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Let these funny Humor Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Life's burdens are lighter when I laugh at myself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I can resist everything except temptation.
- Oscar Wilde
Wit is the lowest form of humor.
- Alexander Pope
A joke is a very serious thing.
- Winston Churchill
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He early on let her know who is the boss.
He looked her right in the eye and clearly said, "You're the boss."
- Anonymous humor
Humor is reason gone mad.
- Groucho Marx
Confucius might have said:
Once frightened, twice smelly in armpit.
- Anonymous humor
I know that God made the whole world in 4004 BC.
I know because my preacher told me. He's a good man.
He's even saving up all the money we give him
to go to bible college someday.
- Anonymous Humor
When life gets you down -
just put on your big girl panties and deal with it.
- Anonymous humor
A well-developed sense of humor
is the pole that adds balance to your steps,
as you walk the tightrope of life.
- William Arthur Ward
One can never speak enough of the virtues,
the dangers, the power of shared laughter.
- Francoise Sagan
Hang tough... big girl panties today.
- Anonymous humor
Life is not a tragedy, it is a comedy.
To be alive means to have a sense of humor.
- Osho
If I had no sense of humor,
I would long ago have committed suicide.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
You grow up the day you have
your first real laugh - at yourself.
- Ethel Barrymore
A willingness to laugh at itself is what distinguishes
a compassionate religion from a cult.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life would be tragic if it weren't funny.
- Stephen Hawking
A person without a sense of humor
is like a wagon without springs.
It's jolted by every pebble on the road.
- Henry Ward Beecher
So long as you have courage and a sense of humor,
it is never too late to start life afresh.
- Freeman Dyson
Through humor, you can soften some
of the worst blows that life delivers.
And once you find laughter,
no matter how painful your situation might be,
you can survive it.
- Bill Cosby
Humor is mankind's greatest blessing.
- Mark Twain
A sense of humor... is needed armor.
Joy in one's heart and some laughter on one's lips
is a sign that the person down deep
has a pretty good grasp of life.
- Hugh Sidey
Good humor is the health of the soul,
sadness is its poison.
- Lord Chesterfield
Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing,
moving at different speeds.
A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing.
- William James
Seriousness is a sickness; your sense of humor
makes you more human, more humble.
The sense of humor - according to me -
is one of the most essential parts of religiousness.
- Osho
A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing.
- William James
Few people know how to take a walk.
The qualifications are endurance,
plain clothes, old shoes, an eye for nature,
good humor, vast curiosity, good speech,
good silence and nothing too much.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
In truth, politeness is artificial good humor,
it covers the natural want of it,
and ends by rendering habitual a substitute
nearly equivalent to the real virtue.
- Thomas Jefferson
Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes.
Don't resist them - that only creates sorrow.
Let reality be reality.
Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.
- Lao Tzu
What you resist, persists.
- Carl Jung
We gain the strength of the temptation we resist.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
It's easier to resist at the beginning than at the end.
- Leonardo da Vinci
When I am able to resist the temptation to judge others,
I can see them as teachers.
- Gerald Jampolsky
It is the nature of the wise to resist pleasures,
but the foolish to be a slave to them.
- Epictetus
I Resist the Temptation to Judge Others.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Nothing is softer or more flexible than water,
yet nothing can resist it.
- Lao Tzu
It behooves every man who values liberty of conscience for himself,
to resist invasions of it in the case of others:
or their case may, by change of circumstances, become his own.
- Thomas Jefferson
If we fail to plan, we merely bob helplessly -
like a cork on the sea of life.
If we resist whatever life delivers to us,
we create untold misery for ourselves.
If we act with vision and commitment,
and then accept whatever Spirit provides,
we live a life of purpose and joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
(Jesus on Anger and Revenge)
You have heard that it was said,
"Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth."
But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person.
If someone strikes you on the right cheek,
turn to him the other also.
- Matthew 5:38-39
Life ... full of loneliness, and misery,
and suffering, and unhappiness,
and it's all over much too quickly.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall
Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz
Life is like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute -
only the last couple seconds are fatal,
but most people are scared to death the whole way down.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The trick is growing up without growing old.
- Casey Stengel
I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
Morality is simply the attitude we adopt
towards people whom we personally dislike.
- Oscar Wilde
The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec
It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble.
It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
- Mark Twain (attributed)
Life's like Vegas. You're up, you're down,
but in the end the house always wins.
Doesn't mean you didn't have fun.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
Life is serious, get out your magic wand.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is a journey - enjoy the journey.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If life is a trial, who is the judge and jury?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
- Mark Twain
One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill
To the young child, all life is a great adventure -
when did we grow so dull and brittle.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born
at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.
- Mark Twain
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
- Oscar Wilde
The difference between school and life?
In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test.
In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson.
- Tom Bodett
In the book of life, the answers aren't in the back.
- Charles M. Schulz in his Peanuts cartoon
One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
- Ogden Nash
Old age is fifteen years older than I am.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is always lived in the eye-of-the-storm
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is defined more by its contrasts than its samenesses;
Life is defined more by its risks than the many securities.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
You can't make an omelet without breaking eggs.
- Anonymous
Life only
appears to be
rushing toward us
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
No matter how much cats fight,
there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
- Abraham Lincoln
The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous
Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.
- John Lennon
A big part of letting go is recognizing
when it is time to stay in a situation
and when it is time to move on.
- Darren L. Johnson
It is hard enough to remember my opinions,
without also remembering my reasons for them!
- Friedrich Nietzsche
If life is a bowl of cherries, then what am I doing in the pits?
- Erma Bombeck
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.