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Funny Whenever Quotes
Funny Quotes about Whenever

Let these funny Whenever Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.

To keep your marriage brimming,
With love in the wedding cup,
Whenever you're wrong, admit it;
Whenever you're right, shut up.
- Ogden Nash

Whenever I date a guy, I think,
"Is this the man I want my children
to spend their weekends with?"
- Rita Rudner

Whenever I feel the need to exercise,
I lie down until it goes away.
- Robert Maynard Hutchins

The will to believe chases out the rational mind,
whenever and wherever the two come into conflict.
- Philip K. Dick


 

Some cause happiness wherever they go;
others whenever they go.
- Oscar Wilde

Whenever I find the key to success,
someone changes the lock.
- Anonymous

Discourage litigation.
Persuade your neighbors to compromise whenever you can.
As a peacemaker the lawyer has
superior opportunity of being a good man.
There will still be business enough.
- Abraham Lincoln


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We disrespect ourselves and our free-will
whenever we say that we NEED to do something.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I'm more comfortable with whatever's wrong with me
than my father was whenever he felt he failed or didn't
measure up to the standard he set.
- John Malkovich

Whenever I look in the mirror,
I say to myself: "That Is The Face Of God."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority,
it is time to pause and reflect.
- Mark Twain

Whenever God wakes in us, our thinking
becomes clear - nothing is missing.
- St. Thomas Aquinas

Whenever you're in conflict with someone,
there is one factor that can make the difference
between damaging your relationship and deepening it.
That factor is attitude.
- William James

Whenever the people are well-informed,
they can be trusted with their own government.
- Thomas Jefferson

Whenever I look at a human face,
I say to myself: "That Is The Face Of God."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Whenever you are asked if you can do a job,
tell 'em, Certainly I Can. -
and get busy and find out how to do it.
- Theodore Roosevelt

Whenever an individual or a business decides that success has been attained,
progress stops.
- Thomas J. Watson

Whenever I hear anyone arguing for slavery,
I feel a strong impulse to see it tried on him personally.
- Abraham Lincoln

Whenever you do a thing,
act as if all the world were watching.
- Thomas Jefferson

We cause ourselves untold misery whenever we believe
others to be imperfect and try to change them.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Whenever men take the law into their own hands,
the loser is the law.
And when the law loses, freedom languishes.
- Robert Kennedy

Whenever anyone says, 'theoretically,'
they really mean,
'not really.'
- Dave Parnas

Whenever a man or women is truly inspired,
it is because the same One Universal Spirit
is doing the inspiring.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Let me never fall into the vulgar mistake of dreaming
that I am persecuted whenever I am contradicted.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Whenever a man has cast a longing eye on offices,
a rottenness begins in his conduct.
- Thomas Jefferson

I can release my "responsibilities",
and be "impractical" whenever I choose.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Whenever you are angry, be assured that
it is not only a present evil,
but that you have increased a habit.
- Epictetus

Whenever I fail as a father or husband...
a toy and a diamond always works.
- Shahrukh Khan

I love all kinds of bread.
Whenever I crave junk food, I want salty things like peanuts or potato chips.
- Tyra Banks

Love is missing someone whenever you're apart,
but somehow feeling warm inside because you're close in heart.
- Kay Knudsen

I am favor of cutting taxes under any circumstances and for any excuse,
for any reason, whenever it's possible.
- Milton Friedman

Whenever a doctor cannot do good, he must be kept from doing harm.
- Hippocrates

Be kind whenever possible; and it is always possible.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama

Whenever the World Frowns, I Smile Back.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Where there is unconditional love,
there is no room for unhappiness.
Whenever I look in the mirror today,
I will say to myself: "That Is The Face Of God."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Whenever the pressure of our complex city life thins
my blood and numbs my brain,
I seek relief in the trail; and when I hear the coyote
wailing to the yellow dawn,
my cares fall from me - I am happy.
- Hamlin Garland

Whenever I look at a human face today,
I will say to myself: "That Is The Face Of God."
Whenever I look in the mirror today,
I will say to myself: "That Is The Face Of God."
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

This country, with its institutions,
belongs to the people who inhabit it.
Whenever they shall grow weary of the existing government,
they can exercise their constitutional right of amending it,
or exercise their revolutionary right to overthrow it.
- Abraham Lincoln

