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Let these funny Fiercely Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
There are only two or three human stories,
and they go on repeating themselves as fiercely
as if they had never happened before.
- Willa Cather
I do not believe in using women in combat,
because females are too fierce.
- Margaret Mead
Today is a day to cover your best weapons in velvet.
Go gently into the world.
Hold your anger.
Keep your competitive spirit in check.
Some day you will need your fierce weapons,
but not today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand
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If you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- the movie The Matrix (1999)
"It's not that important,
don't worry about it" is the answer,
now what was the question?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer
Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It's not the size of the dog in the fight,
it's the size of the fight in the dog.
- Mark Twain
When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
- Mark Twain
Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of ...
about me not listening to her, or something.
I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
- the movie Dumb & Dumber (1994)
If at first you don't succeed,
skydiving is not for you.
- Anonymous
It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel
I'm not used to feeling so human.
Is it always like this?
- Edward, from Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer
The most important words in the English language
are not "I love you" but "It's benign."
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry
Marriage is a fine institution -
but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
- Mae West
I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.
- Anonymous
One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill
No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous
Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire
Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein
Personally, I'm always ready to learn,
although I do not always like being taught.
- Winston Churchill
I care not much for a man's religion
whose dog and cat are not the better for it.
- Abraham Lincoln
Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove
The key is, to not think of death as an end,
but as more of a very effective way to cut down on your expenses.
- the movie Love and Death
DON'T get officious.
You're not yourself when you're officious -
That is the curse of a government job.
- the movie Harold and Maude (1971)
Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
- Albert Einstein
In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland
It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous
Yield to temptation. It may not pass your way again.
- Robert A. Heinlein
Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
- Will Rogers
I'm not talking about lust.
A woman in lust wants chocolate.
A woman in love wants diamonds.
- the movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West
Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
and I'm not sure about the universe.
- Albert Einstein
Damn it boss, I like you too much not to say it.
You've got everything except one thing: madness!
- the movie Zorba The Greek
Normal is not something to aspire to,
it's something to get away from.
- Jodie Foster
Do not take life too seriously.
You will never get out of it alive.
- Elbert Hubbard
I am not young enough to know everything.
- Oscar Wilde
Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth
until the hour of separation.
- Khalil Gibran
The man who does not read good books
has no advantage over the man who cannot read them.
- Mark Twain
Adventure is not outside man; it is within.
- George Eliot
Though I am a servant, I am not your servant.
- Ursula K. Le Guin
I want to be the white man's brother, not his brother-in-law.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Do not speak to me of rules.
This is war! This is not a game of cricket!
- from the movie The Bridge On The River Kwai
Politics is such a torment that I advise everyone
I love not to mix with it.
- Thomas Jefferson
The trouble with the world is not
that people know too little,
but that they know so many things that ain't so.
- Mark Twain
Silence is not always a Sign of Wisdom,
but Babbling is ever a folly.
- Benjamin Franklin
There is no use whatsoever trying to help
people who do not help themselves.
You cannot push anyone up a ladder
unless he is willing to climb himself.
- Andrew Carnegie
The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous
I think that there is nothing, not even crime,
more opposed to poetry, to philosophy, ay, to life itself
than this incessant business.
- Henry David Thoreau
I'm sure we all agree that we ought to love one another
and I know there are people in the world
that do not love their fellow human beings
and I HATE people like that.
- Tom Lehrer
Confused Memories of Childhood:
Hate to my father, cruel hate,
confused with love - a mix not great.
The man I love - the man I hate;
the man I want to emulate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is never fair, and perhaps it is a good thing
for most of us that it is not.
- Oscar Wilde
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our Light, not our Darkness, that most frightens us.
- Marianne Williamson
For those who do not think,
it is best at least to rearrange
their prejudices once in a while.
- Luther Burbank
The function of muscle is to pull and not to push,
except in the case of the genitals and the tongue.
- Leonardo da Vinci
Morality which depends upon the helplessness
of a man or woman has not much to recommend it.
Morality is rooted in the purity of our hearts.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
A loyal friend laughs at your jokes
when they're not so good,
and sympathizes with your problems
when they're not so bad.
- Arnold H. Glasgow
If you ask me anything I don't know,
I'm not going to answer.
- Yogi Berra
One does not discover new lands without consenting
to lose sight of the shore for a very long time.
- Andre Gide
Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition,
is not only a waste of energy
but the worst habit you could possibly have.
- Dale Carnegie
Ending a sentence with a preposition is
something up with which I will not put.
- Winston Churchill
The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet
and steady and loyal and enduring a nature
that it will last through a whole lifetime,
if not asked to lend money.
- Mark Twain
For centuries, theologians have been explaining
the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing.
- H. L. Mencken
I do not believe that civilization will be wiped out
in a war fought with the atomic bomb.
Perhaps two-thirds of the people of the earth will be killed.
- Albert Einstein
Delusion: belief said to be false by someone who does not share it.
- Thomas Szasz
Do not laugh much or often or unrestrainedly.
- Epictetus
It's not very heroic to slay dragons.
Dragons are generally very peaceful and well behaved.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A positive attitude may not solve all your problems,
but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.
- Herm Albright
The existence of an anthropomorphic
"Father-figure" deity is not impossible,
merely exceptionally improbable and illogical.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I am not afraid of storms
for I am learning how to sail my ship.
- Louisa May Alcott
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.