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Let these funny Violin Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
A table, a chair, a bowl of fruit and a violin;
what else does a man need to be happy?
- Albert Einstein
A honeymoon should be like a table:
four bare legs and no drawers.
- Anonymous
Never argue at the dinner table, for the one who is not hungry
always gets the best of the argument.
- Voltaire
We receive this food in gratitude to all beings
Who have helped to bring it to our table,
And vow to respond in turn to those in need
With wisdom and compassion.
- Buddhist Blessing
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We gather today in gratitude for the bounty of the land,
the joyful company around this table,
and all the other blessings of this life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
As we join hands in fellowship
around this bountiful table,
we give thanks for the blessings of this food
and the love of these friends
as a symbol of our gratitude
for all the manifold blessings of this life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
However beautiful the strategy,
you should occasionally look at the results.
- Winston Churchill
Religion is the masterpiece of the art of animal training,
for it trains people as to how they should think.
- Arthur Schopenhauer
Procrastination is the bad habit of putting off
until the day after tomorrow what should
have been done the day before yesterday.
- Napoleon Hill
I was married by a judge.
I should have asked for a jury.
- Groucho Marx
Everyone should have at least two friends -
one to talk to and one to talk about.
- Anonymous
I read that you should never go out with someone
if you can think of three reasons why you shouldn't.
- the movie Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason (2004)
Husbands should be like Kleenex:
soft, strong, and disposable.
- the movie Clue (1985)
A benevolent man should allow a few faults in himself,
to keep his friends in countenance.
- Benjamin Franklin
It is an open question whether any behavior
based on fear of eternal punishment
can be regarded as ethical
or should be regarded as merely cowardly.
- Margaret Mead
One should never trust a woman who tells her real age.
If she tells that, she'll tell anything.
- Oscar Wilde
The universe we observe has precisely
the properties we should expect
if there is, at bottom, no design,
no purpose, no evil, no good,
nothing but blind, pitiless indifference.
- Charles Darwin
One should always be in love.
That is the reason one should never marry.
- Oscar Wilde
If I knew for a certainty that a man was coming to my house
with the conscious design of doing me good,
I should run for my life.
- Henry David Thoreau
The physician can bury his mistakes,
but the architect can only advise his client to plant vines -
so they should go as far as possible from home
to build their first buildings.
- Frank Lloyd Wright
Two things a man should never be angry at:
what he can help,
and what he cannot help.
- Thomas Fuller
I will far rather see the race of man extinct
than that we should become less than beasts
by making the noblest of God's creation,
woman, the object of our lust.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
All discarded lovers should be given a second chance,
but with somebody else.
- Mae West
One should never know too precisely
whom one has married
- Friedrich Nietzsche
Bad taste is simply saying the truth before it should be said.
- Mel Brooks
The person who says it cannot be done
should not interrupt the person who is doing it.
- Chinese proverb
People who say it cannot be done should not
interrupt those who are doing it.
- George Bernard Shaw
Laugh when you can,
apologize when you should,
and let go of what you can't change.
Life's too short to be anything... but happy.
- Anonymous
The truth. It is a beautiful and terrible thing,
and should be treated with caution.
- J. K. Rowling
The Ought-To Need-To Tango:
I am racked with the guilt and the pain of I should,
and I ought, and I can't, but I must.
I can't rest; I can't sleep; I'm just not understood,
and I hate that the world is unjust.
I have work; I have woes; I have troubles for life;
but I don't have a ME that I trust.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Everyone should carefully observe
which way his heart draws him,
and then choose that way with all his strength.
- Hasidic Proverb
Man should forget his anger before he lies down to sleep.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
If a man is called to be a street sweeper,
he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted,
or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry.
He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts
of heaven and earth will pause to say,
here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
You either do it completely and utterly,
or you should stop doing it.
- Bono (paraphrase)
The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy
is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet,
alone with the heavens, nature and God.
Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be.
- Anne Frank
I've learned that you should always
leave loved ones with loving words.
It may be the last time you see them.
