others feel
that they, too, can become great.
- Mark Twain
The great pleasure in life is doing
what people say you cannot do.
- Walter Bagehot
Until you'll willing to look foolish,
you'll never have the possibility of being great.
- Cher
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.