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Let these funny Tossed Quotes from my large collection of funny quotes about life add a little humor to your day.
America has tossed its cap over the wall of space.
- John F. Kennedy
It is always with excitement that I wake up in the morning
wondering what my intuition
will toss up to me, like gifts from the sea.
I work with it and rely on it. It's my partner.
- Jonas Salk
A few minutes ago every tree was excited,
bowing to the roaring storm,
waving, swirling, tossing their branches
in glorious enthusiasm like worship.
But though to the outer ear these trees
are now silent, their songs never cease.
- John Muir
A benevolent man should allow a few faults in himself,
to keep his friends in countenance.
- Benjamin Franklin
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Few things are harder to put up with
than the annoyance of a good example.
- Mark Twain
True love is like ghosts,
which everyone talks about and few have seen.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
It has been my experience that folks who
have no vices, have very few virtues.
- Abraham Lincoln
Families are like fudge... mostly sweet with a few nuts.
- Anonymous
Few men have virtue to withstand the highest bidder.
- George Washington
Few people are capable of expressing with equanimity
opinions which differ from
the prejudices of their social environment.
Most people are even incapable of forming such opinions.
- Albert Einstein
I have found out that though the ways in which
I can make myself useful are few,
yet the work open to me is endless.
- Helen Keller
Never believe that a few caring people can't change the world.
For, indeed, that's all who ever have.
- Margaret Mead
Few are those who see with their own eyes
and feel with their own hearts.
- Albert Einstein
Few is the number of those
who think with their own mind
and feel with their own heart.
- Albert Einstein
These are a few of my favorite things.
- Oscar Hammerstein II
Manifest plainness, embrace simplicity,
reduce selfishness, have few desires.
- Lao Tzu
Books and friends should be few but good.
- Anonymous
Wealth consists not in having great possessions,
but in having few wants.
- Epictetus
Men in general judge more from
appearances than from reality. All
men have eyes, but few have
the gift of penetration.
- Niccolo Machiavelli
Never in the field of human conflict
was so much owed by so many to so few.
- Winston Churchill
Be polite to all, but intimate with few.
- Thomas Jefferson
One who is too insistent on his own views,
finds few to agree with him.
- Lao Tzu
Anyone who proposes to do good
must not expect people to roll stones out of his way,
but must accept his lot calmly,
even if they roll a few stones upon it.
- Albert Schweitzer
Can anything be so elegant as to have few wants,
and to serve them one's self?
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
If a free society cannot help the many who are poor,
it cannot save the few who are rich.
- John F. Kennedy
You must not lose faith in humanity.
Humanity is an ocean; if a few drops of the ocean are dirty,
the ocean does not become dirty.
- Mohandas (Mahatma) Gandhi
Everyone has a "best friend" during each stage of life,
but only a precious few have the same one.
- Anonymous
The effort to understand the universe is one
of the very few things that lifts human life
a little above the level of farce,
and gives it some of the grace of tragedy.
- Steven Weinberg
One is taught by experience to put a premium
on those few people who can appreciate you for what you are.
- Gail Godwin
Even in the Christian religion,
much of its real meaning is hidden by words
that are misleading and symbols that but few understand.
- Ernest Holmes
The politician in my country seeks votes,
affection and respect, in that order.
With few notable exceptions,
they are simply men who want to be loved.
- Edward R. Murrow
Few are the giants of the soul that actually feel
that the human race is their family circle.
- Freya Stark
We know but a few men, a great many coats and breeches.
- Henry David Thoreau
The happiest moments my heart knows are those in which
it is pouring forth its affections to a few esteemed characters.
- Thomas Jefferson
We are all "neighbors."
Our world has gotten too small for us to be anything else.
We can no longer have "us" and "them" - friends and enemies.
A person from Iraq, or Russia, or Columbia is
no more a stranger or enemy than a person from across town.
A few people everywhere are troublemakers.
Every religion provokes a few people to become extremists.
Do we need police around the globe? Unfortunately, we always will.
Do we need war? Does that question even deserve an answer?
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
It is curious to observe what different
ideals of happiness people cherish,
and in what singular places they look
for this well-spring of their life.
Many look for it in the hoarding of riches,
some in the pride of power,
and others in the achievements of art and literature;
a few seek it in the exploration of their own minds,
or in search for knowledge.
- Helen Keller
Few people know how to take a walk.
