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Funny Longevity Quotes
Funny Quotes about Longevity

Let these funny Longevity Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

The quality, not the longevity, of one's life is what is important.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Well, I don't know what will happen now.
We've got some difficult days ahead.
But it doesn't matter with me now.
Because I've been to the mountaintop.
And I don't mind. Like any man,
I would like to live a long life.
Longevity has its place.
But I'm not concerned about that now.
I just want to do God's will.
And He's allowed me to go up to the mountain.
And I've looked over.
And I've seen the promised land.
I may not get there with you.
But I want you to know tonight, that we,
as a people, will get to the promised land.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

The rarest quality in an epitaph is truth.
- Henry David Thoreau

The first quality that is needed is audacity.
- Winston Churchill


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Non-violence, which is the quality of the heart,
cannot come by an appeal to the brain.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

It is the quality of the moment,
not the number of days, or events, or of actors, that imports.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

The quality of a man's life is in direct proportion
to his commitment to excellence,
regardless of his chosen field of endeavor.
- Vince Lombardi


 

Instead of needing lots of children,
we need high-quality children.
- Margaret Mead

You will never do anything in this world without courage.
It is the greatest quality of the mind next to honor.
- James Allen

There is more difference in the quality
of our pleasures than in the amount.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Courage is rightly esteemed the first of human qualities...
because it is the quality which guarantees all others.
- Winston Churchill

Youth is a quality, not a matter of circumstances.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

Honor your past, and all the consequences of that past.
Receive insight into relieving the pain
caused by past experiences and current attitudes toward life.
Observe life as it currently appears,
and then train yourself to observe life
from other perspectives that support a higher quality of living.
Re-consider your priorities.
Chart your Course.
Set Sail with Courage.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

At all times and under all circumstances,
we have the power to transform the quality of our lives.
- Werner Erhard

Be a yardstick of quality.
Some people aren't used to an environment
where excellence is expected.
- Steve Jobs

The quality of mercy is not strained.
It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven
Upon the place beneath. It is twice blest:
It blesseth him that gives and him that takes.
- William Shakespeare

Honor bespeaks worth. Confidence begets trust.
Service brings satisfaction.
Cooperation proves the quality of leadership.
- James Cash Penney

Creativity is the quality that you bring
to the activity that you are doing.
It is an attitude, an inner approach -
how you look at things.
- Osho

If we take the generally accepted definition of bravery
as a quality which knows no fear, I have never seen a brave man.
All men are frightened. The more intelligent they are,
the more they are frightened.
- George S. Patton

A nation which has forgotten the quality of courage
which in the past has been brought to public life
is not as likely to insist upon or regard
that quality in its chosen leaders today -
and in fact we have forgotten.
- John F. Kennedy

It is the quality of our work which will please God
and not the quantity.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

The supreme quality for leadership is unquestionably integrity.
Without it, no real success is possible,
no matter whether it is on a section gang,
a football field, in an army, or in an office.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Walking is Zen, sitting is Zen.
Then what will be the quality?
Watchfully alert, joyously unmotivated,
centered, loving, flowing, one walks.
And the walking is sauntering.
Loving, alert, watchful, one sits, unmotivated -
not sitting for anything in particular,
just enjoying how beautiful
just sitting doing nothing is,
how relaxing, how restful.
- Osho

Just one quality of the Buddha has to be remembered.
He consists only of one quality: witnessing.
This small word witnessing contains the whole of spirituality.
Witness that you are not the body.
Witness that you are not the mind.
Witness that you are only a witness.
As the witnessing deepens,
you start becoming drunk with the divine.
That is what is called ecstasy.
- Osho

Zen says that if you drop knowledge -
and within knowledge everything is included;
your name, your identity, everything,
because this has been given to you by others -
if you drop all that has been given by others,
you will have a totally different quality to your being: innocence.
This will be a crucifixion of the persona, the personality,
and there will be a resurrection of your innocence.
You will become a child again, reborn.
- Osho

I think one of the finest gifts I can give
my friends in the holiday season is to pause
with a long enough quality to actually SEE them.
My calm, unhurried presence communicates
this gift of a message, "I see you. I recognize you.
I remember our times of together
and am contributing right now to another quality memory.
I value you and honor and take the time,
right this moment to pause long enough to truly notice you."
- Mary Anne Radmacher