- Anonymous
Life is a great big canvas,
and you should throw all the paint you can on it.
- Danny Kaye
Those who have come here to hate should leave now;
for in their hate, they only betray themselves.
- Terry Goodkind
Maybe I could have loved you better.
Maybe you should have loved me more.
Maybe our hearts were just next in line.
Maybe everything breaks sometime.
- Jewel
The formula for achieving a successful relationship is simple:
you should treat all disasters as if they were trivialities
but never treat a triviality as if it were a disaster.
- Quentin Crisp
If a man is proud of his wealth,
he should not be praised until it is known how he employs it.
- Socrates
Old age has deformities enough of its own.
It should never add to them the deformity of vice.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
If there is anything that we wish to change in the child,
we should first examine it and see whether it is
not something that could better be changed in ourselves.
- Carl Jung
Many people excuse their own faults
but judge other persons harshly.
We should reverse this attitude
by excusing others' shortcomings
and by harshly examining our own.
- Paramahansa Yogananda
Some people wanted champagne and caviar
when they should have had beer and hot dogs.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
Could we change our attitude,
we should not only see life differently,
but life itself would be different.
- Katherine Mansfield
Neither should a ship rely on one small anchor,
nor should life rest on a single hope.
- Epictetus
Is it not enough to know the evil to shun it?
If not, we should be sincere enough to admit
that we love evil too well to give it up.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
It is more dangerous that even
a guilty person should be punished
without the forms of law
than that he should escape.
- Thomas Jefferson
Whatever words we utter should be chosen with care
for people will hear them and be influenced
by them for good or ill.
- The Buddha
How often I found where I should be going
only by setting out for somewhere else.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
A friend should be a master at guessing and keeping still.
- Friedrich Nietzsche
No one has yet realized the wealth of sympathy,
the kindness and generosity hidden in the soul of a child.
The effort of every true education should be to unlock that treasure.
- Emma Goldman
One that desires to excel
should endeavor in those things
that are in themselves most excellent.
- Epictetus
People should think things out fresh
and not just accept conventional terms
and the conventional way of doing things.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
Every citizen should be a soldier.
This was the case with the Greeks and Romans,
and must be that of every free state.
- Thomas Jefferson
When a man assumes a public trust
he should consider himself a public property.
- Thomas Jefferson
NO ONE has been granted the authority to tell me
how my life should be lived.
I answer only to myself and to Spirit.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I was only the servant of my country and had I, at any moment,
failed to express her unflinching resolve to fight and conquer,
I should at once have been rightly cast aside.
- Winston Churchill
When you are in any contest,
you should work as if there were -
to the very last minute - a chance to lose it.
This is battle, this is politics, this is anything.
- Dwight D. Eisenhower
All major religious traditions
carry basically the same message,
that is love, compassion and forgiveness.
The important thing is they should
be part of our daily lives.
- Tenzin Gyatso, the 14th Dalai Lama
With the fearful strain that is on me night and day,
if I did not laugh I should die.
- Abraham Lincoln
I think, at a child's birth,
if a mother could ask a fairy godmother
to endow it with the most useful gift,
that gift should be curiosity.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
The value of a man should be seen in what he gives
and not in what he is able to receive.
- Albert Einstein
A Bill of Rights is what the people are
entitled to against every government,
and what no just government should refuse, or rest on inference.
- Thomas Jefferson
A man should look for what is,
and not for what he thinks should be.
- Albert Einstein
If a man does not make new acquaintances
as he advances through life,
he will soon find himself alone.
A man, sir, should keep his friendships in constant repair.
- Samuel Johnson
Since you get more joy out of giving joy to others,
you should put a good deal of thought
into the happiness that you are able to give.
- Eleanor Roosevelt
Books and friends should be few but good.
- Anonymous
Things should be made as simple as possible, but not any simpler.
- Albert Einstein
He who would pass his declining years with honor and comfort,
should, when young, consider that he may one day become old,
and remember when he is old, that he has once been young.
- Joseph Addison
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.