The qualifications are endurance,
plain clothes, old shoes, an eye for nature,
good humor, vast curiosity, good speech,
good silence and nothing too much.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
In the long history of the world,
only a few generations have been granted the role
of defending freedom in its hour of maximum danger.
I do not shrink from this responsibility - I welcome it.
- John F. Kennedy
There are very few human beings who receive the truth,
complete and staggering, by instant illumination.
Most of them acquire it fragment by fragment,
on a small scale, by successive developments,
cellularly, like a laborious mosaic.
- Anais Nin
A proverb is much matter distilled into few words.
- R. Buckminster Fuller
Truth is something which can't be told in a few words.
Those who simplify the universe
only reduce the expansion of its meaning.
- Anais Nin
I like to talk about a thing I call a "practiced pause."
Just a few moments of pausing allows me
to consider a circumstance and take stock
of what the best direction might be.
Reactions tend to rise from habit and unconsidered action.
A Response is considered and thoughtful.
My actions are my own and I am, singularly,
responsible for what I see, say, feel and exert.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Life repeats itself mindlessly -
unless you become mindful, it will go on repeating like a wheel.
That's why Buddhists call it the wheel of life and death,
the wheel of time.
It moves like a wheel: birth is followed by death,
death is followed by birth;
love is followed by hate, hate is followed by love;
success is followed by failure,
failure is followed by success. Just see!
If you can watch just for a few days,
you will see a pattern emerging, a wheel pattern.
One day, a fine morning, you are feeling so good and so happy,
and another day you are so dull,
so dead that you start thinking of committing suicide.
And just the other day you were so full of life,
so blissful that you were feeling thankful to God,
that you were in a mood of deep gratefulness,
and today there is great complaint
and you don't see the point why one should go on living...
And it goes on and on, but you don't see the pattern.
Once you see the pattern, you can get out of it.
- Osho
But friendship is precious, not only in the shade,
but in the sunshine of life, and thanks to a benevolent arrangement
the greater part of life is sunshine.
- Thomas Jefferson
Today is the bridge between the past,
regarding which we unconditionally accept that
everything has occurred according to God's plan,
and a future where we place our unconditional trust
in God's omnipotence and His benevolent design for our lives.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
From wine what sudden friendship springs.
- John Gay
Nothing makes the earth seem so spacious
as to have friends at a distance;
they make the latitudes and the longitudes.
- Henry David Thoreau
The feeling of friendship is like that
of being comfortably filled with roast beef;
love, like being enlivened with champagne.
- Samuel Johnson
A man's friendships are, like his will,
invalidated by marriage -
but they are also no less invalidated
by the marriage of his friends.
- Samuel Butler
A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
- Erma Bombeck
Nothing echoes like an empty mailbox.
- Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts
The worst part of success is to try to find
someone who is happy for you.
- Bette Midler
No man is truly married until he understands
every word his wife is NOT saying.
- Anonymous
A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail.
A best friend is the one sitting next
to you saying "boy was that fun."
- The Maugles
Everyone should have at least two friends -
one to talk to and one to talk about.
- Anonymous
A friend will tell you she saw your old boyfriend -
and he's a priest.
- Erma Bombeck
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin
I have lost friends, some by death ...
others by sheer inability to cross the street.
- Virginia Woolf
The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet
and steady and loyal and enduring a nature
that it will last through a whole lifetime,
if not asked to lend money.
- Mark Twain
Nothing is more cheerful than talking
about our friends' shortcomings.
- Mason Cooley
I'm a very loyal and unreliable friend.
- Bono
A true friend stabs you in the front.
- Oscar Wilde
Marriage is a sort of friendship recognized by the police.
- Anonymous
It is far better to be alone,
than to be in bad company.
- George Washington
Most people enjoy the inferiority of their best friends.
- Lord Chesterfield
"Appeasement" is the policy of feeding your friends to a crocodile,
one at a time, in hopes that the crocodile will eat you last.
- Franklin D. Roosevelt
Nobody can be uncheered with a balloon.
- A. A. Milne (Winnie-The-Pooh)
A lifelong friend is someone
you haven't borrowed money from yet.
- Anonymous
Contrary to general belief,
I do not believe that friends are necessarily
the people you like best,
they are merely the people who got there first.
- Peter Ustinov
We make our friends; we make our enemies;
but God makes our next-door neighbor.
- Gilbert (G. K.) Chesterton
I never considered a difference of opinion
in politics, in religion, in philosophy,
as cause for withdrawing from a friend.
- Thomas Jefferson
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable.