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Let these funny Og Mandino Quotes lighten up your life. And check out the humorous quotes of many more funny authors in my large collection.
If I feel depressed I will sing.
If I feel sad I will laugh.
If I feel ill I will double my labor.
If I feel fear I will plunge ahead.
If I feel inferior I will wear new garments.
If I feel uncertain I will raise my voice.
If I feel poverty I will think of wealth to come.
If I feel incompetent I will think of past success.
If I feel insignificant I will remember my goals.
Today I will be the master of my emotions.
- Og Mandino
Today I will be the master of my emotions.
- Og Mandino
What you plant now, you will harvest later.
- Og Mandino
Count Your Blessings.
- Og Mandino
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Do all things with love.
- Og Mandino
Beginning today, treat everyone you meet
as if they were going to be dead by midnight.
Extend to them all the care,
kindness and understanding you can muster,
and do with no thought of any reward.
Your life will never be the same again.
- Og Mandino
Laugh at yourself and at life.
Not in the spirit of derision or whining self-pity,
but as a remedy, a miracle drug, that will ease your pain,
cure your depression, and help you to put in perspective
that seemingly terrible defeat and worry
with laughter at your predicaments,
thus freeing your mind to think clearly toward the solution
that is certain to come. Never take yourself too seriously.
- Og Mandino
Count your blessings. Once you realize
how valuable you are and how much you have going for you,
the smiles will return, the sun will break out,
the music will play, and you will finally
be able to move forward the life that God intended
for you with grace, strength, courage, and confidence.
- Og Mandino
I will greet this day with love in my heart.
And how will I do this?
Henceforth will I look on all things with love and be born again.
I will love the sun for it warms my bones;
yet I will love the rain for it cleanses my spirit.
I will love the light for it shows me the way;
yet I will love the darkness for it shows me the stars.
I will welcome happiness as it enlarges my heart;
yet I will endure sadness for it opens my soul.
I will acknowledge rewards for they are my due;
yet I will welcome obstacles for they are my challenge.
- Og Mandino
I'm going to go in the bathroom and scream.
I'll be out in a minute.
- the Woody Allen movie What's New Pussycat
I'm awash in self-contempt!
- the Woody Allen movie Celebrity
I feel the need to express something,
but I don't know what it is I want to express.
- the movie Interiors
It's so sweet, I feel like my teeth
are rotting when I listen to the radio.
- Bono
It has always been a mystery to me
how men can feel themselves honored
by the humiliation of their fellow beings.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Really I feel less keen about the Army every day.
I think the Church would suit me better.
- Winston Churchill
Although personally I am quite content with existing explosives,
I feel we must not stand in the path of improvement.
- Winston Churchill
I love to shop after a bad relationship.
I don't know. I buy a new outfit
and it makes me feel better. It just does.
Sometimes I see a really great outfit,
I'll break up with someone on purpose.
- Rita Rudner
I'm saving that rocker for the day
when I feel as old as I really am.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
I feel coming on a strange disease - humility.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
The only advantage of not being too good a housekeeper
is that your guests are so pleased
to feel how very much better they are.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Do you feel stuck?
Whether in a project, a job, a relationship,
or some other situation,
there is a time for perseverance,
and a time for letting go and moving on.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie 
Whenever I feel the need to exercise,
I lie down until it goes away.
- Robert Maynard Hutchins
I am a Passionate Observer of Life.
I See the events, feel the emotions,
and recognize the difference.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
People will forget what you said,
people will forget what you did,
but people will never forget
how you made them feel.
- Maya Angelou
Move out of your comfort zone. You can only
grow if you are willing to feel awkward and
uncomfortable when you try something new.
- Brian Tracy
Do what you feel in your heart to be right.
You'll be criticized anyway.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Life is full of beauty. Notice it.
Notice the bumble bee, the small child,
and the smiling faces.
Smell the rain, and feel the wind.
Live your life to the fullest potential,
and fight for your dreams.
- Ashley Smith
Every time you don't follow your inner guidance,
you feel a loss of energy, a loss of power,
a sense of spiritual deadness.
- Shakti Gawain
Feel the fear and do it anyway.
- Susan Jeffers
The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy
is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet,
alone with the heavens, nature and God.
Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be.
- Anne Frank
Few is the number of those
who think with their own mind
and feel with their own heart.
- Albert Einstein
"How do you spell 'love'?" asked Piglet.
"You don't spell it...you feel it." answered Pooh.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Confession of errors is like a broom
which sweeps away the dirt
and leaves the surface brighter and clearer.
I feel stronger for confession.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
We have nearly complete misunderstanding between
people of different faiths in Lake Wobegon,
and that's probably one reason why we get along so very well.
It's when you are trying to convince another person to think
the same way that you do that there is
friction and trouble between people.
But when you feel that the other person is
dumber than dirt, too dumb for words -
why waste your breath - you get along pretty well.