To affect the quality of the day,
that is the highest of arts.
- Henry David Thoreau

Respect the masterpiece. It is true reverence to man.
There is no quality so great, none so much needed now.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

It is a truth universally acknowledged that
when one part of your life starts going okay,
another falls spectacularly to pieces.
- the movie Bridget Jones Diary

Truth is a tendency.
- R. Buckminster Fuller

By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
- George Carlin

Always speak the truth,
think before you speak,
and write it down afterwards.
- Lewis Carroll

The lawyer's truth is not Truth,
but consistency or a consistent expediency.
- Henry David Thoreau

My way of joking is telling the truth;
that is the funniest joke in the world.
- George Bernard Shaw

A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.
- Will Rogers

Truth is beautiful, without doubt; but so are lies.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Truth is stranger than fiction,
but that is because Fiction is obliged
to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.
- Mark Twain

All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

Strike an average between what a woman thinks of her husband
a month before she marries him
and what she thinks of him a year afterward,
and you will have the truth about him.
- H. L. Mencken

If you are out to describe the truth,
leave elegance to the tailor.
- Albert Einstein

The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.
- Oscar Wilde

Man will occasionally stumble over the truth,
but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.
- Winston Churchill

Bad taste is simply saying the truth before it should be said.
- Mel Brooks

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
- Mark Twain

If you're going to tell people the truth,
be funny or they'll kill you.
- Billy Wilder

Tell the truth, or someone will tell it for you.
- Stephanie Klein

The words of truth are always paradoxical.
- Lao Tzu

The water in a vessel is sparkling;
the water in the sea is dark.
The small truth has words which are clear;
the great truth has great silence.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Use the power of your word
in the direction of truth and love.
- don Miguel Ruiz

Man is least himself when he talks in his own person.
Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
- Oscar Wilde

When a thing is funny, search it for a hidden truth.
- George Bernard Shaw

The truth. It is a beautiful and terrible thing,
and should be treated with caution.
- J. K. Rowling

Soon we'll be out amid the cold world's strife.
Soon we'll be sliding down the razor blade of life.
But as we go our sordid sep'rate ways,
We shall ne'er forget thee, thou golden college days.
Hearts full of youth,
Hearts full of truth,
Six parts gin to one part vermouth.
- Tom Lehrer - song: Bright College Days,
album: An Evening Wasted With Tom Lehrer

I am sorry to think that you do not get a man's
most effective criticism until you provoke him.
Severe truth is expressed with some bitterness.
- Henry David Thoreau

The goal of education is the advancement of knowledge
and the dissemination of truth.
- John F. Kennedy

We take refuge in pride,
because we are afraid to tell the truth to ourselves.
- Kakuzo Okakura

Our actions are constrained by fear of reprisal,
but our dreams reveal our true character.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Every mind must make its choice
between truth and repose.
It cannot have both.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

A man must be both stupid and uncharitable
who believes there is no virtue or truth but on his own side.
- Joseph Addison

When you are sorrowful, look again in your heart,
and you shall see that in truth
you are weeping for that which has been your delight.
- Khalil Gibran

Intense feeling too often obscures the truth.
- Harry S. Truman

Truth is absolute, but only to one person.
My truth is absolute to me, and your truth is absolute to you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

We are not afraid to follow truth
wherever it may lead,
nor to tolerate any error
so long as reason is left free to combat it.
- Thomas Jefferson

Having a personal opinion is great.
Believing that one's personal opinion is absolute truth
leads to most of the world's troubles.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement.
But the opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth.
- Niels Bohr

My religion is based on truth and non-violence.
Truth is my God. Non-violence is the means of realizing Him.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Love is like the truth,
sometimes it prevails,
sometimes it hurts.
- Victor M. Garcia Jr.

Even if you are a minority of one,
the truth is the truth.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

Love is the only reality and it is not a mere sentiment.
It is the ultimate truth that lies at the heart of creation.
- Rabindranath Tagore

Love is the ultimate meaning of everything around us.
Love is not a mere sentiment.
Love is the ultimate truth at the heart of creation.
- Rabindranath Tagore


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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