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Let these funny Cicero Quotes lighten up your life. And check out the humorous quotes of many more funny authors in my large collection.
Friendship is the only thing in the world
concerning the usefulness of which all mankind are agreed.
- Cicero
A thankful heart is not only the greatest virtue,
but the parent of all other virtues.
- Cicero
A thankful heart is the greatest virtue.
- Cicero
No one can give you better advice than yourself.
- Cicero
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From wine what sudden friendship springs.
- John Gay
No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous
Nothing is more cheerful than talking
about our friends' shortcomings.
- Mason Cooley
A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler
I have lost friends, some by death ...
others by sheer inability to cross the street.
- Virginia Woolf
The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet
and steady and loyal and enduring a nature
that it will last through a whole lifetime,
if not asked to lend money.
- Mark Twain
Nothing echoes like an empty mailbox.
- Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts
The feeling of friendship is like that
of being comfortably filled with roast beef;
love, like being enlivened with champagne.
- Samuel Johnson
Everyone should have at least two friends -
one to talk to and one to talk about.
- Anonymous
The worst part of success is to try to find
someone who is happy for you.
- Bette Midler
Nothing makes the earth seem so spacious
as to have friends at a distance;
they make the latitudes and the longitudes.
- Henry David Thoreau
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin
A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail.
A best friend is the one sitting next
to you saying "boy was that fun."
- The Maugles
A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
- Erma Bombeck
A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend -
and he's a priest.
- Erma Bombeck
We make our friends; we make our enemies;
but God makes our next-door neighbor.
- Gilbert (G. K.) Chesterton
I never considered a difference of opinion
in politics, in religion, in philosophy,
as cause for withdrawing from a friend.
- Thomas Jefferson 
A lifelong friend is someone
you haven't borrowed money from yet.
- Anonymous
Do not use a hatchet to remove
a fly from your friend's forehead.
- Chinese Proverb
A loyal friend laughs at your jokes
when they're not so good,
and sympathizes with your problems
when they're not so bad.
- Arnold H. Glasgow
I choose my friends for their good looks,
my acquaintances for their good characters,
and my enemies for their intellects.
A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
- Oscar Wilde
A benevolent man should allow a few faults in himself,
to keep his friends in countenance.
- Benjamin Franklin
My father and he had one of those English friendships
which begins by avoiding the intimacies
and eventually eliminates speech altogether.
- Jorge Luis Borges
"Appeasement" is the policy of feeding your friends to a crocodile,
one at a time, in hopes that the crocodile will eat you last.
- Franklin D. Roosevelt
Marriage is a sort of friendship recognized by the police.
- Anonymous
Most people enjoy the inferiority of their best friends.
- Lord Chesterfield
I'm a very loyal and unreliable friend.
- Bono
Distance cannot matter - ours is a friendship of the heart.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Friendship is born at that moment
when one person says to another,
"What! You too? I thought I was the only one."
- C. S. Lewis
A true friend is one who
overlooks your failures
and tolerates your success.
- Doug Larson
Money can't buy friends
but it can get you a better class of enemy.
- Spike Milligan
It is far better to be alone,
than to be in bad company.
- George Washington
Nobody can be uncheered with a balloon.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.
- Oscar Wilde
A true friend stabs you in the front.
- Oscar Wilde
Contrary to general belief,
I do not believe that friends are necessarily
the people you like best,
they are merely the people who got there first.
- Peter Ustinov
True friendship is never serene.
- Marquise de Sevigne
True friendship's laws are by this rule express'd,
Welcome the coming, speed the parting guest.
- Alexander Pope
Give Honest and Sincere Appreciation.
- Dale Carnegie
Best Friends: we're a parade - even by ourselves!
- Mary Anne Radmacher
A true friend is someone who
thinks that you are a good egg
even though he knows that
you are slightly cracked.
- Bernard Meltzer
It is the friends you can call up at 4 A.M. that matter.
- Marlene Dietrich
A friend is someone who knows all about you,
and loves you just the same.
- Elbert Hubbard
Thy friendship oft has made my heart to ache;
do be my enemy - for friendship's sake.
- William Blake
I have lost my seven best friends,
which is to say that God has had mercy on me
seven times without realizing it.
He lent a friendship, took it from me, and sent me another.
- Jean Cocteau
True friendship is like sound health;
the value of it is seldom known until it be lost.
- Charles Caleb Colton
A happy family is but an earlier heaven.
- George Bernard Shaw
Love me when I least deserve it,
because that's when I really need it.
- Swedish Proverb
To the people who love you,
you are beautiful already.
This is not because they're
blind to your shortcomings
but because they so clearly see your soul.
- Victoria Moran
No man stands so tall as when he stoops to help a child.
- Anonymous (often attributed to Abraham Lincoln)
We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone.
Only through our love and friendship can we
create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone.
- Orson Welles
Saying goodbye doesn't mean anything.
It's the time we spent together that matters,
not how we left it.
- Trey Parker
Friendship, like credit, is highest when it is not used.
- Elbert Hubbard
Love is a friendship set to music.
- Joseph Campbell
"Sometimes," said Pooh, "the smallest things take up the most room in your heart."
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
Above all else, my inspiration is friendship.
- Bono
The finest kind of friendship is between people
who expect a great deal of each other but never ask it.
- Anonymous
Each relationship nurtures a strength or weakness within you.
- Mike Murdock
Laughter is not at all a bad beginning for a friendship,
and it is far the best ending for one.
- Oscar Wilde
It is the first law of friendship
that it has to be cultivated.
The second is to be indulgent
when the first law is neglected.
- Voltaire
I used to believe in forever, but forever's too good to be true.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
A friendship that can end never really began.
- Publilius Syrus
The language of Friendship is not words, but meanings.
It is an intelligence above language.
- Henry David Thoreau
Friendship, like the immortality of the soul,
is too good to be believed.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Friendship must dare to risk, or it's not friendship.
- Captain Jean-Luc Picard in the TV show Star Trek: The Next Generation
Friendship is a single soul dwelling in two bodies.
- Aristotle
True friendship is a plant of slow growth,
and must undergo and withstand the shocks of adversity
before it is entitled to the appellation.
- George Washington
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.