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Let these funny Depending Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Mr. President, I'm not saying we wouldn't get our hair mussed.
But I do say no more than ten to twenty million killed, tops.
Uh, depending on the breaks.
- the movie Dr. Strangelove
My courage does not depend on the weather.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Depth of friendship does not depend on length of acquaintance.
- Rabindranath Tagore
Nature is trying very hard to make us succeed,
but nature does not depend on us.
We are not the only experiment.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
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True friendship can afford true knowledge.
It does not depend on darkness and ignorance.
- Henry David Thoreau
Work out your own salvation.
Do not depend on others.
- The Buddha
A true friend is a rock upon whom you can depend.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Happiness doesn't depend on any external conditions,
it is governed by our mental attitude.
- Dale Carnegie
The whole secret of existence is to have no fear.
Never fear what will become of you, depend on no one.
Only the moment you reject all help are you freed.
- The Buddha
The essence of philosophy is that a man should so live
that his happiness shall depend
as little as possible on external things.
- Epictetus
You may be always victorious if
you will never enter into any contest
where the issue does not wholly depend upon yourself.
- Epictetus
Does who we are begin with breath,
depend on form, or end with death?
- Kirtana
Our greatest happiness does not depend on the condition of life
in which chance has placed us,
but is always the result of a good conscience,
good health, occupation, and freedom in all just pursuits.
- Thomas Jefferson
First meditate, be blissful,
then much love will happen of its own accord.
Then being with others is beautiful
and being alone is also beautiful.
Then it is simple, too.
You dont depend on others
and you dont make others dependent on you.
- Osho
Life is like a sewer...
what you get out of it depends on what you put into it.
- Tom Lehrer
In life you are given two ends;
one to think with and the other to sit on.
Your success in life depends on which end you use most.
Heads you win, tails you lose.
- Conrad Burns
Morality which depends upon the helplessness
of a man or woman has not much to recommend it.
Morality is rooted in the purity of our hearts.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Happiness depends upon ourselves.
- Aristotle
What we see depends mainly on what we look for.
- John Lubbock
Whatever you want in life, start today.
Not tomorrow - today.
Let it be a small beginning - a tiny beginning.
Your happiness depends on starting today - every day.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It all depends on how we look at things,
and not how they are in themselves.
- Carl Jung
The solution to adult problems tomorrow
depends in large measure upon
how our children grow up today.
- Margaret Mead
It all depends on how we look at things,
and not on how things are in themselves.
The least of things with a meaning
is worth more in life than the greatest of things without it.
- Carl Jung
All that is valuable in human society
depends upon the opportunity for development
accorded the individual.
- Albert Einstein
Remember, upon the conduct of each depends the fate of all.
- Alexander the Great
I'm having a bad day. I am not size six.
My legs are not skinny as sticks,
and dammit, someone's got to pay.
I'm afraid that I can't satisfy myself
and that my happiness depends on someone else.
I feel weak, so you're gonna take the fall.
You're so shallow.
- Jewel
Success depends upon previous preparation,
and without such preparation there is sure to be failure.
- Confucius
Our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions
and not on our circumstances.
- Martha Washington
Happiness depends more on the inward disposition of mind,
than on outward circumstances.
- Benjamin Franklin
The greater part of our happiness or misery
depends on our dispositions and not on our circumstances.
- Martha Washington
Perhaps the truth depends on a walk around the lake.
- Wallace Stevens
My happiness depends on me.
- A Course in Miracles
In today's knowledge-based economy,
what you earn depends on what you learn.
- William J. Clinton
How far you go in life depends on you being
tender with the young,
compassionate with the aged,
sympathetic with the striving
and tolerant of the weak and the strong.
Because someday in life you will have been all of these.
- George Washington Carver
We cling to our own point of view,
as though everything depended on it.
Yet our opinions have no permanence;
like autumn and winter, they gradually pass away.
- Zhuangzi
I am a firm believer in the people.
If given the truth, they can be depended upon
to meet any national crisis.
