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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Message Quotes
Funny Quotes about Message

Let these funny Message Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Every child comes with the message
that God is not yet discouraged of man.
- Rabindranath Tagore

If you want a love message to be heard,
it has got to be sent out.
To keep a lamp burning,
we have to keep putting oil in it.
- Mother Teresa

If we want a love message to be heard,
it has got to be sent out.
To keep a lamp burning,
we have to keep putting oil in it.
- Mother Teresa

My life is my message.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi


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All major religious traditions
carry basically the same message,
that is love, compassion and forgiveness.
The important thing is they should
be part of our daily lives.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama

If the sight of the blue skies fills you with joy,
if a blade of grass springing up in the fields has power to move you,
if the simple things in nature have a message you understand,
Rejoice, for your soul is alive.
- Eleanora Duse

I think one of the finest gifts I can give
my friends in the holiday season is to pause
with a long enough quality to actually SEE them.
My calm, unhurried presence communicates
this gift of a message, "I see you. I recognize you.
I remember our times of together
and am contributing right now to another quality memory.
I value you and honor and take the time,
right this moment to pause long enough to truly notice you."
- Mary Anne Radmacher


 

It's not a mess.
It's a physical manifestation of
a wonderfully complex ability to
assess and compartmentalize information.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

The world is perfect. It's a mess.
It has always been a mess.
We are not going to change it.
Our job is to straighten out our own lives.
- Joseph Campbell

This life is what you make it.
Not matter what, you're going to mess up sometimes,
it's a universal truth.
But the good part is,
you get to decide how you're going to mess it up.
Girls will be your friends - they'll act like it anyway.
But just remember, some come, some go.
The ones that stay with you through everything -
they're your true best friends.
Don't let go of them.
Also remember, sisters make the best friends in the world.
- Marilyn Monroe

Lighten up! Slow down the shopping.
Your greatest gift to your family and friends is yourself -
your relaxed, happy, and fully-present self.
Consider gifting hand-made cards with messages
of true appreciation in place of store-bought presents.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I decided that it was not wisdom that
enabled poets to write their poetry,
but a kind of instinct or inspiration,
such as you find in seers and prophets
who deliver all their sublime messages
without knowing in the least what they mean.
- Socrates

We may not always be aware of it, but we all create
and repeat affirmations constantly.
The problem is, we typically don't pay attention
to exactly what those affirmations are saying.
Often we go through the day giving ourselves
all sorts of contradictory, or even negative messages.
We may project confidence to the world around us,
while our inner dialogue says...
I hope this works.
I am so nervous about this.
I hope I don't blow it.
Affirmations are self fulfilling prophecies.
If we say, This is never going to work
... then chances are excellent it never will.
- John Assaraf

Lighten up, have a rainbows and butterflies kind of day.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The trick is growing up without growing old.
- Casey Stengel

A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle.
- Benjamin Franklin

Love is like an hourglass,
with the heart filling up as the brain empties.
- Jules Renard

Life's like Vegas. You're up, you're down,
but in the end the house always wins.
Doesn't mean you didn't have fun.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of ...
about me not listening to her, or something.
I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
- the movie Dumb & Dumber (1994)

My boyfriend and I broke up.
He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.
- Rita Rudner

Oh, come on, Shrek, wake up and smell the pheromones!
- the movie Shrek (2001)

To keep your marriage brimming,
With love in the wedding cup,
Whenever you're wrong, admit it;
Whenever you're right, shut up.
- Ogden Nash

After fifteen minutes I wanted to marry her,
and after half an hour
I completely gave up the idea of stealing her purse.
- the movie Take the Money and Run (1969)

You'll live to be a hundred if you give up
all the things that make you want to.
- the movie Interiors

I have faith. I just need proof to back it up.
- the movie Simon Birch

If you don't know where you are going,
you might wind up someplace else.
- Yogi Berra

One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain

New Yorkers love it when you spill your guts out there.
Spill your guts at Wimbledon and they make you stop and clean it up.
- Jimmy Carter

They have come up with a perfect understanding.
He won't try to run her life,
and he won't try to run his, either.
- Anonymous

Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak;
courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.
- Winston Churchill

It looks like we're up chocolate creek without a Popsicle stick!
- the movie Shrek 2 (2004)

