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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Ingrain Quotes
Funny Quotes about Ingrain

Let these funny Ingrain Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

During his training, a baseball player strives
to make each swing better than the last.
The repetition of a faulty swing would be worse than useless.
It would ingrain bad habits.
The same is true of emotional responses.
If we allow ourselves to continue to have the same angry responses,
we just entrench our anger habit.
But if we strive - through consciousness, visualization, and coaching -
to moderate our anger response,
over time, we can train ourselves to respond
to events as we choose - without anger.
You can't magically be free from anger tomorrow,
but you can put yourself on your own training program
that will reduce the frequency and intensity
of your anger response day by day, year by year.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

My rule of life prescribed as an absolutely sacred rite
smoking cigars and also the drinking of alcohol
before, after and if need be during all meals
and in the intervals between them.
- Winston Churchill

During the first period of a man's life
the greatest danger is not to take the risk.
- Soren Kierkegaard

A person isn't who they are during
the last conversation you had with them -
they're who they've been
throughout your whole relationship.
- Rainer Maria Rilke


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Everyone has a "best friend" during each stage of life,
but only a precious few have the same one.
- Anonymous

During life, none of us is 100% open to Spirit -
we have too much ego to do that.
Only at death do we give up our ego and completely open to Spirit.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The soul loves to meditate,
for in contact with the Spirit lies its greatest joy.
If, then you experience mental resistance during meditation,
remember that reluctance to meditate comes from the ego;
it doesn't belong to the soul.
- Paramahansa Yogananda


 

Nuts.
- General Anthony Clement McAuliffe
responding to a German demand to surrender his
101st Airborne Division in Belgium during World War II.

The urge to save humanity is almost always
a false front for the urge to rule.
- H. L. Mencken

In individuals, insanity is rare;
but in groups, parties, nations and epochs,
it is the rule.
- Friedrich Nietzsche

A particularly beautiful woman is a source of terror.
As a rule, a beautiful woman is a terrible disappointment.
- Carl Jung

True friendship's laws are by this rule express'd,
Welcome the coming, speed the parting guest.
- Alexander Pope

In every society some men are born to rule,
and some to advise.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Majority rule only works if you're also
considering individual rights,
because you can't have five wolves and one sheep
voting on what to have for dinner.
- Larry Flynt

The God of Children and Fools:
There once was a man way up high,
who sat on his chair in the sky.
he called down to fool us,
and said he would rule us,
until we woke up bye and bye.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Who made the rule that life has to be so serious?
One would think that "life is serious" had been engraved
upon stone tablets to judge from how most lives are lived.
Get a life, smile broadly, sing loudly,
paint your rooms in bold colors,
search every rabbit hole for a magical white bunny,
have caviar for breakfast and oatmeal for dinner,
wear a purple coat with a red hat - dance lightly with life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The high destiny of the individual is to serve rather than to rule.
- Albert Einstein

Life is like music; it must be composed by ear,
feeling, and instinct, not by rule.
- Samuel Butler

There is no rule more invariable than that
we are paid for our suspicions
by finding what we suspect.
- Henry David Thoreau

"Be like me" is not a Golden Rule.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Any fool can make a rule, and any fool will mind it.
- Henry David Thoreau

The clearest way to show what the rule of law
means to us in everyday life
is to recall what has happened when there is no rule of law.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Hatred does not cease by hatred,
but only by love;
this is the eternal rule.
- The Buddha

Most of the fundamental ideas of science
are essentially simple,
and may, as a rule, be expressed
in a language comprehensible to everyone.
- Albert Einstein

Make it a rule of life never to regret
and never to look back.
- Katherine Mansfield

The golden rule is that there are no golden rules.
- George Bernard Shaw

The only sovereign you can allow to rule you is reason.
- Terry Goodkind

The tyrant dies and his rule is over,
the martyr dies and his rule begins
- Soren Kierkegaard

When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to
criticize or attack the government of my own country.
I make up for lost time when I come home.
- Winston Churchill

Among the many misdeeds of the British rule in India,
history will look upon the act of
depriving a whole nation of arms as the blackest.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

We can let circumstances rule us,
or we can take charge and
rule our lives from within.
- Earl Nightingale

