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Let these funny Inability Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
I have lost friends, some by death ...
others by sheer inability to cross the street.
- Virginia Woolf
Until you've lost your reputation,
you never realize what a burden it was.
- Margaret Mitchell
People say conversation is a lost art;
how often I have wished it were.
- Edward R. Murrow
If you can not answer a man's argument,
all is not lost; you can still call him vile names.
- Elbert Hubbard
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The civilized man has built a coach,
but has lost the use of his feet.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
True friendship is like sound health;
the value of it is seldom known until it be lost.
- Charles Caleb Colton
Though lovers be lost love shall not.
- Dylan Thomas
People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness.
Just because they're not on your road
doesn't mean they've gotten lost.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
Not until we are lost
do we begin to understand ourselves.
- Henry David Thoreau
There is a time to cry for those we have lost,
and there is a time to wipe the tears and smile again.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I have lost my seven best friends,
which is to say that God has had mercy on me
seven times without realizing it.
He lent a friendship, took it from me, and sent me another.
- Jean Cocteau
It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.
- Alfred Lord Tennyson
A child miseducated is a child lost.
- John F. Kennedy
The way to love anything is to realize that it may be lost.
- Gilbert (G. K.) Chesterton
For want of a nail the shoe was lost;
for want of a shoe the horse was lost;
and for want of a horse the rider was lost.
- Benjamin Franklin
The final delusion is the belief
that one has lost all delusions.
- Maurice Chapelain
As long as any adult thinks that he,
like the parents and teachers of old,
can become introspective,
invoking his own youth to understand
the youth before him,
he is lost.
- Margaret Mead
When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to
criticize or attack the government of my own country.
I make up for lost time when I come home.
- Winston Churchill
Man has lost the capacity to foresee and to forestall.
He will end by destroying the earth.
- Albert Schweitzer
Being part of the natural world reminds me
that innocence isn't ever lost completely;
we just need to maintain our goodness to regain it.
- Jewel
Knowledge is soon changed, then lost in the mist, an echo half-heard.
- Gene Wolfe
If you have built castles in the air,
your work need not be lost;
that is where they should be.
Now put foundations under them.
- Henry David Thoreau
Love is never lost. If not reciprocated,
it will flow back and soften and purify the heart.
- Washington Irving
If we open a quarrel between past and present,
we shall find that we have lost the future.
- Winston Churchill
He who hesitates is lost.
- Proverb
Life cannot be lived fully or joyfully if
our thoughts are focused on regretting the past,
preoccupied with anticipating the future,
or lost in the mind-fog of unconscious habitual behavior.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Are you feeling stressed and upset?
If so, you are worrying about tomorrow.
Events that have already occurred may cause you regret,
but they only appear to cause worry.
If you just lost your job, you are not worrying about losing your job -
that already happened.
You are worrying about paying your bills and finding a new job.
Those are worries about tomorrow.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Grief, a type of sadness that most often occurs
when you have lost someone you love, is a sneaky thing,
because it can disappear for a long time,
and then pop back up when you least expect it.
- Lemony Snicket
The more we know about how we lost
our spontaneous wonder and creativity,
the more we can find ways to get them back.
- John Bradshaw
The sum of wisdom is that
time is never lost that is devoted to work.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Innocence isn't ever lost completely;
we just need to maintain our goodness to regain it.
- Jewel
Never in any case say I have lost such a thing, but I have returned it.
Is your child dead? It is a return. Is your wife dead? It is a return.
Are you deprived of your estate? Is not this also a return?
- Epictetus
You can learn how to let go of the past.
Whether you have experienced a break up
with someone you cared for deeply,
whether death has taken a loved one,
whether you have had a feud with a friend or family member,
whether you have lost a job.
Move on and let go.
Life can be joyful and rewarding again.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Nothing is more valuable than your self respect.
When you lose respect for yourself, you have lost everything.
Whatever it takes, and whoever you upset,
do what you know - deep inside - is the right thing.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I desire so to conduct the affairs
of this administration that, if at the end...
I have lost every other friend on earth,
I shall at least have one friend left,
and that friend shall be down inside of me.
- Abraham Lincoln
When virtue is lost, benevolence appears,
when benevolence is lost right conduct appears,
when right conduct is lost, expedience appears.