Whenever you choose to carry resentment and hatred,
you are shouldering an immense burden that damages
your happiness, and often your health.
Does it matter that your resentment and hatred are "justified?"
Only you suffer - not the person you resent.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Happiness lies in accepting everyone
in our lives EXACTLY as they are.
We cause ourselves untold misery whenever
we believe others to be imperfect and try to change them.
This is the number one rule for a happy relationship.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Allow the president to invade a neighboring nation,
whenever he shall deem it necessary to repel an invasion,
and you allow him to do so whenever he may choose
to say he deems it necessary for such a purpose -
and you allow him to make war at pleasure.
- Abraham Lincoln

Anger and Danger are intimately intertwined.
An angry person is a dangerous person,
whether that person crosses our path
or whether the angry person is ourself.
To complete the anger/danger cycle,
whenever we feel threatened -
when we believe we are in danger -
we tend to exhibit anger as well as fear.
We look for someone to blame for the dangerous situation,
and direct our anger toward them.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

May God grant you always...
A sunbeam to warm you,
a moonbeam to charm you,
a sheltering Angel so nothing can harm you.
Laughter to you.
Faithful friends near you.
And whenever you pray,
Heaven to hear you.
- Irish Blessing

Whenever death may surprise us, let it be welcome if
our battle cry has reached even one receptive ear and
another hand reaches out to take up our arms.
- Che Guevara

Our motto is whenever you make a mistake,
do it twice.
- Neil Finn

They defined what was private and what was public and
they would move it whenever they wished.
- Andrew Morton

The short story is like an old friend who calls whenever he is in town.
We are happy to hear from it; we casually fan the embers of past intimacies,
and buy it lunch.
- R. Z. Sheppard

I think my view is that whenever you project into the
future you're never likely to be accurate in the details,
or the paraphernalia and style.
- Stephen Fry

Whenever you do an animated project or a voice-over
project it's inevitable that part of your personality comes into play.
- Tara Strong

Whenever we take away the liberties of those whom we
hate we are opening the way to loss of liberty for those we love.
- Wendell L. Wilkie

Whenever a fellow tells me he's bipartisan,
I know he's going to vote against me.
- Harry S. Truman

Whenever you make love to someone, there should be three people involved -
you,
the other person, and the devil.
- Robert Mapplethorpe

But now I have a lot of little kids who watched Invader
Zim whenever they could find it on television.
- Jhonen Vasquez

Now, whenever you read any historical document,
you always evaluate it in light of the historical context.
- Josh McDowell

As such people achieve influence within the organization,
whenever there is a conflict between their own interest
and the interest of the organization,
their interests will win out.
- Robert Shea

Whenever a total eclipse of the sun was visible in
an accessible region parties were sent out to observe it.
- Simon Newcomb

I gave out stars whenever an appropriate situation presented itself.
- Willie Stargell

Whenever a separation is made between liberty and justice,
neither, in my opinion, is safe.
- Edmund Burke

The liberals are fighting so hard whenever President
Bush appoints any federal judges.
- Steve Chabot

Coffee on an airplane always smells bad.
Whenever it is served, suddenly the whole cabin stinks of it.
- Jonathan Carroll

Whenever we witness art in a building,
we are aware of an energy contained by it.
- Arthur Erickson

The main reason why we look constantly to the Gita is that,
whenever we need help, we may get it from the Gita.
And, indeed, we always do get it.
- Vinoba Bhave

Whenever I did a good performance, my Dad and my uncles,
who were rabid movie fans, took me to the movies.
There began my underlying love affair with film.
- Mel Torme

Whenever you're sitting across from some important person,
always picture him sitting there in a suit of long red underwear.
That's the way I always operated in business.
- Joseph P. Kennedy

Whenever there is authority, there is a natural inclination to disobedience.
- Thomas Chandler Haliburton

I like cooking but I don't know much and whenever I enter the kitchen,
my mother sends me out!
Because whenever I try a dish from a book,
it comes out bad.
- Soundarya

Whenever I see his finger nails, I thank God I don't
have to look at his feet.
- Athene Seyler

Be ever engaged, so that whenever the devil calls he may find you occupied.
- St.
Jerome

I'm always in that mode - whenever I have a little free time,
I'm always recording songs, writing,
whatever I gotta do.
It's like my job is my vacation.
- Ludacris

Whenever I don't' have to wear makeup,
it's a good day.
- Cameron Diaz

But whenever I look at the question of how to live,
the answer's always staring me in the face.
I'm already doing it.
- Damien Hirst


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May the world be kind to you,
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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

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