A democracy is nothing more than mob rule,
where fifty-one percent of the people
may take away the rights of the other forty-nine.
- attributed to Thomas Jefferson

The older I get, the more wisdom I find
in the ancient rule of taking first things first.
A process which often reduces
the most complex human problem to a manageable proportion.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Know that the true essence of the Golden Rule
is always being compassionate, kind,
generous, and being in service to others.
Compelling others to behave as you wish
them to behave in the name of the
Golden Rule is a corruption of a sacred principle.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Happiness lies in accepting everyone
in our lives EXACTLY as they are.
We cause ourselves untold misery whenever
we believe others to be imperfect and try to change them.
This is the number one rule for a happy relationship.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I want to share with you the three rules
that I have in order to accept an apprentice.
Rule Number 1: Don't believe me.
I don't want you to believe me
but I want you to listen and make choices - your choices.
If what I say, doesn't work for you, leave it.
But if it works for you and that's what you want, then make it yours.
Rule Number 2: Don't believe yourself.
Why? Because most of your belief system is a lie - it's not true.
And by believing yourself, you create all the limitations
that don't allow you to be what you really are.
Don't believe yourself. Listen to what you say,
listen to what you think, listen to what you believe.
And when you listen, open your ears, open your mind,
open your intelligence and make choices.
Rule 3 is, don't believe anybody else.
Don't believe them at all.
Open your ears and your mind; listen and make choices.
- don Miguel Ruiz

Do to others as you would have them do to you.
- Luke 6:31 (the "Golden Rule")

People disparage knowing and the intellectual life,
and urge doing.
I am content with knowing, if only I could know.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

True art is characterized by an irresistible
urge in the creative artist.
- Albert Einstein

Morality is simply the attitude we adopt
towards people whom we personally dislike.
- Oscar Wilde

Religion is the masterpiece of the art of animal training,
for it trains people as to how they should think.
- Arthur Schopenhauer

Life is like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute -
only the last couple seconds are fatal,
but most people are scared to death the whole way down.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein

In critical moments men sometimes see
exactly what they wish to see.
- the character Spock of the television series Star Trek

We make our friends; we make our enemies;
but God makes our next-door neighbor.
- Gilbert (G. K.) Chesterton

Will the people in the cheaper seats clap your hands?
And the rest of you, if you'll just rattle your jewelry.
- John Lennon

When two people decide to get a divorce,
it isn't a sign that they "don't understand" one another,
but a sign that they have, at last, begun to.
- Helen Rowland

I think you're the opposite of a paranoid.
I think you go around with the insane delusion that people like you.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

I wanted to see exotic Vietnam, the jewel of Southeast Asia.
I, uh, I wanted to meet interesting
and stimulating people of an ancient culture,
and kill them.
- the movie Full Metal Jacket

Half the people you know are below average.
- Anonymous

Half the world is composed of idiots,
the other half, of people clever enough
to take indecent advantage of them.
- Walter Kerr

The Lord prefers common-looking people.
That is why he makes so many of them.
- Abraham Lincoln

Some cause happiness wherever they go;
others whenever they go.
- Oscar Wilde

One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin

The more you explain it, the more I don't understand it.
- Mark Twain

Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
- Mark Twain

Too bad all the people who know how to run this country
are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair.
- George Burns

The whole problem with the world is that
fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves,
but wiser people so full of doubts.
- Bertrand Russell

The trouble with having an open mind, of course,
is that people will insist on coming along
and trying to put things in it.
- Terry Pratchett

A common denominator of all religions is that
they have the power to bring out the best and the worst in people.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie

Be smarter than other people, just don't tell them so.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
- George Carlin

Some people are so heavenly minded
that they are no earthly good.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

I love mankind, it's people I can't stand.
- Charles M. Schulz

He who loves 50 people has 50 woes;
he who loves no one has no woes.
- The Buddha

Too many people spend money they haven't earned,
to buy things they don't want,
to impress people they don't like.
- Will Rogers

Most people enjoy the inferiority of their best friends.
- Lord Chesterfield

Interesting.
You Earth people glorify organized violence for 40 centuries,
but you imprison those who employ it privately.
- the character Spock in the television series Star Trek

Do something wonderful, people may imitate it.
- Albert Schweitzer

Unless they share our opinions,
we seldom find people sensible.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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