There's no bond between people that's quite so strong as
when people each feel slightly superior towards the other one.
- Garrison Keillor
I'm so glad I never feel important, it does complicate life!
- Eleanor Roosevelt
When you feel worried and depressed,
consciously form a smile on your face and act upbeat
until the happy feeling becomes genuine.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Never say goodbye when you still want to try,
never give up when you still feel you can't take it.
Never say you don't love the person anymore
when you can't let go.
- Anonymous
Few are those who see with their own eyes
and feel with their own hearts.
- Albert Einstein
We humans feel an instinctive need to know
what is coming next - what we can count upon.
We fear change - even the most positive change.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I'm half alive but I feel mostly dead.
- Jewel
It hurts to love someone
and not be loved in return,
but what is more painful is to love
someone and never find the courage
to let that person know how you feel.
- Anonymous
When you are offended at any man's fault,
turn to yourself and study your own failings.
Then you will forget your anger.
- Epictetus
Most truths are so naked
that people feel sorry for them
and cover them up,
at least a little bit.
- Edward R. Murrow
Everything we say, do, think, and feel
is a product of our personal history
and the collective history of humankind.
Our name for these histories is "prejudice."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Farewell My Friend
It was beautiful as long as it lasted
The journey of my life.
I have no regrets whatsoever
save the pain I'll leave behind.
Those dear hearts who love and care...
And the strings pulling at the heart and soul...
The strong arms that held me up
When my own strength let me down.
At every turning of my life
I came across good friends,
Friends who stood by me,
Even when the time raced me by.
Farewell, farewell my friends
I smile and bid you goodbye.
No, shed no tears for I need them not
All I need is your smile.
If you feel sad do think of me
for that's what I'll like
when you live in the hearts
of those you love, remember then
you never die.
- Gitanjali Ghei
There is nothing to do.
There is nothing to say.
There is nothing to think.
There is nothing to feel.
The River of Life just flows.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I get bored very easily, ...
I have a voracious appetite and I do not feel alive
if I'm repeating something I'm good at.
So I'm always looking for new challenges.
- Jewel
Home is where we feel comfortable.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Loneliness is not what it seems.
One does not feel lonely because one is alone,
but because of a feeling of lack -
a feeling that something is missing.
Loneliness is essentially independent
of how many other humans are around.
It has much more to do with one's self-esteem -
one's sense of inherent worth.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Just smiling goes a long way toward
making you feel better about life.
And when you feel better about life, your life is better.
- Art Linkletter
If we don't see a failure as a challenge to modify our approach,
but rather as a problem with ourselves, as a personality defect,
we will immediately feel overwhelmed.
- Anthony Robbins
Smell the smells, feel the fear,
and smile at the incoherent way
life runs us in circles
while inscribing the real lessons
in a corner of the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The more you know the less you feel.
- Bono
We ourselves feel that what we are doing
is just a drop in the ocean.
But the ocean would be less
because of that missing drop.
- Mother Teresa
Few are the giants of the soul that actually feel
that the human race is their family circle.
- Freya Stark
I feel exuberant. I don't pretend.
- Bono
The hardest of all, is learning to be
a well of affection, and not a fountain,
to show them that we love them,
not when we feel like it, but when they do.
- Nan Fairbrother
When I do good, I feel good.
When I do bad, I feel bad.
That's my religion.
- Abraham Lincoln
Love is saying "I feel differently,"
instead of "You're wrong."
- Anonymous
If you want to feel rich,
just count all of the things you have that money can't buy.
- Anonymous
We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing,
while others judge us by what we have already done.
- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
No partner in a love relationship...
should feel that he has to give up
an essential part of himself to make it viable.
- May Sarton
You can attract only that which you mentally become
and feel yourself to be in reality.
- Ernest Holmes
Identify your assumptions (what you believe).
Question how you feel when you hold those assumptions.
Visualize holding different assumptions.
Ask yourself how it feels to hold a different world-view.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
If you ask a stupid question, you may feel stupid;
if you don't ask a stupid question, you remain stupid.
- Tony Rothman
I learned that courage was not the absence of fear,
but the triumph over it.
The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid,
but he who conquers that fear.
- Nelson Mandela
I, with a deeper instinct,
choose a man who compels my strength,
who makes enormous demands on me,
who does not doubt my courage or my toughness,
who does not believe me naive or innocent,
who has the courage to treat me like a woman.
- Anais Nin
From far beyond this life,
I hear the call.
From place beyond all place,
I feel the call.
From time before all time,
I know the call.
From one before all ones,
I am the call.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Do what you feel in your heart to be right -
for you'll be criticized anyway.
You'll be damned if you do, and damned if you don't.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
I cannot know the pain you feel.
I cannot share your memories or your loss.
My words of sympathy are beneath measure, yet
know that my heart reaches out with love to your heart.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.