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Joseph Addison Quotes
Funny Quotes by Joseph Addison

Let these funny Joseph Addison Quotes lighten up your life. And check out the humorous quotes of many more funny authors in my large collection.

Sunday clears away the rust of the whole week.
- Joseph Addison

Jealousy is that pain which a man feels
from the apprehension that he is not equally beloved
by the person whom he entirely loves.
- Joseph Addison

A man must be both stupid and uncharitable
who believes there is no virtue or truth but on his own side.
- Joseph Addison

Three grand essentials to happiness in this life are
something to do,
something to love,
and something to hope for.
- Joseph Addison


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If you wish to succeed in life,
make perseverance your bosom friend,
experience your wise counselor,
caution your elder brother,
and hope your guardian genius.
- Joseph Addison

When men are easy in their circumstances,
they are naturally enemies to innovations.
- Joseph Addison

If we hope for what we are not likely to possess,
we act and think in vain,
and make life a greater dream and shadow than it really is.
- Joseph Addison


 

To say that authority, whether secular or religious,
supplies no ground for morality
is not to deny the obvious fact that it supplies a sanction.
- Joseph Addison

He who would pass his declining years with honor and comfort,
should, when young, consider that he may one day become old,
and remember when he is old, that he has once been young.
- Joseph Addison

What sculpture is to a block of marble,
education is to the soul.
- Joseph Addison

Jealousy is all the fun you think they had.
- Erica Jong

A competent and self-confident person is
incapable of jealousy in anything.
Jealousy is invariably a symptom of neurotic insecurity.
- Robert A. Heinlein

True love is a process of co-creation
in which neither feels ownership or superiority.
Jealousy is a highly destructive force
for love and relationships.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie PHOTO

Keep your attention focused entirely
on what is truly your own concern,
and be clear that what belongs to others
is their business and none of yours.
- Epictetus

The jealous are troublesome to others,
but a torment to themselves.
- William Penn

To cure jealousy is to see it for what it is,
a dissatisfaction with self.
- Joan Didion

Suspicion and jealousy are the death knell of any relationship.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Jealousy is a child of selfishness and distrust.
- Mourning Dove

Wisdom I know is social.
She seeks her fellows.
But Beauty is jealous,
and illy bears the presence of a rival.
- Thomas Jefferson

Jealousy is the result of one's lack
of self-confidence, self-worth, and self-acceptance.
- Sasha Azevedo

Jealousy is a disease, love is a healthy condition.
The immature mind often mistakes one for the other,
or assumes that the greater the love, the greater the jealousy -
in fact, they're almost incompatible;
one emotion hardly leaves room for the other.
Both at once can produce unbearable turmoil.
- Robert Heinlein

O! beware, my lord, of jealousy;
It is the green-eyed monster which
doth mock the meat it feeds on.
- William Shakespeare

Love without jealousy. Love without need.
Let love be an unconditional gift.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I am the master of my emotions -
I transform fear to love, anger to compassion,
pain to comfort, scarcity to abundance,
expectation to gratitude, and jealousy to generosity.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If you have an emotional reaction in the presence of someone,
your heart is telling you that you have
not resolved your issues with them.
In other words, you have not truly forgiven that person.
All of this begs the question, how do we forgive?
First, cease lying to yourself and stop telling yourself stories
about why you behave the way you do.
Stop blaming your behavior on other people
and take responsibility for your emotional reactions.
If you could forgive all the people in your life
who have hurt or wounded you
it would be possible to be in control of your behavior
instead of being in reaction to other people all of the time.
Imagine living life without experiencing
a constant emotional roller-coaster of pain, anger, and jealousy!
That would be bliss!
-Sheri Rosenthal

You shall not covet your neighbor's house;
you shall not covet your neighbor's wife,
nor his male servant, nor his female servant,
nor his ox, nor his donkey, nor anything that is your neighbor's.
- Exodus 20:17

Life's like Vegas. You're up, you're down,
but in the end the house always wins.
Doesn't mean you didn't have fun.
- the Woody Allen movie Deconstructing Harry

