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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Cough Quotes
Funny Quotes about Cough

Let these funny Cough Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

Oh, if only God would give me some sign.
If He would just speak to me once. Anything.
One sentence. Two words. If He would just cough.
- the movie Love and Death

The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde PHOTO

The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec

Life is like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute -
only the last couple seconds are fatal,
but most people are scared to death the whole way down.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin

You ask me if I keep a notebook
to record my great ideas.
I've only ever had one.
- Albert Einstein

I don't want to move to a city where the only cultural advantage
is being able to make a right turn on a red light.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall


 

Money is better than poverty,
if only for financial reasons.
- Woody Allen

Only a fool tests the depth of the water with both feet.
- African Proverb

There is no such thing as public opinion.
There is only published opinion.
- Winston Churchill

It is only the poor who pay cash,
and that not from virtue,
but because they are refused credit.
- Anatole France

The reason I talk to myself is because
I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
- George Carlin

Nothing in life is to be feared.
It is only to be understood.
- Marie Curie

I believe totally in a Capitalist System,
I only wish that someone would try it.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

I only wish that ordinary people
had an unlimited capacity for doing harm;
then they might have an unlimited power for doing good.
- Socrates

The only advantage of not being too good a housekeeper
is that your guests are so pleased
to feel how very much better they are.
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Life only
appears to be
rushing toward us
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Less is only more where more is no good.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born
at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.
- Mark Twain

Only dead fish swim with the stream.
- Anonymous

The physician can bury his mistakes,
but the architect can only advise his client to plant vines -
so they should go as far as possible from home
to build their first buildings.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition,
is not only a waste of energy
but the worst habit you could possibly have.
- Dale Carnegie

The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
- George Carlin

You are only young once,
but you can stay immature indefinitely.
- Anonymous

I always pass on good advice.
It is the only thing to do with it.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde

Human beings are the only creatures on the planet
who tell time and think they have to earn a living.
- Buckminster Fuller

There are three hundred and sixty-four days
when you might get un-birthday presents,
and only one for birthday presents, you know.
- Lewis Carroll

Politics is almost as exciting as war, and quite as dangerous.
In war you can only be killed once, but in politics many times.
- Winston Churchill

The only true love is love at first sight;
second sight dispels it.
- Israel Zangwill

Love is only a dirty trick played on us
to achieve continuation of the species.
- W. Somerset Maugham

Things may come to those who wait,
but only the things left by those who hustle.
- Abraham Lincoln

Boys will be boys. And even that wouldn't matter
if only we could prevent girls from being girls.
- Anne Frank

The essence of all religions is one.
Only their approaches are different.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi

The claim "I was only following orders" has been used
to justify too many tragedies in our history.
- Captain Picard of the television series
STAR TREK: The Next Generation

Only two things are infinite,
the universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein

Magic is natural to Wizards,
and only a little harder for the rest of us.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education.
- Albert Einstein

I've developed a new philosophy...
I only dread one day at a time.
- the character Charlie Brown in Charles M. Schulz' Peanuts comic

There is only one thing about which I am certain,
and that is that there is very little
about which one can be certain.
- W. Somerset Maugham

If you want total security, go to prison.
There you're fed, clothed, given medical care and so on.
The only thing lacking... is freedom.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Advertisements contain the only truths
to be relied on in a newspaper.
- Thomas Jefferson

History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely
only after they have exhausted all other alternatives.
- Abba Eban

A doctor can bury his mistakes
but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.
- Frank Lloyd Wright

The attempt to combine wisdom and power
has only rarely been successful and then only for a short while.
- Albert Einstein

Too often the strong, silent man is silent only because
he does not know what to say, and is reputed strong
only because he has remained silent.
- Winston Churchill

I never make stupid mistakes.
Only very, very clever ones.
- John Peel

We have only this moment,
sparkling like a star in our hand -
and melting like a snowflake.
- Marie B. Ray

You're only here for a short visit.
Don't hurry. Don't worry.
And be sure to smell the flowers along the way.
- Walter Hagen

The only thing necessary for evil to triumph
is for enough good men to do nothing.
- Edmund Burke

Life is an adventure.
I can only wonder what treasure
awaits at the top of the path.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

There are only two or three human stories,
and they go on repeating themselves as fiercely
as if they had never happened before.
- Willa Cather

There are no facts, only interpretations.
- Friedrich Nietzsche

Move out of your comfort zone. You can only
grow if you are willing to feel awkward and
uncomfortable when you try something new.
- Brian Tracy

Darkness cannot drive out darkness;
only light can do that.
Hate cannot drive out hate;
only love can do that.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.

Universal compassion is the only guarantee of morality.
- Arthur Schopenhauer

There are only two ways to live your life.
One is as though nothing is a miracle.
The other is as though everything is a miracle.
- Albert Einstein

If the only prayer you said in your whole life was,
Thank you, that would suffice.
- Meister Eckhart

Play with life, laugh with life,
dance lightly with life,
and smile at the riddles of life,
knowing that life's only true lessons
are writ small in the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Majority rule only works if you're also
considering individual rights,
because you can't have five wolves and one sheep
voting on what to have for dinner.
- Larry Flynt

Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.
- Robert F. Kennedy

Friendship is born at that moment
when one person says to another,
"What! You too? I thought I was the only one."
- C. S. Lewis

Miracles are the natural way of the Universe -
our only job is to move our doubting minds aside
and let the miracles flow.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Hate is never conquered by hate,
Hate is only conquered by love.
- The Buddha

One can not reflect in streaming water.
Only those who know internal peace can give it to others.
- Lao Tzu

People only see what they are prepared to see.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Only in the agony of parting do we look into the depths of love.
- George Eliot

If your only tool is a hammer,
you tend to see every problem as a nail.
- Abraham Maslow

The only thing we have to fear is fear itself -
nameless, unreasoning, unjustified terror
which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance.
- Franklin D. Roosevelt

The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
- Dale Carnegie

There is no neutrality.
There is only greater or lesser
awareness of one's bias.
- Phyllis Rose

You have to accept whatever comes
and the only important thing is that you meet it with courage
and with the best that you have to give.
- Eleanor Roosevelt


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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