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Funny Hurt Feelings Quotes
Funny Quotes about Hurt Feelings

Let these funny Hurt Feelings Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

You hurt because you're alive.
- the 2010 movie Charlie St. Cloud

All you need is love.
But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.
- Charles M. Schulz

Nobody can hurt me without my permission.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi PHOTO

We are injured and hurt emotionally,
not so much by other people
or what they say and don't say,
but by our own attitude and our own response.
- Maxwell Maltz


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Work like you don't need the money.
Love like you've never been hurt.
Dance like nobody's watching.
- Satchel Paige

Oh yes, the past can hurt.
But, you can either run from it or, learn from it.
- the movie The Lion King

Love like you've never been hurt,
dance like no one is watching,
live as though heaven is on earth.
- Satchel Paige


 

Sing like no one's listening,
love like you've never been hurt,
dance like nobody's watching,
and live like its heaven on earth.
- Mark Twain

The secret of success is to find a need and fill it,
to find a hurt and heal it,
to find somebody with a problem
and offer to help solve it.
- Robert H. Schuller

Only Americans can hurt America.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Dance like no one is watching,
love like you'll never be hurt.
Sing like no one is listening.
Live life like it's heaven on earth.
- Anonymous (various attributions and alternate phrasings)

Our prime purpose in this life is to help others.
And if you can't help them, at least don't hurt them.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama

I have found the paradox,
that if you love until it hurts,
there can be no more hurt, only more love.
- Mother Teresa

I unconditionally forgive everyone for all hurt
that I have ever experienced in the presence of their actions.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Let me say this as clearly as I can:
No matter how sharp a grievance or how deep a hurt,
there is no justification for killing innocents.
- William J. Clinton

Love the heart that hurts you,
but never hurt the heart that loves you.
- Vipin Sharma

Love comes to those who still hope
even though they've been disappointed,
to those who still believe
even though they've been betrayed,
to those who still love
even though they've been hurt before.
- Anonymous

I know how hard it is in these times to have faith.
But maybe if you could have the faith to start with,
maybe the times would change.
You could change them. Think about it. Try.
And try not to hurt each other.
- the movie Oh, God!

I unconditionally forgive everyone for all hurt
that I have ever experienced in the presence of their actions.
I unconditionally forgive myself for everything that I have ever done,
said, or thought that has caused me harm or suffering.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If you have an emotional reaction in the presence of someone,
your heart is telling you that you have
not resolved your issues with them.
In other words, you have not truly forgiven that person.
All of this begs the question, how do we forgive?
First, cease lying to yourself and stop telling yourself stories
about why you behave the way you do.
Stop blaming your behavior on other people
and take responsibility for your emotional reactions.
If you could forgive all the people in your life
who have hurt or wounded you
it would be possible to be in control of your behavior
instead of being in reaction to other people all of the time.
Imagine living life without experiencing
a constant emotional roller-coaster of pain, anger, and jealousy!
That would be bliss!
- Sheri Rosenthal

Forgiveness is the salve that heals
the wounds of unkind words and acts.
Forgive everyone for every hurt you have ever received -
for your own sake, that you may live in peace.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

What has happened at Guantanamo Bay...
does not represent the will of the American people.
I'm embarrassed about it, I think its wrong.
I think it does give terrorists an unwarranted excuse
to use the despicable means to hurt innocent people.
- Jimmy Carter

Life is magnificent - just as it comes.
Life has no need for fancy clothes, or lipstick.
Life is no pig.
Our life is the greatest gift of all creation.
When we are unhappy with life -
when we are shocked by the stock market,
or dismayed by our choice of political candidates,
let us not lash out in anger.
But also, let us not try to pretty up life
with some lipstick and some party clothes.
See life clearly - no rose colored glasses -
and then CHOOSE to love life.
CHOOSE to be happy, be joyful, be grateful,
be forgiving of everyone and of every act
we believe has hurt us.
Life just "IS."
We get to CHOOSE our relationship with life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

My coat and I live comfortably together.
It has assumed all my wrinkles, does not hurt me anywhere,
has moulded itself on my deformities,
and is complacent to all my movements,
and I only feel its presence because it keeps me warm.
Old coats and old friends are the same thing.
- Victor Hugo

Sticks and stones may break my bones,
but words will never hurt me.
- schoolyard rhyme

Most of us believe that we have
been betrayed by someone outside of us -
in other words someone has done something to hurt us,
been dishonest or broken a promise made:
some trust in some concept was broken.
Indeed someone may have taken an action
that took only their needs into consideration,
they may have not followed through on a promise made,
and they may have not told you the truth.
But their actions have nothing to do with you
and have everything to do with them.
That's why no one can do anything TO you.
They can take actions that involve you that you may not like -
according to your point of view.
But you are not a victim, no way, no how.
- Sheri Rosenthal

A woman is the only thing I am afraid of
that I know will not hurt me.
- Abraham Lincoln

I've become the person I've always hated, but I'm happier.
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity

When dealing with people, remember you are
not dealing with creatures of logic,
but creatures of emotion.
- Dale Carnegie

People will forget what you said,
people will forget what you did,
but people will never forget
how you made them feel.
- Maya Angelou

