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Let these funny Army Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
Really I feel less keen about the Army every day.
I think the Church would suit me better.
- Winston Churchill
Join the army. Visit strange and exotic places.
Meet fascinating people. And kill them.
- Anonymous
Education is a better safeguard of liberty than a standing army.
- Edward Everett
The sergeant is the Army.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
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The supreme quality for leadership is unquestionably integrity.
Without it, no real success is possible,
no matter whether it is on a section gang,
a football field, in an army, or in an office.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
Be all you can be.
- US Army
Remember, if you ever need a helping hand,
you'll find one at the end of your arm.
- Audrey Hepburn
Banking establishments are more dangerous than standing armies.
- Thomas Jefferson
We did not raise armies for glory or for conquest.
- Thomas Jefferson
An invasion of armies can be resisted,
but not an idea whose time has come.
- Victor Hugo
I sincerely believe that banking establishments
are more dangerous than standing armies,
and that the principle of spending money
to be paid by posterity, under the name of funding,
is but swindling futurity on a large scale.
- Thomas Jefferson
Honor your being,
Release each and every struggle,
Gather strength from life's storms,
Relax into the arms of spirit.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Farewell My Friend
It was beautiful as long as it lasted
The journey of my life.
I have no regrets whatsoever
save the pain I'll leave behind.
Those dear hearts who love and care...
And the strings pulling at the heart and soul...
The strong arms that held me up
When my own strength let me down.
At every turning of my life
I came across good friends,
Friends who stood by me,
Even when the time raced me by.
Farewell, farewell my friends
I smile and bid you goodbye.
No, shed no tears for I need them not
All I need is your smile.
If you feel sad do think of me
for that's what I'll like
when you live in the hearts
of those you love, remember then
you never die.
- Gitanjali Ghei
Among the many misdeeds of the British rule in India,
history will look upon the act of
depriving a whole nation of arms as the blackest.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Your life within God's arms,
Your dance within God's arms,
Is already Perfect!
- Hafiz
Open your arms to change, but don't let go of your values.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama
Together we must learn how to compose differences,
not with arms, but with intellect and decent purpose.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
I Relax Into The Arms Of Spirit.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Today is my day to honor my being,
release each and every struggle,
gather strength from life's storms,
relax into the arms of spirit.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
No free man shall ever be debarred the use of arms.
- Thomas Jefferson
The strongest reason for the people
to retain the right to keep and bear arms is,
as a last resort, to protect themselves
against tyranny in government.
- Thomas Jefferson
Know that to find comfort, relax into the arms of Spirit.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Know that anger is always fear and frustration.
What if we could lean back into the arms of Spirit
and trust the future?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If you go on with this nuclear arms race,
all you are going to do is make the rubble bounce.
- Winston Churchill
Today is your day to honor your being,
release each and every struggle,
gather strength from life's storms,
relax into the arms of spirit.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Honor True Self
Forgive with Compassion
Receive ALL of life with Thanksgiving
CHOOSE with Thoughtful Consideration
Dream with Powerful Vision
Act with Bold Courage
Dance with a Light Heart
Relax in the Arms of Spirit
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Rock 'n' roll is ridiculous. It's absurd.
In the past, U2 was trying to duck that.
Now we're wrapping our arms around it and giving it a great big kiss.
- Bono
The Master teaches that the way of qigong cannot be hurried.
Wuji refers to the time before the creation -
when everything was formless.
Standing in the wuji position, my feet are parallel
to each other, shoulder-width apart.
My knees are slightly bent,
and the tip of my tongue touches the roof of my mouth.
My arms are held in front of me with my elbows bent
and my palms parallel to each other - about four inches apart.
At first I focus on my breathing, and only my breathing.
Later, I visualize the energy or "Qi" between my palms.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I've always believed that if done properly,
armed robbery doesn't have to be an unpleasant experience.
- the movie Thelma & Louise
For a people who are free, and who mean to remain so,
a well-organized and armed militia is their best security.
- Thomas Jefferson
It is the things for which there is no evidence
that are believed with passion.
- Bertrand Russell
Why, sometimes I've believed as many as
six impossible things before breakfast.
- Lewis Carroll
Sometimes I've believed as many as
six impossible things before breakfast.
