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Let these funny Blaise Pascal Quotes lighten up your life. And check out the humorous quotes of many more funny authors in my large collection.
Imagination decides everything.
- Blaise Pascal
Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully
as when they do it from religious conviction.
- Blaise Pascal
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
- Samuel Johnson [also attributed to Oscar Wilde]
Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
- H. L. Mencken
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Happiness is a figment of the imagination.
Imagine happiness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Reality leaves a lot to the imagination.
- John Lennon
Stories of imagination tend to upset those without one.
- Terry Pratchett
Without this playing with fantasy,
no creative work has ever yet come to birth.
The debt we owe to the play of
the imagination is incalculable.
- Carl Jung
The power of imagination makes us infinite.
- John Muir 
Logic will get you from A to B.
Imagination will take you everywhere.
- Albert Einstein
When I examine myself and my methods of thought,
I come to the conclusion that the gift of fantasy
has meant more to me than
any talent for absorbing positive knowledge.
- Albert Einstein
This world is but a canvas to our imagination.
- Henry David Thoreau
Doubt and mistrust are the mere panic of timid imagination,
which the steadfast heart will conquer,
and the large mind will transcend.
- Helen Keller
Generally speaking, a howling wilderness does not howl:
it is the imagination of the traveler that does the howling.
- Henry David Thoreau
The moment a person forms a theory,
his imagination sees in every object
only the traits which favor that theory.
- Thomas Jefferson
Imagination is more important than knowledge.
Knowledge is limited.
Imagination encircles the world.
- Albert Einstein
The debt we owe to the play of imagination is incalculable.
- Carl Jung
Imagination is everything.
It is the preview of life's coming attractions.
- Albert Einstein
Nothing is more dangerous to tradition
than the creative imagination of youth.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The man who has no imagination has no wings.
- Muhammad Ali
My imagination makes me human and makes me a fool;
it gives me all the world and exiles me from it.
- Ursula K. Le Guin
The true sign of intelligence
is not knowledge but imagination.
- Albert Einstein
All the works of man have their origin in creative fantasy.
What right have we then to depreciate imagination.
- Carl Jung
Live out of your imagination, not your history.
- Stephen Covey
Imagination is more important than knowledge.
- Albert Einstein
To raise new questions, new possibilities,
to regard old problems from a new angle,
requires creative imagination and marks real advance in science.
- Albert Einstein
Science does not know its debt to imagination.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
It is usually the imagination that is wounded first,
rather than the heart; it being much more sensitive.
- Henry David Thoreau
I have ready access to a power beyond my wildest imagination.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Why does the eye see a thing more clearly in dreams
than the imagination when awake?
- Leonardo da Vinci
It is above all by the imagination
that we achieve perception and compassion and hope.
- Ursula K. Le Guin
An idea is salvation by imagination.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
There are many ways to be free. One of them is to transcend
reality by imagination, as I try to do.
- Anais Nin
Every human has four endowments- self awareness, conscience,
independent will and creative imagination.
These give us the ultimate human freedom...
The power to choose, to respond, to change.
- Stephen Covey
Formulate and stamp indelibly on your mind
a mental picture of yourself as succeeding.
Hold this picture tenaciously. Never permit it to fade.
Your mind will seek to develop the picture...
Do not build up obstacles in your imagination.
- Norman Vincent Peale
Imagination is more important than knowledge.
For knowledge is limited to all we now know and understand,
while imagination embraces the entire world,
and all there ever will be to know and understand.
- Albert Einstein
I believe in intuition and inspiration.
Imagination is more important than knowledge.
For knowledge is limited,
whereas imagination embraces the entire world,
stimulating progress, giving birth to evolution.
It is, strictly speaking, a real factor in scientific research.
- Albert Einstein
One cannot have wisdom without perspective,
but once gaining perspective, one attains wisdom.
Wisdom is the ability to view every situation
as each person who is in any way affected
by that situation might view it.
Wisdom benefits from having a knowledge of history,
and therefore a historical perspective,
as well from as having the perspective of imagination -
the realm of the what-might-be
inhabited by futurists and science-fiction writers.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
This physical world is to our imagination as ice is to water -
pure water forms pure ice - dirty water forms dirty ice.
Consider how much easier it is to purify water before it freezes
than it is to chip the impurities from the solid ice.
So also, it is much easier to purify your thoughts
before they manifest into physical reality,
than to try to cut the cancerous impurities from solid reality
after you have manifested your thoughts into physical form.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner
Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand
The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
- Henny Youngman
Marriage is a sort of friendship recognized by the police.
- Anonymous
Marriage is a fine institution -
but I'm not ready for an institution yet.
- Mae West
The four most important words in any marriage...
"I'll do the dishes."
- Anonymous
Marriage has no guarantees.
If that's what you're looking for,
go live with a car battery.
- Erma Bombeck
Marriage is a wonderful institution,
but who would want to live in an institution?
- H. L. Mencken
A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler
Do not marry a man to reform him.
That is what reform schools are for.
- Mae West
It's not as great a day for the bride as she thinks.
She's not marrying the best man.
- Anonymous
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
- Phyllis Diller
I was married by a judge.
I should have asked for a jury.
- Groucho Marx
Getting divorced just because you don't love a man
is almost as silly as getting married just because you do.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
In order to be happy with a man,
you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot
and not try to understand her at all.
- Helen Rowland
Husbands should be like Kleenex:
soft, strong, and disposable.
- the movie Clue (1985)
Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire
He's the kind of man a woman would have to marry to get rid of.
- Mae West
One good Husband is worth two good Wives;
for the scarcer things are, the more they're valued.
- Benjamin Franklin
I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police
because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife.
- Ilie Nastase
When two people decide to get a divorce,
it isn't a sign that they "don't understand" one another,
but a sign that they have, at last, begun to.
- Helen Rowland
No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous
When I eventually met Mr. Right
I had no idea that his first name was Always.
- Rita Rudner
Women marry men hoping they will change.
Men marry women hoping they will not.
- Albert Einstein
Whenever I date a guy, I think,
"Is this the man I want my children
to spend their weekends with?"
- Rita Rudner
A man likes his wife to be
just clever enough to appreciate his cleverness,
and just stupid enough to admire it.
- Israel Zangwill
I think men who have a pierced ear
are better prepared for marriage.
They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
- Rita Rudner
The Wedding March always reminds me of the music
played when soldiers go into battle.
- Heinrich Heine
He early on let her know who is the boss.
He looked her right in the eye and clearly said, "You're the boss."
- Anonymous humor
There are four stages in a marriage.
First there's the affair,
then the marriage,
then children
and finally the fourth stage,
without which you cannot know a woman, the divorce.
- Norman Mailer
You never really know a man until you have divorced him.
- Zsa Zsa Gabor
Marriages don't last. When I meet a guy,
the first question I ask myself is:
is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?
- Rita Rudner
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.