A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail.
A best friend is the one sitting next
to you saying "boy was that fun."
- The Maugles

If you obey all the rules you miss all the fun.
- Katharine Hepburn

There is no pleasure in having nothing to do;
the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it.
- Mary Wilson Little

Procrastination is like a credit card:
it's a lot of fun until you get the bill.
- Christopher Parker

It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn't use long, difficult words
but rather short, easy words like "What about lunch?"
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)

Life is a game - a game you can never win.
You already know the final score: Life 1, You 0.
Doesn't mean you can't have fun playing.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It's work only if I say it's work,
but it's play if I say it's fun.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

If we like what we do, if we always do our best,
then we are really enjoying life.
We are having fun, we don't get bored,
we don't have frustrations.
- don Miguel Ruiz

We see Life through the fun-house mirrors of our point-of-view.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

It's kind of fun to do the impossible.
- Walt Disney

Become more and more innocent,
less knowledgeable and more childlike.
Take life as fun -
because that's precisely what it is!
- Osho

To love what you do and feel that it matters,
how on earth could anything be more fun.
- Katherine Graham

People rarely succeed unless they
have fun in what they are doing.
- Dale Carnegie

As a rock star, I have two instincts,
I want to have fun, and I want to change the world.
I have a chance to do both.
- Bono

I want to have fun, and I want to change the world.
I have a chance to do both.
- Bono

Love bravely, live bravely, be courageous;
there's really nothing to lose.
There's no wrong you can't make right again,
so be kinder to yourself;
have fun, take chances. There are no bounds.
- Jewel

Remember that "concern" is about the time, energy, and emotion
that we direct toward worrying about something or someone -
not whether we are for that something or against it.
However, nothing that we do for fun is ever a "concern."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I am the Wizard. This world is mine.
I speak. It's done. My realm is fine.
My wand, my tongue. My sword, my voice.
It's good. It's bad. I speak my choice.
I say happy, or I say mad.
I say angry, or I say glad.
I name that drawing on the wall.
It's not graffiti after all.
The past has been broken. The prison's not real.
My word holds the magic - the power to heal.
Intent is my weapon - a sword from above.
Cruel hate, fear, and anger transmute into love.
This world's my joy. This mouth's my toy.
Reborn -I'm a brand new girl or boy.
I choose. I speak. My will is done.
Come join. Come play. This can be fun.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Flying might not be all plain sailing,
but the fun of it is worth the price.
- Amelia Earhart

Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz

Life ... full of loneliness, and misery,
and suffering, and unhappiness,
and it's all over much too quickly.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall

Life is like jumping out of an airplane without a parachute -
only the last couple seconds are fatal,
but most people are scared to death the whole way down.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The trick is growing up without growing old.
- Casey Stengel

The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec

Morality is simply the attitude we adopt
towards people whom we personally dislike.
- Oscar Wilde

I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner

It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble.
It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
- Mark Twain (attributed)

Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born
at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.
- Mark Twain

If life is a trial, who is the judge and jury?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is serious, get out your magic wand.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Old age is fifteen years older than I am.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

One man's remorse is another man's reminiscence.
- Ogden Nash

In the book of life, the answers aren't in the back.
- Charles M. Schulz in his Peanuts cartoon

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.
- John Lennon

Life is always lived in the eye-of-the-storm
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The difference between school and life?
In school, you're taught a lesson and then given a test.
In life, you're given a test that teaches you a lesson.
- Tom Bodett

No matter how much cats fight,
there always seem to be plenty of kittens.
- Abraham Lincoln

Life only
appears to be
rushing toward us
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Life is defined more by its contrasts than its samenesses;
Life is defined more by its risks than the many securities.
- Mary Anne Radmacher

The most difficult phase of life
is not when no one understands you,
it is when you don't understand yourself.
- Anonymous

One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.
- Winston Churchill

Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.
- Mark Twain

Life is a journey - enjoy the journey.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

To the young child, all life is a great adventure -
when did we grow so dull and brittle.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie


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All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.