- Lewis Carroll
We are all atheists about most of the gods
that societies have ever believed in.
Some of us just go one god further.
- Richard Dawkins
My father always told me that
all businessmen were sons of bitches,
but I never believed it till now.
- John F. Kennedy
Those who won our independence...
valued liberty as an end and as a means.
They believed liberty to be the secret of happiness
and courage to be the secret of liberty.
- Louis D. Brandeis
Nothing is so firmly believed as what is least known.
- Michel de Montaigne
No statement should be believed because it is made by an authority.
- Robert A. Heinlein
Only those who can leave behind everything they
have ever believed in can hope to escape.
- William S. Burroughs
Friendship, like the immortality of the soul,
is too good to be believed.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Even the truth, when believed, is a lie.
You must experience the truth, not believe it.
- Werner Erhard
Real love is never a selfish emotion.
If you want something from someone -
especially if that something is sex -
what you are feeling is not true love.
True love is about wanting happiness for the person you love -
and not about seeking happiness for yourself.
Fortunately, in most cases our own loving presence
is the greatest gift we can give to a person we love.
Nonetheless, the litmus test of love is knowing
we would choose never to see that person again
if we believed that distance would bring them greater happiness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Love conquers all things except poverty and a toothache.
- Mae West
There are two things that are more difficult
than making an after-dinner speech:
climbing a wall which is leaning toward you
and kissing a girl who is leaning away from you.
- Winston Churchill
You'll live to be a hundred if you give up
all the things that make you want to.
- the movie Interiors
Of all the things that could frighten you,
you worry about my driving?
- Edward, from Twilight saga by Stephenie Meyer
Two things are infinite:
the universe and human stupidity;
and I'm not sure about the universe.
- Albert Einstein
Oh, Shrek. Don't worry.
Things just seem bad because it's dark and rainy
and Fiona's father hired a sleazy hitman to whack you.
- the movie Shrek 2
What this country needs is a credit card for
charging things to experience.
- Tom Wilson
There's a couple of things they don't teach you
in Harvard Business School,
one is how to cope with defeat,
the other is how to handle a shotgun.
- The Simpsons Movie (2007)
Still, things could be a lot worse.
Oh, that's right... I'm falling to my death. Guess they can't.
- the movie Megamind (2010)
One good Husband is worth two good Wives;
for the scarcer things are, the more they're valued.
- Benjamin Franklin
Some things will never seem adequate
no matter how hard we try.
- from the movie White Man's Burden
Facts are stubborn things,
but statistics are more pliable.
- Laurence J. Peter
Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller
The man who can smile when things go wrong
has thought of someone else he can blame it on.
- Robert Bloch
Things may come to those who wait,
but only the things left by those who hustle.
- Abraham Lincoln
The trouble with the world is not
that people know too little,
but that they know so many things that ain't so.
- Mark Twain
The devil has put a penalty on all things we enjoy in life.
Either we suffer in health or we suffer in soul or we get fat.
- Albert Einstein
I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful,
natural, wholesome things that money can buy.
- Steve Martin
Too many people spend money they haven't earned,
to buy things they don't want,
to impress people they don't like.
- Will Rogers
Things have never been more like the way they are today in history.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
The trouble with having an open mind, of course,
is that people will insist on coming along
and trying to put things in it.
- Terry Pratchett
Except in cases of necessity, which are rare,
leave your friend to learn
unpleasant things from his enemies;
they are ready enough to tell them.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
True believers just don't see things the way they are,
because if they did, they wouldn't be true believers anymore.
- Philip Caputo
Few things are harder to put up with
than the annoyance of a good example.
- Mark Twain
Only two things are infinite,
the universe and human stupidity,
and I'm not sure about the former.
- Albert Einstein
"The time has come," the walrus said, "to talk of many things:
of shoes and ships - and sealing wax - of cabbages and kings."
- Lewis Carroll
All things at first appear difficult.
- Chinese proverb
I Dream This Day of Wondrous Things,
of Peace and Hope and Pride.
I Dance My Dance with Life Today,
I'm Filled with Love Inside.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Sometimes I wonder if we shall ever grow up
in our politics and say definite things which mean something,
or whether we shall always go on using generalities
to which everyone can subscribe, and which mean very little.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.