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Let these funny Agitate Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
A reporter is always concerned with tomorrow.
There's nothing tangible of yesterday.
All I can say I've done is
agitate the air ten or fifteen minutes
and then boom - it's gone.
- Edward R. Murrow
Well, when you come down to it,
I don't see that a reporter could do much to a president, do you?
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
Well, you ask a silly question, and you get a silly answer.
- Tom Lehrer
You're already a bastard.
Might as well be an enlightened one.
- the movie Simon Birch
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Trust your own instinct.
Your mistakes might as well be your own,
instead of someone else's.
- Billy Wilder
You may as well laugh at life,
because it's certainly laughing at you.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I find that principles have no real force
except when one is well fed.
- Mark Twain
The length of this document defends it well
against the risk of its being read.
- Winston Churchill
If everything seems to be going well,
you have obviously overlooked something.
- Anonymous
Thank God men cannot fly, and lay waste
the sky as well as the earth.
- Henry David Thoreau
You can always tell when a man's well informed.
His views are pretty much like your own.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
Well excuse me - we've got something
a little unusual going on here -
time travel, parallel universes,
or just a little common ordinary insanity.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
What would be the use of immortality to a person
who cannot use well a half an hour.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
It's not very heroic to slay dragons.
Dragons are generally very peaceful and well behaved.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother
why the bride changed her mind.
What do you mean? responded her mother.
Well, she went down the aisle with one man,
and came back with another.
- Anonymous
Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed.
- Mark Twain
A well-developed sense of humor
is the pole that adds balance to your steps,
as you walk the tightrope of life.
- William Arthur Ward
Trust your own inner guidance.
Have faith that your steps are
carrying you toward your dreams.
Keep your eyes on the heavens
and believe that your feet will carry you well.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Imagine for yourself a character,
a model personality whose example you determine to follow,
in private as well as in public.
- Epictetus
Never trust a man who speaks well of everybody
- John Churton Collins
We have nearly complete misunderstanding between
people of different faiths in Lake Wobegon,
and that's probably one reason why we get along so very well.
It's when you are trying to convince another person to think
the same way that you do that there is
friction and trouble between people.
But when you feel that the other person is
dumber than dirt, too dumb for words -
why waste your breath - you get along pretty well.
There's no bond between people that's quite so strong as
when people each feel slightly superior towards the other one.
- Garrison Keillor
If a man is called to be a street sweeper,
he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted,
or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry.
He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts
of heaven and earth will pause to say,
here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Hatred is blind, as well as love.
- Oscar Wilde
Hold on... Joyfully.
Holding-on does not have to be
a desperate teeth-gritting kind of holding-on.
Holding-on can be a joyful
"this is just the nature of Life,
so I may as well enjoy it"
kind of holding-on.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is a dangerous - ultimately fatal - endeavor,
so you may as well live it full out.
Chart your course, cast off the lines,
and boldly sail the seas of life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Live Well, Love Much, Laugh Often.
- Anonymous
Being angry harms your physical,
emotional, and spiritual well-being.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The simplification of life is one of the steps to inner peace.
A persistent simplification will create an inner and outer well-being
that places harmony in one's life.
- Peace Pilgrim
Well-behaved women seldom make history.
- Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
Treat the earth well.
It was not given to you by your parents,
it was loaned to you by your children.
We do not inherit the Earth from our Ancestors,
we borrow it from our Children.
- Native American traditional
Whatever your life's work is, do it well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
The best friend is the man who in wishing me well
wishes it for my sake.
- Anonymous
If you want something to be different than it is,
you might as well teach a cat to bark.
Wanting something to be different than it is, is hopeless.
- Byron Katie
Rights that do not flow from duty
well performed are not worth having.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Is it not enough to know the evil to shun it?
If not, we should be sincere enough to admit
that we love evil too well to give it up.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Life may not be the party we hoped for,
but while we are here we might as well dance.
- Anonymous
Well-being is making its way to you at all times.
If you will relax and find a way to allow it,
it will be your experience.
- Abraham (Esther Hicks)
I distrust those people who know so well
what God wants them to do,
because I notice it always coincides
with their own desires.
- Susan B. Anthony
Be careful to leave your sons well instructed rather than rich,
for the hopes of the instructed
are better than the wealth of the ignorant.
- Epictetus
No man who is occupied in doing a very difficult thing,
and doing it very well, ever loses his self-respect.
- George Bernard Shaw
The more we care for the happiness of others,
the greater is our own sense of well-being.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama
How many things there are concerning which we might
well deliberate whether we had better know them.
- Henry David Thoreau
Whatever your life's work is, do it well.
A man should do his job so well that the living,
the dead, and the unborn could do it no better.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Whenever the people are well-informed,
they can be trusted with their own government.
- Thomas Jefferson
As a well-spent day brings happy sleep,
so a life well spent brings happy death.
- Leonardo da Vinci
What is once well done is done forever.
- Henry David Thoreau
Everybody needs beauty as well as bread.
- John Muir
To the well-organized mind,
death is but the next great adventure.
- J. K. Rowling
Violence, even well intentioned,
always rebounds upon oneself.
- Lao Tzu
Before we acquire great power
we must acquire wisdom to use it well.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Have the will to be well, to be happy, and to live in joy.
- Ernest Holmes
Heaven is under our feet as well as over our heads.
- Henry David Thoreau
A well-spent day brings happy sleep.
- Leonardo da Vinci
See God in every person, place, and thing,
and all will be well in your world.
- Louise L. Hay
Your point of view sets you up well in advance
for how you view the events as they unfold.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Every actual State is corrupt.
Good men must not obey laws too well.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
For a people who are free, and who mean to remain so,
a well-organized and armed militia is their best security.
- Thomas Jefferson
No face which we can give to a matter
will stead us so well at last as the truth.
This alone wears well.
- Henry David Thoreau
There is no point at which you can say,
"Well, I'm successful now.
I might as well take a nap."
- Carrie Fisher
Good men must not obey the laws too well.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Look well into thyself; there is a source of strength
which will always spring up if thou wilt always look there.
- Marcus Aurelius
The interests of a nation, when well understood,
will be found to coincide with their moral duties.
- Thomas Jefferson
Character is higher than intellect.
A great soul will be strong to live as well as think.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Those who can win a war well can rarely make a good peace
and those who could make a good peace
would never have won the war.
- Winston Churchill
The reward of a thing well done, is to have done it.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Ambition has one heel nailed in well,
though she stretch her fingers to touch the heavens.
- Lao Tzu
If you can't explain it simply,
you don't understand it well enough.
- Albert Einstein
Learn to do common things uncommonly well;
we must always keep in mind that anything
that helps fill the dinner pail is valuable.
- George Washington Carver
The well-timed question is more impacting than an answer.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Art for art's sake is a philosophy of the well-fed.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Always aim at complete harmony
of thought and word and deed.
Always aim at purifying your thoughts
and everything will be well.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.