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
- Phyllis Diller

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world.
I know because I've done it thousands of times.
- Mark Twain

Heaven must be an awfully dull place
if your best friends end up elsewhere.
- Anonymous

The end move in politics is always to pick up a gun.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

I was wise enough to never grow up
while fooling most people into believing I had.
- Margaret Mead

I was so jazzed about sobering up
and starting a new life;
I had to stop at a bar
to get a drink just to calm down.
- the television series Glee

Man will occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.
- Winston Churchill

Praying is important when you wake up
at two o'clock in the morning
feeling sick from eating something dumb the day before.
- Charlie Brown in Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts

People who are wrapped up in themselves make small packages.
- Benjamin Franklin

Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask "Why me?"
Then a voice answers "Nothing personal,
your name just happened to come up. -
- Charlie Brown, in Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts

If it keeps up, man will atrophy
all his limbs but the push-button finger.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

Mothers all want their sons to grow up to be president,
but they don't want them to become politicians in the process.
- John F. Kennedy

If at first you don't succeed,
try, try, and try again.
Then give up.
There's no use being a damned fool about it.
- W. C. Fields

Few things are harder to put up with
than the annoyance of a good example.
- Mark Twain

Never stir up litigation.
A worse man can scarcely be found than one who does this.
- Abraham Lincoln

I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner

Oh, you weak, beautiful people
who give up with such grace.
What you need is someone to take hold of you -
gently, with love, and hand your life back to you.
- Tennessee Williams

Creationists make it sound as though a "theory'
is something you dreamt up after being drunk all night.
- Isaac Asimov

Ending a sentence with a preposition is
something up with which I will not put.
- Winston Churchill

This being grown up isn't all it's cracked up to be.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is like a roller coaster - scream Whee... on the way down,
and let the momentum carry you back up the next hill.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I know that God made the whole world in 4004 BC.
I know because my preacher told me. He's a good man.
He's even saving up all the money we give him
to go to bible college someday.
- Anonymous Humor

I am fond of pigs.
Dogs look up to us.
Cats look down on us.
Pigs treat us as equals.
- Winston Churchill

There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie

I once had a rose named after me
and I was very flattered.
But I was not pleased to read
the description in the catalogue:
no good in a bed, but fine up against a wall.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

I don't advise a haircut, man.
All hairdressers are in the employment of the government.
Hairs are your aerials.
They pick up signals from the cosmos,
and transmit them directly into the brain.
This is the reason bald-headed men are uptight.
- the movie Withnail & I

As the evening beckons with the promise of tomorrow...
may your gratitude rise up and with strength answer, "yes."
- Mary Anne Radmacher

I always seem to get inspiration and renewed vitality
by contact with this great novel land of yours
which sticks up out of the Atlantic.
- Winston Churchill

Twinkle, twinkle little bat
How I wonder what you're at!
Up above the world you fly,
Like a tea-tray in the sky.
- Lewis Carroll

I always arrive late at the office,
but I make up for it by leaving early.
- Charles Lamb

The God of Children and Fools:
There once was a man way up high,
who sat on his chair in the sky.
he called down to fool us,
and said he would rule us,
until we woke up bye and bye.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Sometimes I wonder if we shall ever grow up
in our politics and say definite things which mean something,
or whether we shall always go on using generalities
to which everyone can subscribe, and which mean very little.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

The way I see it, if you want the rainbow,
you gotta put up with the rain.
- Dolly Parton

You have enemies? Good.
That means you've stood up for something,
sometime in your life.
- Winston Churchill

Far away there in the sunshine are my highest aspirations.
I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty,
believe in them, and try to follow where they lead.
- Louisa May Alcott

If it's Right, stand up for it - together.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It is a truism that almost any sect, cult, or religion
will legislate its creed into law
if it acquires the political power to do so,
and will follow it by suppressing opposition,
subverting all education to seize early the minds of the young,
and by killing, locking up, or driving underground all heretics.
- Robert Heinlein

One of the annoying things about believing in free will
and individual responsibility is the difficulty
of finding somebody to blame your problems on.
And when you do find somebody, it's remarkable
how often his picture turns up on your driver's license.
- P. J. O'Rourke

It is the friends you can call up at 4 A.M. that matter.
- Marlene Dietrich

"Hurry up" ranks right up there with "you need to"
as a destroyer of our humanity.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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