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Let these funny Nelson Henderson Quotes lighten up your life. And check out the humorous quotes of many more funny authors in my large collection.
The true meaning of life is to plant trees,
under whose shade you do not expect to sit.
- Nelson Henderson
If it's true that our species is alone in the universe,
then I'd have to say that the universe
aimed rather low and settled for very little.
- George Carlin
It is sad but unfortunately true that
man learns nothing from history.
- Carl Jung
A true friend stabs you in the front.
- Oscar Wilde
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True friendship's laws are by this rule express'd,
Welcome the coming, speed the parting guest.
- Alexander Pope
Faith: not wanting to know what is true.
- Friedrich Nietzsche
True love is like ghosts,
which everyone talks about and few have seen.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
All our dreams can come true,
if we have the courage to pursue them.
- Walt Disney 
Religion is regarded by the common people as true,
by the wise as false, and by the rulers as useful.
- Lucius Annaeus Seneca
I don't care what anybody says about me
as long as it isn't true.
- Truman Capote
The only true love is love at first sight;
second sight dispels it.
- Israel Zangwill
Children, cartoon animals, comedians,
and space aliens can get away with saying
what the rest of us are afraid is true,
but are embarrassed to talk about.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
True love comes quietly,
without banners or flashing lights.
If you hear bells, get your ears checked.
- Erich Segal
A true friend is one who
overlooks your failures
and tolerates your success.
- Doug Larson
There are a terrible lot of lies going about the world,
and the worst of it is that half of them are true.
- Winston Churchill
True believers just don't see things the way they are,
because if they did, they wouldn't be true believers anymore.
- Philip Caputo
This above all, to thine own self be true.
- William Shakespeare
The book of life is filled with incoherent riddles.
Life's true lessons are inscribed in a corner of the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The true mystery of the world is the visible, not the invisible.
- Oscar Wilde
People are stupid;
given proper motivation, almost anyone will believe almost anything.
Because people are stupid, they will believe a lie
because they want to believe it's true,
or because they are afraid it might be true.
- Terry Goodkind
A true friend is someone who
thinks that you are a good egg
even though he knows that
you are slightly cracked.
- Bernard Meltzer
I do not need anyone's permission to be my true self.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Where there is shouting, there is no true knowledge.
- Leonardo da Vinci
Every religion is true one way or another.
It is true when understood metaphorically.
But when it gets stuck in its own metaphors,
interpreting them as facts, then you are in trouble.
- Joseph Campbell
True love is a process of co-creation
in which neither feels ownership or superiority.
Jealousy is a highly destructive force
for love and relationships.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You do not need anyone's permission to be your true self.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Play with life, laugh with life,
dance lightly with life,
and smile at the riddles of life,
knowing that life's only true lessons
are writ small in the margin.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The secret of making dreams come true
can be summarized in four C's.
They are Curiosity, Confidence, Courage, and Constancy;
and the greatest of these is Confidence.
- Walt Disney
Man prefers to believe what he prefers to be true.
- Francis Bacon
For those of true faith, death is not a time to mourn,
but a time to celebrate returning to the Creator.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Your inner thoughts reveal your true nature.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The WORK
1.Is it true?
2.Can you absolutely know that it's true?
3.How do you react when you think that thought?
4.Who would you be without the thought?
- Byron Katie
True friendship is like sound health;
the value of it is seldom known until it be lost.
- Charles Caleb Colton
True friendship is never serene.
- Marquise de Sevigne
If I try to be like him, who will be like me?
- Yiddish proverb
True Love burns the brightest,
But the brightest flames leave the deepest scars.
- Anonymous
The course of true love never did run smooth.
- William Shakespeare
Those who realize their folly are not true fools.
- Zhuangzi
I used to believe in forever, but forever's too good to be true.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
If evil be spoken of you
and it be true, correct yourself,
if it be a lie, laugh at it.
- Epictetus
True learning is not about facts,
but about conscious appreciation
of the experience of living.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
True friendship is a plant of slow growth.
- George Washington
True happiness... is not attained
through self-gratification,
but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.
- Helen Keller
True wisdom comes to each of us when we realize
how little we understand about life,
ourselves, and the world around us.
- Socrates
A system of morality which is based
on relative emotional values
is a mere illusion, a thoroughly vulgar conception
which has nothing sound in it and nothing true.
- Socrates
The key to happiness is having dreams.
The key to success is making your dreams come true.
- Anonymous
Society censors our actions,
but our dreams reveal our true character.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Be true to your work, your word, and your friend.
- Henry David Thoreau
A true friend sees the good in everything,
and brings out the best in the worst of things.
- Sasha Azevedo
Guys are like stars, there are millions of them,
but only one to make your dreams come true.
- Anonymous
Only one who devotes himself to a cause
with his whole strength and soul
can be a true master.
For this reason mastery demands all of a person.
- Albert Einstein
Many persons have a wrong idea of
what constitutes true happiness.
It is not attained through self-gratification
but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.
- Helen Keller
True friends are appreciative and never demanding.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Under a government which imprisons any unjustly,
the true place for a just man is also a prison.
- Henry David Thoreau
Feigned courtesy is a mere shadow of true kindness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Know that you do not need anyone's permission
to be your true self.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Mastering others is strength.
Mastering yourself is true power.
- Lao Tzu
A true friend is a source of strength and hope.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
We seek opinions that are likely to
support what we want to be true.
- Thomas Gilovich
A true friend is one who believes in you
when you have ceased to believe in yourself.
- Anonymous
True independence is not a gift to be received.
It can't be a hand-out to people.
It must be an achievement by the people.
- Jimmy Yen
A true friend never gets in your way
unless you happen to be going down.
- Arnold H. Glasgow
Just because it's true, I say as often as I can
in as many ways as I can form, "I sure love you."
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Intolerance is itself a form of violence
and an obstacle to the growth of a true democratic spirit.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
There is nothing true anywhere,
The true is nowhere to be seen;
If you say you see the true,
This seeing is not the true one.
- Abraham Lincoln paraphrasing Lao Tzu' Tao te Ching
'Tis strange - but true;
for truth is always strange;
Stranger than fiction.
- Lord Byron
Trust men and they will be true to you;
treat them greatly and they will show themselves great.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
The only real failure in life is not to be true to the best one knows.
- The Buddha
The function of education is to teach one
to think intensively and to think critically.
Intelligence plus character - that is the goal of true education.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing.
- Socrates
True friends are those who lift you up
when your heart's wings forget how to fly.
- Anonymous
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.