Expediency is the mere shadow of right and truth;
it is the beginning of disorder.
- Lao Tzu
It is much more painful to have lost
something you thought you had,
than never to have had it at all.
If feels as if our trust was dashed.
We are disappointed and we are angry;
but not quite sure at who to direct our anger.
Someone, perhaps "the system," perhaps God,
should have done better.
Most of all we are angry at ourselves -
even though we did our best -
and we are afraid.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
What usually happens in the educational process is
that the faculties are dulled, overloaded, stuffed
and paralyzed so that by the time most people are mature
they have lost their innate capabilities.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
While it is natural to feel some degree of
need for the approval of others, be careful.
If you find yourself unwilling to
take actions that others disapprove of,
you have lost control of your own life
and have given your destiny to others.
An excessive need-for-approval
is a sign of low self-esteem,
and in severe cases, a condition termed co-dependency.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.
I love thee to the level of every day's
Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight.
I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;
I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.
I love with a passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints, - I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! - and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.
- Elizabeth Barrett Browning
Our moments of inspiration are not lost
though we have no particular poem to show for them;
for those experiences have left an indelible impression,
and we are ever and anon reminded of them.
- Henry David Thoreau
A man is incomplete until he is married.
After that, he is finished.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous
Procrastination is the bad habit of putting off
until the day after tomorrow what should
have been done the day before yesterday.
- Napoleon Hill
You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth
until the hour of separation.
- Khalil Gibran
Why wait until you're dead,
when you can create your own Hell right here and now.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Whenever I feel the need to exercise,
I lie down until it goes away.
- Robert Maynard Hutchins
Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie"
until you can find a rock.
- Will Rogers
One's first love is always perfect
until one meets one's second love.
- Elizabeth Aston
Procrastination is like a credit card:
it's a lot of fun until you get the bill.
- Christopher Parker
Customs do not concern themselves
with right or wrong or reason.
But they have to be obeyed;
one reasons all around them until he is tired,
but he must not transgress them, it is sternly forbidden.
- Mark Twain
The God of Children and Fools:
There once was a man way up high,
who sat on his chair in the sky.
he called down to fool us,
and said he would rule us,
until we woke up bye and bye.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The chains of habit are too weak to be felt
until they are too strong to be broken.
- Samuel Johnson
We'll be friends until forever, just you wait and see.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Make sure you never, never argue at night.
You just lose a good night's sleep,
and you can't settle anything until morning anyway.
- Rose Kennedy
Until you make the unconscious conscious,
it will direct your life and you will call it fate.
- Carl Jung
If a man is proud of his wealth,
he should not be praised until it is known how he employs it.
- Socrates
The power of intuitive understanding
will protect you from harm until the end of your days.
- Lao Tzu
We cannot change anything until we accept it.
Condemnation does not liberate, it oppresses.
- Carl Jung
We cannot change anything until we accept it.
- Carl Jung
Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man
... living in the sky. Who watches everything you do
every minute of every day. And the invisible man
has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do.
And if you do any of these things,
he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire
and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever,
and suffer, and suffer, and burn, and scream,
until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you.
He loves you and he needs money.
- George Carlin
When you feel worried and depressed,
consciously form a smile on your face and act upbeat
until the happy feeling becomes genuine.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
People don't care how much you know
until they know how much they care.
- John C. Maxwell
I am sorry to think that you do not get a man's
most effective criticism until you provoke him.
Severe truth is expressed with some bitterness.
- Henry David Thoreau
Some things cannot be spoken or discovered until
we have been stuck, incapacitated,
or blown off course for awhile.
- David Whyte
A person with a new idea is
a crank until the idea succeeds.
- Mark Twain
I believe that anyone can conquer fear
by doing the things he fears to do,
provided he keeps doing them until he gets
a record of successful experience behind him.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
A friend is someone who won't stop
until he finds you and brings you home.
- Fraser Sr. in the movie Due South
Women are like teabags.
We don't know our true strength
until we are in hot water!
- Eleanor Roosevelt
An individual has not started living
until he can rise above the narrow confines
of his individualistic concerns
to the broader concerns of all humanity.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.