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Funny Groups Quotes
Funny Quotes about Groups

Let these funny Groups Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

I love and treasure individuals as I meet them;
I loathe and despise the groups
they identify with and belong to.
- George Carlin

In individuals, insanity is rare;
but in groups, parties, nations and epochs,
it is the rule.
- Friedrich Nietzsche

People sort themselves into groups
of happy people and unhappy people
through two different, but complementary mechanisms,
influence and affinity.
I influence those around me
with my emotional state, either happy or unhappy.
At the same time, I feel an affinity
for others who are like me in some way -
in this case by sharing my emotional outlook on life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The virtues, like the Muses, are always seen in groups.
A good principle was never found solitary in any breast.
- The Buddha


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I would never want to be a member of a group
whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
- George Carlin

There are two kinds of people,
those who do the work,
and those who take the credit.
Try to be in the first group;
there is less competition there.
- Indira Gandhi

Because we believe that our ethnic group,
our society, our political party, our God,
is better than your God, we kill each other.
- Neale Donald Walsch


 

Recovery begins with embracing our pain
and taking the risk to share it with others.
We do this by joining a group
and talking about our pain.
- John Bradshaw

Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful,
committed people can change the world.
Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.
- Margaret Mead

This [the Holocaust] must never happen again. ...
Be vigilant about your rights.
Care about the rights and human dignity of others.
When the rights of any group, no matter how small,
no matter how marginal, are violated,
your liberty, your freedom is put at risk.
Let there never be a day when we cast about in horror
and have to ask the question, "How did it ever come to this?"
- Thomas Childers, Ph.D., Professor of History,
University of Pennsylvania, in the closing remarks
of his six-hour Teaching Company audio lecture series

The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde

Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz

Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
- Edgar Bergen

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
- Phyllis Diller

We have a great life here in Alaska,
and we're never going back to America again!
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)

And you just gotta remember, Sparky -
no matter what they tell you - you can NEVER have too much sugar.
- the movie Michael (1996)

I read that you should never go out with someone
if you can think of three reasons why you shouldn't.
- the movie Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason (2004)

You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor

Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire

You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly,
but I bet you ain't never seen a DONKEY fly!
- the movie Shrek (2001)

Never call an accountant a credit to his profession;
a good accountant is a debit to his profession.
- Charles Lyell

I have never developed indigestion from eating my words.
- Winston Churchill

TEAMWORK...means never having to take all the blame yourself.
- Anonymous

Until you've lost your reputation,
you never realize what a burden it was.
- Margaret Mitchell

Never stir up litigation.
A worse man can scarcely be found than one who does this.
- Abraham Lincoln

One should never trust a woman who tells her real age.
If she tells that, she'll tell anything.
- Oscar Wilde

Never give a sword to a man who can't dance.
- Confucius

People who want to share their religious views with you
almost never want you to share yours with them.
- Dave Barry

It's never too late -
never too late to start over,
never too late to be happy.
- Jane Fonda

One should never know too precisely
whom one has married
- Friedrich Nietzsche

My father always told me that
all businessmen were sons of bitches,
but I never believed it till now.
- John F. Kennedy

I always pass on good advice.
It is the only thing to do with it.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde

Eating words has never given me indigestion.
- Winston Churchill

Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller

Things have never been more like the way they are today in history.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

You never can tell with bees.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

I never make stupid mistakes.
Only very, very clever ones.
- John Peel

Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves
for they shall never cease to be amused.
- Anonymous

Which form of proverb do you prefer
Better late than never, or Better never than late?
- Lewis Carroll

Do not take life too seriously.
You will never get out of it alive.
- Elbert Hubbard

The savage in man is never quite eradicated.
- Henry David Thoreau

Life is never fair, and perhaps it is a good thing
for most of us that it is not.
- Oscar Wilde

I have great hopes that we shall love each other all our lives
as much as if we had never married at all.
- Lord Byron

Never trust spiritual leader who doesn't dance.
- Miyagi: character in the movie The Next Karate Kid

Never put off till tomorrow
what you can do the day after tomorrow.
- Mark Twain

Conscience is a mother-in-law whose visit never ends.
- H. L. Mencken

I never accepted the idea
that I had to be guided by
some pattern or blueprint.
- Little Richard

One can never consent to creep when one feels the impulse to soar.
- Helen Keller

Never let the fear of striking out get in your way.
- Babe Ruth

Man's nature is not essentially evil.
Brute nature has been known to
yield to the influence of love.
You must never despair of human nature.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

I was wise enough to never grow up
while fooling most people into believing I had.
- Margaret Mead

You are Never Too Old to Give or Get Gold Stars.
Show Your Honest Appreciation - Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple.
- Oscar Wilde

I never considered a difference of opinion
in politics, in religion, in philosophy,
as cause for withdrawing from a friend.
- Thomas Jefferson

One should always be in love.
That is the reason one should never marry.
- Oscar Wilde

Stay Happy, never let anyone get your goat.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Never try to teach a pig to sing.
It wastes your time, and it annoys the pig.
- Mark Twain

Some things will never seem adequate
no matter how hard we try.
- from the movie White Man's Burden

A person who never made a mistake
never tried anything new.
- Albert Einstein

The way for a young man to rise is
to improve himself in every way he can,
never suspecting that anybody wishes to hinder him.
- Abraham Lincoln

You are never too old to set another goal
or to dream a new dream.
- C. S. Lewis

People will forget what you said,
people will forget what you did,
but people will never forget
how you made them feel.
- Maya Angelou

Mind Chatter...
"I'm too fat; I'm too thin; and my hair is a fright;
And I'm never enough; and my world is not right;
I'm not smart; I'm not cute; I'm not strong; I'm a bust
I earn scorn; I earn hate; I'm no good; I disgust."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

She drove me to drink.
That's the one thing I'm indebted to her for.
- the movie Never Give a Sucker an Even Break

Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates.
You never know what you're gonna get.
- the movie Forrest Gump

"Rabbit's clever," said Pooh thoughtfully.
"Yes," said Piglet, "Rabbit's clever."
"And he has Brain."
"Yes," said Piglet, "Rabbit has Brain."
There was a long silence.
"I suppose," said Pooh, "that that's why he never understands anything."
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

Our Joy comes from living our own lives simply -
never from demanding that others live simply -
or from ever making any demands whatsoever upon others.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Anyone who knows history, particularly
the history of Europe, will, I think,
recognize that the domination
of education or of government
by any one particular religious faith
is never a happy arrangement for the people.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Never interrupt someone doing what you said couldn't be done.
- Amelia Earhart

Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge:
it is those who know little, and not those who know much,
who so positively assert that this or that problem
will never be solved by science.
- Charles Darwin

There are only two or three human stories,
and they go on repeating themselves as fiercely
as if they had never happened before.
- Willa Cather


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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