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Let these funny Darren L. Johnson Quotes lighten up your life. And check out the humorous quotes of many more funny authors in my large collection.
A big part of letting go is recognizing
when it is time to stay in a situation
and when it is time to move on.
- Darren L. Johnson
Hang tough... big girl panties today.
- Anonymous humor
When life gets you down -
just put on your big girl panties and deal with it.
- Anonymous humor
It takes a big cat to be number 2.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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Winners Dream Big Dreams.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Worry often gives a small thing a big shadow.
- Swedish Proverb
Think big thoughts but relish small pleasures.
- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
Our problems are man-made, therefore they may be solved by man.
And man can be as big as he wants.
No problem of human destiny is beyond human beings.
- John F. Kennedy
Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back
and realize they were the big things.
- Robert Brault
When you see someone putting on his Big Boots,
you can be pretty sure that an Adventure is going to happen.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Don't be afraid to take a big step if one is indicated;
you can't cross a chasm in two small jumps.
- David Lloyd George
Just because an animal is large, it doesn't mean he doesn't want kindness;
however big Tigger seems to be, remember that he wants as much kindness as Roo.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Life is a great big canvas,
and you should throw all the paint you can on it.
- Danny Kaye
The big question is whether you are going to be able
to say a hearty yes to your adventure.
- Joseph Campbell
Life is like dancing.
If we have a big floor, many people will dance.
Some will get angry when the rhythm changes.
But life is changing all the time.
- don Miguel Ruiz
If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it,
people will eventually come to believe it.
- Joseph Goebbels (Minister of Propaganda in Nazi Germany)
Your big opportunity may be right where you are now.
- Napoleon Hill
If you know what to do to reach your goal,
it's not a big enough goal.
- Bob Proctor
Speak softly and carry a big stick; you will go far.
- West African proverb famously quoted by Theodore Roosevelt
I am still amazed at how big, how enormous
a love and mystery God is -
and how small are the minds
that attempt to corral
this life force into rules and taboos,
cults and sects.
- Bono
Nothing big ever came from being small.
- William J. Clinton
Work Hard. Do your best. Keep your word.
Never get too big for your britches.
Trust in God. Have no fear;
and Never forget a friend.
- Harry S. Truman
We should be too big to take offense
and too noble to give it.
- Abraham Lincoln
People make a big fuss over you when you're President.
But I'm very serious about doing everything I can
to make sure that it doesn't go to my head.
- Jimmy Carter
We find delight in the beauty and happiness of children
that makes the heart too big for the body.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
You should never be content with so little,
when you can reach out for something big.
- Charles L. Allen
(This quote is about making a big difference
in the world - not about greed)
Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.
- Winston Churchill
Big sisters are the crabgrass in the lawn of life.
- Linus Van Pelt in Charles M. Schulz' Peanuts cartoon
Little minds have little worries,
big minds have no time for worries.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
There's a big difference between a handout and a helping hand.
One's charity, the other's friendship.
- Little Joe' Cartwright in Bonanza - Rain from Heaven
Believe in yourself. Dream big dreams.
Set important goals. Take action on those goals.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Death is just life's next big adventure.
- J. K. Rowling
All successful people men and women are big dreamers.
They imagine what their future could be,
ideal in every respect,
and then they work every day toward
their distant vision,
that goal or purpose.
- Brian Tracy
There is not one big cosmic meaning for all,
there is only the meaning we each give to our life,
an individual meaning, an individual plot,
like an individual novel, a book for each person.
- Anais Nin
It's the little things you do
that can make a big difference.
What are you attempting to accomplish?
What little thing can you do today
that will make you more effective?
You are probably only one step away from greatness.
- Bob Proctor
The greatest battle of all is simply... Life.
This is no child's game. This is the big one -
the Super Bowl - the Game of all games.
The rules of Life are unwritten and unknown.
Perhaps, one could say that there are no rules.
The Judge has ultimate power.
She can call the game at any time - for any reason.
The penalties in the Game are completely arbitrary -
in both timing and severity.
Penalty for what, we ask?
The Judge is silent.
How can I win the Game?
"You can never win," comes the answer,
"So just take pleasure in playing the Game."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Speak softly and carry a big stick; you will go far.
- Theodore Roosevelt
Rock 'n' roll is ridiculous. It's absurd.
In the past, U2 was trying to duck that.
Now we're wrapping our arms around it and giving it a great big kiss.
- Bono
To look at the cross-section of any plan of a big city
is to look at something like the section of a fibrous tumor.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
When you reach the end of your rope,
tie a knot and hang on.
- Anonymous Saying
(Sometimes attributed to Franklin D. Roosevelt,
Eleanor Roosevelt, or Thomas Jefferson)
We must all hang together,
or assuredly we shall all hang separately.
- Benjamin Franklin
We must, indeed, all hang together or,
most assuredly, we shall all hang separately.
- Benjamin Franklin
Great talents are the most lovely
and often the most dangerous
fruits on the tree of humanity.
They hang upon the most slender twigs
that are easily snapped off.
- Carl Jung
"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?"
Jesus replied:
"'Love the Lord your God with all your heart
and with all your soul and with all your mind.'
This is the first and greatest commandment.
And the second is like it:
'Love your neighbor as yourself.'
All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."
- Matthew 22:36-40
Home is our sanctuary, where we:
relax into being ourselves,
play with our inner child,
paint the walls green and pink,
dig in the dirt,
grow something,
love somebody else,
love ourselves even more,
snuggle with a warm blanket on a Sunday afternoon,
hang "go away" on the door whenever we want,
clean and tidy often... or never,
launch from and return to,
are truly ourselves.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
Don't go around saying the world owes you a living;
the world owes you nothing; it was here first.
- Mark Twain
If you do what you've always done,
you'll get what you always got.
- Mark Twain
However beautiful the strategy,
you should occasionally look at the results.
- Winston Churchill
Be careful not to do your good deeds
when there's no one watching you.
- Tom Lehrer
If you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- the movie The Matrix (1999)
It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble.
It's what you know for sure that just ain't so.
- Mark Twain (attributed)
Yesterday is like a dung heap;
you can complain about the smell,
or you can use it to fertilize tomorrow's garden.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
You want a friend in Washington? Get a dog.
- Harry S. Truman
Half the people you know are below average.
- Anonymous
Afraid? Me? A man who's licked
his weight in wild caterpillars?
Afraid? You bet I'm afraid!
- Groucho Marx
If love is the answer,
could you please rephrase the question.
- Lily Tomlin
Be careful about reading health books.
You may die of a misprint.
- Mark Twain
Oh no, I can't do anything to the death.
Doctor's orders. You see, I have this ulcer condition,
and death is the worst thing for it.
- the movie Love and Death
One great thing about getting old is that
you can get out of all sorts of social obligations
just by saying you're too tired.
- George Carlin
Getting divorced just because you don't love a man
is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly,
but I bet you ain't never seen a DONKEY fly!
- the movie Shrek (2001)
To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
- the Woody Allen movie Stardust Memories
You can put wings on a pig,
but you don't make it an eagle.
- William J. Clinton
You can lead a man to Congress,
but you can't make him think.
- Milton Berle
In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland
A relationship, I think, is like a shark.
You know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies.
And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall (1977)
When you are courting a nice girl
an hour seems like a second.
When you sit on a red-hot cinder
a second seems like an hour.
That's relativity.
- Albert Einstein
Will the people in the cheaper seats clap your hands?
And the rest of you, if you'll just rattle your jewelry.
- John Lennon
I read that you should never go out with someone
if you can think of three reasons why you shouldn't.
- the movie Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason (2004)
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.