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Let these funny Plutarch Quotes lighten up your life. And check out the humorous quotes of many more funny authors in my large collection.
The mind is not a vessel to be filled
but a fire to be kindled.
- Plutarch
Neither blame or praise yourself.
- Plutarch
Now, if you don't mind, I'd appreciate it if you could lower your wand.
- the movie Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
The power of man has grown in every sphere, except over himself.
- Winston Churchill
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Just once in a while, let us exalt
the importance of ideas and information.
- Edward R. Murrow
One cannot have everything the way he would like it.
A man has no business to be depressed by a disappointment,
anyway; he ought to make up his mind to get even.
- Mark Twain
I got a good mind to join a club
and beat you over the head with it.
- the Groucho Marx movie Duck Soup
Today, I am Sending My Monkey Mind to the Zoo.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The believing mind is eternally impervious to evidence.
- H. L. Mencken
Faced with the choice between changing one's mind
and proving that there is no need to do so,
almost everyone gets busy on the proof.
- John Kenneth Galbraith
The natural cause of the human mind
is certainly from credulity to skepticism.
- Thomas Jefferson
A fanatic is one who can't change his mind
and won't change the subject.
- Winston Churchill
The human mind is our fundamental resource.
- John F. Kennedy
The will to believe chases out the rational mind,
whenever and wherever the two come into conflict.
- Philip K. Dick
The trouble with having an open mind, of course,
is that people will insist on coming along
and trying to put things in it.
- Terry Pratchett
God Loves an Open Mind, Clean Hands, and a Loving Heart.
So does Your Mother.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A little girl at the wedding afterwards asked her mother
why the bride changed her mind.
What do you mean? responded her mother.
Well, she went down the aisle with one man,
and came back with another.
- Anonymous
The mind has exactly the same power as the hands:
not merely to grasp the world, but to change it.
- Colin Wilson
Iron rusts from disuse;
water loses its purity from stagnation...
even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind.
- Leonardo da Vinci 
One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light,
but by making the darkness conscious.
- Carl Jung
Nothing is so firmly believed as what is least known.
- Michel de Montaigne
The moment a person forms a theory,
his imagination sees in every object
only the traits which favor that theory.
- Thomas Jefferson
Mind Chatter...
"I'm too fat; I'm too thin; and my hair is a fright;
And I'm never enough; and my world is not right;
I'm not smart; I'm not cute; I'm not strong; I'm a bust
I earn scorn; I earn hate; I'm no good; I disgust."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life does not consist mainly,
or even largely, of facts or happenings.
It consist mainly of the storm of thoughts
that is forever flowing through one's head.
- Mark Twain
The moment we want to believe something,
we suddenly see all the arguments for it,
and become blind to the arguments against it.
- George Bernard Shaw
To the mind that is still,
the whole universe surrenders.
- Lao Tzu
Bringing a childlike wonder
and a beginner's mind to life
maximizes both success and joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Beware the Rattlesnake of the Mind.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The eyes are not responsible when the mind does the seeing.
- Publilius Syrus
Man's mind, once stretched by a new idea,
never regains its original dimensions.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
There is more value in a very good painting
that is completed and on display,
than in an excellent painting
that is still in the artist's studio,
or perhaps still in his mind.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Nothing in all the world is more dangerous
than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
Few is the number of those
who think with their own mind
and feel with their own heart.
- Albert Einstein
A ruffled mind makes a restless pillow.
- Charlotte Bronte
The highest possible stage in moral culture
is when we recognize that we ought to control our thoughts.
- Charles Darwin
No problem can be solved from the same level
of consciousness that created it.
- Albert Einstein
As selfishness and complaint
pervert and cloud the mind,
so love with its joy
clears and sharpens the vision.
- Helen Keller
Happiness is a state of mind.
- Anonymous
Other people do not have to change
for us to experience peace of mind.
- Gerald Jampolsky
Education is not the filling of a pail,
but the lighting of a fire.
- William Butler Yeats
Doubt and mistrust are the mere panic of timid imagination,
which the steadfast heart will conquer,
and the large mind will transcend.
- Helen Keller
Every mind must make its choice
between truth and repose.
It cannot have both.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The human mind treats a new idea the way the body
treats a strange protein; it rejects it.
- Peter Medawar
The most dangerous phrase in the language is,
"We've always done it this way."
- Grace Hopper
I believe that a simple and unassuming manner of life
is best for everyone, best both for the body and the mind.
- Albert Einstein
The pendulum of the mind alternates
between sense and nonsense,
not between right and wrong.
- Carl Jung
Genuine heroes - no batteries needed -
bring lots of open-mind and at least a little courage.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The first principle is that you must not fool yourself -
and you are the easiest person to fool.
- Richard Feynman
Resistance creates suffering.
Stress happens when your mind resists what is.
The only problem in your life
is your mind's resistance to life as it unfolds.
- Dan Millman
Fear doesn't exist anywhere except in the mind.
- Dale Carnegie
Free-Will is the key to the prison of the mind.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The intuitive mind is a sacred gift
and the rational mind is a faithful servant.
We have created a society that honors the servant
and has forgotten the gift.
- Albert Einstein
Bodily decay is gloomy in prospect,
but of all human contemplations,
the most abhorrent is body without mind.
- Thomas Jefferson
Dare to be naive.
- Buckminster Fuller
Intuition will tell the thinking mind where to look next.
- Jonas Salk
No passion so effectually robs the mind of all its powers
of acting and reasoning as fear.
- Edmund Burke
Your worst enemy cannot harm you as much as
your own unguarded thoughts.
- The Buddha
You can chain me, you can torture me,
you can even destroy this body,
but you will never imprison my mind.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Jealousy is a disease, love is a healthy condition.
The immature mind often mistakes one for the other,
or assumes that the greater the love, the greater the jealousy -
in fact, they're almost incompatible;
one emotion hardly leaves room for the other.
Both at once can produce unbearable turmoil.
- Robert Heinlein
Open your mind, open your heart,
and the way to joy becomes clear.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
A mind, once stretched by a new idea,
never regains its original dimensions.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
Success is a state of mind.
If you want success,
start thinking of yourself as a success.
- Joyce Brothers
Mind what people do, not only what they say,
for deeds will betray a lie.
- Terry Goodkind
Life cannot be lived fully or joyfully if
our thoughts are focused on regretting the past,
preoccupied with anticipating the future,
or lost in the mind-fog of unconscious habitual behavior.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
When the heart-mind opens, the nectar of its flower is Joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The key to forgiveness is to forgive from the heart -
not from the mind.
- Sheri Rosenthal
If there is one principle more deeply rooted
in the mind of every American,
it is that we should have nothing to do with conquest.
- Thomas Jefferson
Our progress as a nation can be no swifter
than our progress in education.
The human mind is our fundamental resource.
- John F. Kennedy
Happiness depends more on the inward disposition of mind,
than on outward circumstances.
- Benjamin Franklin
Nothing is at last sacred, but the integrity of your own mind.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
A house is not a home unless it
contains food and fire
for the mind as well as the body.
- Benjamin Franklin
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.