The great point is to bring them the real facts.
- Abraham Lincoln
The awareness that health is dependent
upon habits that we control
makes us the first generation in history
that to a large extent determines its own destiny.
- Jimmy Carter
Dependence begets subservience and venality,
suffocates the germ of virtue,
and prepares fit tools for the designs of ambition.
- Thomas Jefferson
Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge:
it is those who know little, and not those who know much,
who so positively assert that this or that problem
will never be solved by science.
- Charles Darwin
Honor bespeaks worth. Confidence begets trust.
Service brings satisfaction.
Cooperation proves the quality of leadership.
- James Cash Penney
All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence;
then success is sure.
- Mark Twain
Is it ignorance or apathy?
Hey, I don't know and I don't care.
- Jimmy Buffett
Against logic there is no armor like ignorance.
- Laurence J. Peter
By giving us the opinions of the uneducated,
journalism keeps us in touch
with the ignorance of the community.
- Oscar Wilde
Fear always springs from ignorance.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Misunderstanding arising from ignorance breeds fear,
and fear remains the greatest enemy of peace.
- Lester B. Pearson
We fear things in proportion to our ignorance of them.
- Titus Livius
Ignorance and bungling with love
are better than wisdom and skill without.
- Henry David Thoreau
Ignorance is preferable to error,
and he is less remote from the truth who believes nothing
than he who believes what is wrong.
- Thomas Jefferson
Socialism is a philosophy of failure,
the creed of ignorance,
and the gospel of envy,
its inherent virtue is
the equal sharing of misery.
- Winston Churchill
The ignorance of one voter in a democracy impairs the security of all.
- John F. Kennedy
Beware of false knowledge;
it is more dangerous than ignorance.
- George Bernard Shaw
Real knowledge is to know the extent of one's ignorance.
- Confucius
The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance -
it is the illusion of knowledge.
- Daniel J. Boorstin
At the root of all the harm we cause is ignorance.
- Pema Chodron
Be - don't try to become.
Being is enlightenment, becoming is ignorance.
- Osho
I know nothing except the fact of my ignorance.
- Socrates
Where there is charity and wisdom,
there is neither fear nor ignorance.
- St. Francis of Assisi
Dignity is a mask we wear to hide our ignorance.
- Elbert Hubbard
The truth is incontrovertible,
malice may attack it, ignorance may deride it,
but in the end; there it is.
- Winston Churchill
Nothing in all the world is more dangerous
than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Where ignorance is our master,
there is no possibility of real peace.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama
Envy comes from people's ignorance of,
or lack of belief in, their own gifts.
- Jean Vanier
Uncertainty that comes from knowledge
(knowing what you don't know)
is different from uncertainty coming from ignorance.
- Isaac Asimov
Truth is by nature self-evident.
As soon as you remove the cobwebs of ignorance
that surround it, it shines clear.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
The greater our knowledge increases
the more our ignorance unfolds.
- John F. Kennedy
There comes a time in every man's education
when he arrives at the conviction that envy is ignorance,
that imitation is suicide,
that he must take himself for better or for worse as his portion.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Life is an organic whole. The basic problems of the people -
poverty, ignorance, disease and civic inertia - interlock.
To address one problem, we must address all.
Hence our emphasis on an integrated program
of livelihood, education, health and self-government.
- Jimmy Yen
All the Buddhas of all the ages have been
telling you a very simple fact:
Be - don't try to become.
Within these two words, be and becoming,
your whole life is contained.
Being is enlightenment, becoming is ignorance.
- Osho
If the children are untaught,
their ignorance and vices will in future life
cost us much dearer in their consequences
than it would have done in their
correction by a good education.
- Thomas Jefferson
Every optimist moves along with progress and hastens it,
while every pessimist would keep the worlds at a standstill.
The consequence of pessimism in the life of a nation
is the same as in the life of the individual.
Pessimism kills the instinct that
urges men to struggle against poverty,
ignorance and crime, and dries up
all the fountains of joy in the world.
- Helen Keller
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.