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Funny Quotes about Life
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Funny Baseball Quotes
Funny Quotes about Baseball

Let these funny Baseball Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

A life is not important except in
the impact it has on other lives.
- Jackie Robinson (baseball player)

During his training, a baseball player strives
to make each swing better than the last.
The repetition of a faulty swing would be worse than useless.
It would ingrain bad habits.
The same is true of emotional responses.
If we allow ourselves to continue to have the same angry responses,
we just entrench our anger habit.
But if we strive - through consciousness, visualization, and coaching -
to moderate our anger response,
over time, we can train ourselves to respond
to events as we choose - without anger.
You can't magically be free from anger tomorrow,
but you can put yourself on your own training program
that will reduce the frequency and intensity
of your anger response day by day, year by year.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute -
only the last couple seconds are fatal,
but most people are scared to death the whole way down.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life ... full of loneliness, and misery,
and suffering, and unhappiness,
and it's all over much too quickly.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall


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Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz

The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec

The trick is growing up without growing old.
- Casey Stengel


 

Morality is simply the attitude we adopt
towards people whom we personally dislike.
- Oscar Wilde

It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble.
It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
- Mark Twain (attributed)

I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner

Life's like Vegas. You're up, you're down,
but in the end the house always wins.
Doesn't mean you didn't have fun.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill

You can't make an omelet without breaking eggs.
- Anonymous

Life is a journey - enjoy the journey.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

To the young child, all life is a great adventure -
when did we grow so dull and brittle.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.
- John Lennon

Life only
appears to be
rushing toward us
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous

Life is defined more by its contrasts than its samenesses;
Life is defined more by its risks than the many securities.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
- Oscar Wilde

In the book of life, the answers aren't in the back.
- Charles M. Schulz in his Peanuts cartoon

Old age is fifteen years older than I am.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

No matter how much cats fight,
there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
- Abraham Lincoln

If life is a trial, who is the judge and jury?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Live life on the edge, not with an edge.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The difference between school and life?
In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test.
In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson.
- Tom Bodett

One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
- Ogden Nash

Life is serious, get out your magic wand.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is always lived in the eye-of-the-storm
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born
at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.
- Mark Twain

Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
- Mark Twain

Life is best when I wish neither to hurry the future nor to slow it.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Most men lead lives of quiet desperation
and go to the grave with the song still in them.
- Henry David Thoreau

Only a fool tests the depth of the water with both feet.
- African Proverb

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...
It's about learning to Dance in the Rain.
- Vivian Greene

Life is a succession of lessons
which must be lived to be understood.
- Helen Keller

The book of life is filled with incoherent riddles.
Life's true lessons are inscribed in a corner of the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

All people know the same truth.
Our lives consist of how we chose to distort it.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

Some things will never seem adequate
no matter how hard we try.
- from the movie White Man's Burden

I have found that if you love life,
life will love you back.
- Arthur Rubinstein

Joy is a choice - but it isn't an easy choice.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

She generally gave herself very good advice,
(though she very seldom followed it).
- Lewis Carroll

It's not the men in your life that counts,
it's the life in your men.
- Mae West, in the movie I'm No Angel

A big part of letting go is recognizing
when it is time to stay in a situation
and when it is time to move on.
- Darren L. Johnson

Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask "Why me?"
Then a voice answers "Nothing personal,
your name just happened to come up. -
- Charlie Brown, in Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts

Life's burdens are lighter when I laugh at myself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

A common denominator of all religions is that
they have the power to bring out the best and the worst in people.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition,
is not only a waste of energy
but the worst habit you could possibly have.
- Dale Carnegie

We make our friends; we make our enemies;
but God makes our next-door neighbor.
- Gilbert (G. K.) Chesterton

I Dream This Day of Wondrous Things,
of Peace and Hope and Pride.
I Dance My Dance with Life Today,
I'm Filled with Love Inside.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Laugh when you can,
apologize when you should,
and let go of what you can't change.
Life's too short to be anything... but happy.
- Anonymous

It's never too late -
never too late to start over,
never too late to be happy.
- Jane Fonda

You don't have the power to make life "fair,"
but you do have the power to make life joyful.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If life is a bowl of cherries, then what am I doing in the pits?
- Erma Bombeck

Here's a toast to your new bride who has everything a girl
could want in her life, except for good taste in men.
- Anonymous

The power of man has grown in every sphere, except over himself.
- Winston Churchill

Normal is not something to aspire to,
it's something to get away from.
- Jodie Foster

The most powerful force in the universe is: gossip.
- Dave Barry

Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller

Success is failure recycled.
Life is death reborn.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Every man prefers belief to the exercise of judgment.
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
- George Carlin

You are Never Too Old to Give or Get Gold Stars.
Show Your Honest Appreciation - Today.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Am I not destroying my enemies
when I make friends of them?
- Abraham Lincoln

When dealing with people, remember you are
not dealing with creatures of logic,
but creatures of emotion.
- Dale Carnegie

The life of inner peace,
being harmonious and without stress,
is the easiest type of existence.
- Norman Vincent Peale

I don't believe in the after life,
although I am bringing a change of underwear.
- Woody Allen

Life is too important to be taken seriously.
- Oscar Wilde

Knowing your own darkness is the best method
for dealing with the darknesses of other people.
- Carl Jung

Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates.
You never know what you're gonna get.
- the movie Forrest Gump

I never accepted the idea
that I had to be guided by
some pattern or blueprint.
- Little Richard


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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