Intense feeling too often obscures the truth.
- Harry S. Truman

I'm half alive but I feel mostly dead.
- Jewel

We CHOOSE our actions, thoughts, and feelings.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It is only with the heart that one can see rightly;
what is essential is invisible to the eye.
- Antoine de Saint-Exupery

It is only with the heart that one can see rightly.
- Antoine de Saint-Exupery

If you talk to a man in a language he understands,
that goes to his head.
If you talk to him in his language,
that goes to his heart.
- Nelson Mandela

We tell lies when we are afraid...
afraid of what we don't know,
afraid of what others will think,
afraid of what will be found out about us.
But every time we tell a lie,
the thing that we fear grows stronger.
- Williams Tad

I'm having a bad day. I am not size six.
My legs are not skinny as sticks,
and dammit, someone's got to pay.
I'm afraid that I can't satisfy myself
and that my happiness depends on someone else.
I feel weak, so you're gonna take the fall.
You're so shallow.
- Jewel

I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure.
I make mistakes, I am out of control
and at times hard to handle.
But if you can't handle me at my worst,
then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.
- Marilyn Monroe

There are colors and feelings and emotional terrain
that we occupy that is ours and ours alone.
- Bono

Feelings are much stronger than thoughts.
We are all led by instinct,
and our intellect catches up later.
- Bono

Joy increases and suffering decreases
as one masters the distinction between events
and one's feelings about those events.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Music is what feelings sound like.
- Anonymous

We don't have a language for the senses.
Feelings are images,
sensations are like musical sounds.
- Anais Nin

I offer you peace.
I offer you love.
I offer you friendship.
I see your beauty.
I hear your need.
I feel your feelings.
My wisdom flows from the Highest Source.
I salute that Source in you.
Let us work together for unity and love.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

When one has the feeling of dislike for evil,
when one feels tranquil,
one finds pleasure in listening to good teachings;
when one has these feelings and appreciates them,
one is free of fear.
- The Buddha

If you have never experienced the practice
of daily journaling, give it a try. I highly recommend it.
When I say "journaling," I am not referring to a diary
in which to record the events of your life,
I am talking about a place to record your feelings -
a friend with whom to share your troubles, fears, hopes, and dreams.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

One looks back with appreciation to the brilliant teachers,
but with gratitude to those who touched our human feelings.
The curriculum is so much necessary raw material,
but warmth is the vital element for the growing plant
and for the soul of the child.
- Carl Jung

I Forgive Myself and All Others with Compassion -
I forgive everyone, especially myself,
for all actions and all inactions throughout my entire life.
I accept that no one else has ever been to blame
for either my joy or my suffering.
The entire cause of all my joys and all my sufferings
is my own emotional response to the events of my life,
and I am committed to consistently distinguishing
between my feelings about events
and the physical occurrence of those events.
I declare that everyone who has ever played any role
in any of the events of my life is entirely without fault.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I am an excitable person who only
understands life lyrically, musically,
in whom feelings are much stronger as reason.
- Anais Nin

U2 is an original species...
there are colors and feelings and emotional terrain
that we occupy that is ours and ours alone.
- Bono

I have gratitude for EVERYTHING that has ever occurred
to bring me to this moment.
I accept that no one else is ever to blame
for either my joy or my suffering.
The entire cause of all my joys and all my sufferings
is my own emotional response to the events of my life,
and I am committed to consistently distinguishing
between my feelings about events
and the physical occurrences of those events.
I declare that everyone who has ever played
any role in any of the events of my life
is entirely without fault.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

There's no reason to become alarmed,
and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight.
By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?
- the movie Airplane!

My advice to you is get married:
if you find a good wife you'll be happy;
if not, you'll become a philosopher.
- Socrates

The rite of the rings appeals yet appalls:
a cutting, a joining, a losing, a gaining.
One becomes half, as two become one.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I will far rather see the race of man extinct
than that we should become less than beasts
by making the noblest of God's creation,
woman, the object of our lust.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

The jump is so frightening
between where I am,
and where I want to be.
Because of all I may become,
I will close my eyes and leap.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

Men have become the tools of their tools.
- Henry David Thoreau

Mothers all want their sons to grow up to be president,
but they don't want them to become politicians in the process.
- John F. Kennedy

We must become the change we wish to see in the world.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

What we think, we become.
All that we are arises with our thoughts.
With our thoughts, we make the world.
- The Buddha

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent
about things that matter.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

When the vast cathedral of our being
becomes a sanctuary for all creation,
we become the face of God.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Appreciate again and again, freshly and naively,
the basic goods of life, with awe,
pleasure, wonder and even ecstasy,
however stale these experiences may have become to others.
- Abraham Maslow

It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.
- e. e. cummings

If I try to be like him, who will be like me?
- Yiddish proverb

By all means marry.
If you get a good wife, you'll be happy.
If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher
and that is a good thing for any man.
- Socrates

Lovers who have been left, lose confidence and become afraid.
They learn to leave relationships first.
The broken hearted become the heart breakers.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light,
but by making the darkness conscious.
- Carl Jung

If you can imagine it, you can achieve it.
If you can dream it, you can become it.
- William Arthur Ward

The most important outcome of education
is to help students become independent of formal education.
- Paul E. Gray


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.